@jusrawb recently posted a thread abt mixing friends. It was more abt yall gays 'mingling and carrying on' but it made me think abt a current situation. A lot of ppl think that when couples break up, their friends should also break up w 'that person'. However, I call b.s.!!! If ur gonna be selfish enough to want to always make it about YOU and YOUR circle, then u have to take that L, if u guys break up! Two of my friend's are close to divorcing, and the wife (college friend) has issues w us maintaining relationships w her hisband. Don't get me wrong, I get the emo stance, but that's bs when u step out and look at it honestly. Like I told her, YOU wanted to make him a part of this circle for the last 11 years. And the real face cracker, is that, had they all known that my ex and I were a couple, n not just 'longtime friends', based on the same logic, they (she and others) wouldnt be my friends, and we wouldn't have been sittin at dinner having said convo, ant her own breakup! This wasnt some fly by night, 'dated for a second' dude. Yall were married, n he became a 100% part of the crew. Because u, selfishly, wanted to always make it abt you and your circle. And that's on u to realize now. Im steadfast in the fact that someone who has become one of my fav ppl over the last decade, is not gonna get dropped by me, because u guys break up. Anyway, what say you guys?
@Nick Delmacy @Ockydub @ControlledXaos @DreG @OhSheit @Tyroc @Omega Level @African King @bisonboy @Infinite_loop @alton
At this point,i think it's up to her to navigate if she wan't space from him.Like,if he's going to be at function,she should just not go.With long-term situations like this,you have to accept people having a different relationship with the object of your ire.Kinda like when parents break up but want the kids to be mad at the other parent,you have to respect people's connections outside of your viewpoint.
It depends on if the separate friends had already branched off into their own spin-ff series with the Husband. If not and the husband was still basically a supporting character on her ensemble show featuring the rest of you, then its totally plausible for her to want him written off of the show. But if Cheers has already become Frasier, then she's fucked. Time for her to start a new show and deal with the occasional cameos and crossover episodes. [Proud of myself for sticking with that analogy and landing it ]
Exactly! If u can't rock in the same room, don't come. Trust, I'd never invite the both of them to something, this soon. Ijs, I'm not abt to keep rearranging my friendships, because str8s have the luxury to not have to fight to maintain relationships! I'm not picking sides if both parties have actively become my friends. Like w my bff (my ex rly liked him because he was a gay person, and he could talk to him). But when that ended, I told my bff that I wasn't cool w them continuing to hang. The diff was, if you wana selfishly always hang, as a couple, w ur friends, suck it up when we all become friends. But nah, u avoided my friends like the plague, because of ur own insecurities, so go over there. If we don't rock, then its an 'oh well' on the fact that, yes!! I now get your friends (ur bad) but u dont get to have mine!
Man, 11 years! I was 22 when I met this guy! A million guys nights, bachelors parties, group getaways, etc, later, Im not gonna push him out because she wanted to make it abt her and her circle over those years.
Well I was the special guest star which landed a recurring feature role on my ex's show for 6 seasons. When I spun off, some of the former cast mates (his sisters) decided to friend me on Facespacegram. While none of them are features on my show, their characters were not written off to die. I have their phone numbers but don't call them not to be mean, but because honestly my ex was glue of that show. I have nothing bad to say about those cast mates at all and would respond to any message they sent me but I don't make first contact. So I agree that old girl just gonna have to deal with it as the world turns and she's living single, she's gonna have to accept that it's a different world and a quantum leap will not occur because she's got a list of ten things she hates about you.
Maybe this is like when one actor asks for more money or decides to leave a successful show to do movies...Maybe she's thinking this show was just fine before he joined the cast, and it will still get renewed for a few seasons after he's gone... I mean, I would feel a certain type of way if an actor was fired from a show but the other writers kept bringing him back for cameos and crossovers. She may be thinking like Det Benson on SVU...she was an OG cast member who stuck it out, so this is her show, fuck Stabler!
If u casted said actor, and he was a hit w the fans for 11 seasons, then oh fukn well! Freefall got yall thinking that all gays can shop a script. Can yall please just go keep doin hair in Atl?!
When the writers decided that my character and my love interest should part ways on our successful romantic buddy cop dramedy, our coupled co-stars decided that the show should go on with us each with new partners and went and hooked my ex up with some Oliver Brady like newbie that was waiting in the wings and hungry for the spotlight like his last name was Harrington. I being a professional thespian, learned to play nice and attend cast parties and get togethers (with the help of lots of alcohol) because the show must go on. I even attend where are they now reunion specials! None of the walk on day players they tried to pair with my character ever worked out being that to become a super couple with an actor/stuntman/key grip like myself is no easy role to take on. Having pride and an ego the size of Texas, I decided to listen to my agent and walk off the show and start over on a new network as the solo star and leave them to fan disinterest and declining ratings. Their show went all seedy and tanked, all of the characters had some shark jumping moments that included arrests for soliciting, a very special health crisis episode, outed at the workplace, turns at DV and attempted murder. Sometimes you gotta know when to walk away from a sinking show and toxic co-stars
Ultimately there has to be some maturity. Trying to force your friends to turn on someone they have grown accustomed to isn't right. I may stop talking to the ex if the reason my friend broke up with them was that they were abusive or really did something messed up, I don't care how cool we got. I don't want friends that do stuff like that regardless.
"So I agree that old girl just gonna have to deal with it as the world turns and she's living single"
It's no different from when you're friendly with your friends "enemy"; it's all petty. I'm not going to be rude or not talk to someone that we both were friends with just because you guys had a falling out. Just trust that I'm not picking sides or tolerating either party talking shit about the other, keep me out of it or I'll cut you both loose. My two best friends in H.S. got together, had a kid who they both agreed that I was the "uncle" and then they broke up a few years after. I'm still close with the female but the male and I are no longer close, but I still go over to his house to HELP him out with his own damn child. He acts funny now - as if I'm fucking his baby moms. We don't talk at all like we use to because he's salty for whatever reason.
