"Where Have All the Real Tops Gone?" and "What Is a 'Real' Top?": Roundtable Discussions

Discussion in 'Sex and Adult' started by Jaa, Feb 5, 2016.

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  1. grownman

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    I know you are outspoken sir. Hence, the reason that I asked the first time-because I think that you watched it. I know the @SB3 didn't watch I believe and know all of you have strong thoughts and I would have loved to see all your faces when said that.

    The other stuff-has nothing to do with what I was looking for from you 3. I should have made it clear because reading vs seeing a face is not good. It was supposed to be said in fun.
    I know that would be the case for me.
     
  2. OckyDub

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    I didn't look at the vids but I do feel nothing is 100%
     
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  3. grownman

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    You beat me to it. I was going to put up the question again.

    Yeah, one of the members of the group posed the question if anyone felt "masculine men have a feminine traits which causes them to desire others?."

    I thought that was interesting and you 3 came to mind. Especially, SB3 because I know he is serious about issues like that.

    But, that is all it was supposed to be. I figured that most people who particpated in this thread didn't watch it. Not in it's entirety. Which is no big deal but that question stood out. I wanted to hear your thoughts.

    I am glad that you brought it back up. I would have. I like clarity. We all "grown ass men." @SB3. You put me back in perspective when I was getting out of hand. Lol.
     
    #38 grownman, Feb 11, 2016
    Last edited: Feb 11, 2016
  4. grownman

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    You got me when I was acting crazy one time. Lol.
     
  5. SB3

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    Maaan, im sooo lost. Idk who marvin is or what post it was, but i'll read it n respond if u tell me where to go
     
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  6. Jaa

    Jaa
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    "Marvin" is Malcolm Travers, the guy running the website and a moderator, of sorts, for the video discussions. In the first video at around 9:30, he says that being attracted to masculinity is, in a way, a feminine trait; that it doesn't make you a girl or anything, but that it's a trait associated with females and femininity. Several, maybe all, of the others disagreed with him or said it's meaningless.
     
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  7. grownman

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    It's this thread-go to the first video and start at 9:13 and listen to what he says. He does a poll asking a particular question that I wanted to get your thoughts. Also, I apologize his name is Malcom. He is the group leader of and they are doing a podcast.
     
  8. grownman

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    Oh ok, he posted his comment before me but yes.
     
  9. SB3

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    So if i pursue a fem dude, im not fem?! Fuk outta here! I fux w masc men, i like men. W balls n hair. If u can wrestle w me, u start w 10 points
     
  10. Jaa

    Jaa
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    I think he was speaking from a literal, stereotypical gender role viewpoint, that females typically want masculine men and men typically like feminine women. In that sense, liking fem dudes would be masculine.

    But he wasn't hardcore about this line of thinking. I think it was a response to a reader question and I don't think he was making a particular point. Obviously, there are masc that like masc, fem that like fem, in-between that like in-between, various combinations of such, and people who aren't looking for any particular level of -inity and can connect with any of them.
     
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  11. grownman

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    He came with a different point of view which is something that made me laugh. I didn't know if you had viewed at the time the thread was put up. I was just saying to myself, I was wondering what you 3 were thinking after hearing Malcom put that out there.

    Lol. I ain't trying to convert you to that way of thinking. I am starting to learn some peoples way of thinking on certain subjects. It is also a way of getting to know others. But it's all good man. Lol.
     
  12. Champagne Papi

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    This brings back memories....the first guy that I have ever dated was a "total top" (whatever the f*ck that means)....to a point that he wouldn't even let me grab his a**. Seriously, like NOT. AT. ALL. And the few times that I tried to f*ck with him and touched his butt, he would chase me and punch my d*ck or some sh*t.

    ....tops who just stick their d*ck in you are so f*cking boring.
    [​IMG]
     
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  13. Champagne Papi

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    ....I hate you for this gif.
     
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  14. Champagne Papi

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    I don't know yeh, I haven't been experiencing this problem....out of the dudes I've talked to/dated, only one of them was a bottom. The rest were tops or verse tops or tops that have bottomed once/twice before.


    ....which brings me to a point. There's this guy I've been talking to for a minute now and neither of us have brought up the sexual position talk. And I don't know how to ask because truthfully, I'm afraid to ask....because if he's a top, I don't know exactly how I'll feel about things.
     
  15. SB3

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    I hear u. None of this is personal man.
     
  16. SB3

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    In my experience, guys are a LOT more flexible than we think. Just dont let the position talk deter you unless he's super stiff.
     
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  17. Champagne Papi

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    From my experience, the talk has left me with negative feelings....but I'll work on that and get over the anxiety of it.
     
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  18. Cyrus-Brooks

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    I can understand your point with this "total tops" are boring in bed. They don't suck dick, don't eat ass, don't want you to touch their ass, often times they don't do foreplay or kiss, they just wanna fuck that's it.....boooooring!
    [​IMG]
     
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  19. SB3

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    Besides, 1 of my lil bros is crushing on @Champagne_Papi tuff! N he's over here sleepin...
     
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  20. Champagne Papi

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    That's terrible.

    ....I mean, there are tops like that and I'm not judging them (sh*t, do you), it's just that, that's something that I wouldn't do.

    At least throw your dude some neck or something....don't just f*ck him and then go to sleep.
     
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  21. Champagne Papi

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    What happened now, what did I miss??

    ....I'm so confused, Lol.
     
  22. Jai

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    I'm pretty passive but I like Tops that will let you play with their butt...lol

    Some dudes are fine with being plowed only and that's. I have a friend who identifies as verse top but he doesn't like head but will gladly give it.

    I dont think Tops that dont want you messing with their butt is a problem since everyone doesn't like anal play. There are the plethora of things you can do and gay tantric positions can spice up things as well. Even dealing with those types of Tops...blindfolds & handcuffs can be fun Im sure.

    I do remember one guy I was experimenting with. He said he was a TOTAL TOP....So I kinda tested him and played with his butt and he then he later said I think Im a verse top...I might want to try a dildo..

    I was like reallynow

    I also forgot to mention how most gay men equate having a big penis to being a top. It's like some guys just figure that for some reason....
     
    #57 Jai, Feb 17, 2016
    Last edited: Feb 17, 2016
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  23. SB3

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    Is it too much for me to say that unless a dude has a medical condition that affects his wood ability, I kinda have less respect for guys who just lay there?!

    Ijs, if u prefer to bottom, then do ur thing, literally! Give me some masculine energy man! I can walk outside and find a woman to lay there and softly moan, right now!
     
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  24. SB3

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    On top of this thread being over a year old, he's not even a member anymore
     
  25. Jai

    Jai Being strong minded.
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    Where have all the Tops gone? Personally, I'd be a little upset if my Top told me I couldn't play with/eat his buns just a little, provided he cleans himself properly back there. Hahaha.. All of him belongs too me and I will indulge...With a cherry on top.
     
  26. SB3

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    A gay man that wont let u play w his booty at all is as whack as a 'don't touch my dik' bottom.

    If there is NOTHING about me that u like, that women don't have, we got a problem.
     
  27. Aejae

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    10943758.gif
     
  28. OhSheit

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    I'm reading this, reflecting on all the other masculine dudes I've been with or talked to that have tried to change me, wanted me to be a houseboy/wife, wanted me to wear particular underwear when it was time to fool around, had a preference for fem dudes before me but trying something new or want to be with woman in the long term.

    [​IMG]
     
  29. Jai

    Jai Being strong minded.
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    This thread has made me confused now. I guess it boils down to individual preference in the long run.
     
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  30. Champagne Papi

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    [​IMG]
    & I'm still lost
     
  31. JodyBell87

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    Bottom and Top are simply sexual roles. Characteristics such as fem/masc should not be attached. Being more fem or more masc does not make you more/less of a role.
    Think about it: Race can be argued the same way. Black and white are just races. Being in articulate doesn't make me less black then someone who speaks ebonics.
    It's foolery.
     
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  32. sydney

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    It's complicated

    Dude you said a mouth full. One time I was dating a strict top and I thought at the time that was what I wanted. Come to find out I just wasn't into being bent over all the damn time. Eventually we broke up and for years I became a top because I felt like I suffer when I was a bottom. Now I have been in a long term relationship and we are versatile. So you are definitely right, quite a few bottoms will top on a dime. I remember years ago I hook up with this guy I met online and my profile said I was a bottom. But we hook up and I top him first and I was the one that made that move. He was shock and said, "I thought you was a bottom" and I said, I guess I am versatile today. Not to offend any strict "Tops" on this site, but I think strict tops and especially those of them that has never been penetrated before, are the worst fu***king lovers ever. Just my 2cents.
     
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  33. ControlledXaos

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    I think tops should at least try to see what it's like. If you're packing 8+ what's stopping you from trying Simone smaller in the 7 and below range? I think it gives good pov. As a verse dude I think I'm in the I do alright section. Also he who has the biggest Wang isn't automatically the top.

    Plus catching that stimulated prostrate nutt is insane.I encourage everyone to find their spot even solo.

    However total/strict bottoms some of them don't even want their penis touched for whatever reasons. I can't imagine that but that's how some guys are. They're a a key for every lock though so these strict binary guys do find each other.

    Sexual chemistry is an intangible thing. I may drop it low spread it wide and toot it up down and side to side for one guy but wouldn't consider it with another. Sometimes you have to meet up with the guy that brings certain things out of you. Not everyone will be able to do that.
     
  34. Jai

    Jai Being strong minded.
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    I know I already commented to this but I have to say that I like TOPs but not passive Tops. I'm not oppossed to topping a guy but he'd had to really turn me on to do it. I have a very sly mindset. I will try to mess with a Tops booty to see how he reacts. Every man can't bottom. Some guys are strict Tops cause they can't take peen, while there are others that are super selfish.
     
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  35. thane

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    I usually tend to bottom but with the right guy, sometimes to my own surprise, I find myself getting toppy and plowing him in return........those relationships have usually been the best. That said, total tops I've had extended relationships with have been fun and mutually satisfying. So I'm left agreeing with Jai on this one.

     
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