On Loving White People and Hating Whiteness

Not a bad piece at all. Lots of knowledge and truth here.

Can I get an older snowqueen now?(joking!)


*one problem...you cannot 'fully' address white privilege, or racism, without addressing it's equally ugly twin, classism.
The biggest 'privilege' is green, not white, and the elites use race and class to keep us divided. Woe to them if stupid underclass whites(one third of whites are living at under 200% of the poverty line) ever 'wake up' to the truth.

@Lancer Do you live in the US? And that guy looking at his phone while you talked was just rude as hell.

 

I really only associate with Africans (mostly Nigerians and other West Africans) and African-Americans in ATL so I don't really have issues here. I can only imagine how it is to deal with Caucasians whether it is friendship or relationship in a climate like this.

 

This is a very sad and troubling post. Especially from someone so young. Maybe Lancer is right and we really are doomed as a nation. smh.

 

I am only stating who I mainly associate with however I am not opposed to connecting with people from other races. I have friends from all races/ethnicities but since getting involved in the LGBT community in ATL, I have really mainly come across those of African descent.

I have nothing against people who are not of African descent. They just need to be WOKE.

 

Ok..this is very different from this:

"I really only associate with Africans (mostly Nigerians and other West Africans) and African-Americans in ATL so I don't really have issues here. I can only imagine how it is to deal with Caucasians whether it is friendship or relationship in a climate like this."


" I can only imagine how it is to deal with Caucasians whether it is friendship..." suggests that you do not have friends from all races/ethnicities. So those are two very different posts. I am perfectly fine with your second post

The first post just suggested exclusion based on race to me-which is exactly what the crazies, racists, fascists, etc. like that Charlotte scum want. They want increased division and increasingly opposed and increasingly hostile camps. We cannot let them win or Lancer will be right the US will definitely go right down the toilet.

 

Stupid ppl are everywhere, but I am definitely aware of the privileges of living in a cultural melting pot like nyc. The exposure to different backgrounds and cultures that is available is unparalleled.

 

Here's my unpopular black opinion. I don't think it's possible for a black person to truly love a white person and vice versa. There is too much of a power imbalance and misunderstanding between the two groups to make love possible. Even friendship can be problematic if the white person doesn't understand how structurally advantaged they are in American society. From my experience very few white people actually get how much white supremacy and privilege permeates aspect of life in this country, because they don't have. It's not something they have to think about. After a while it becomes tiresome even annoying to have to constantly explain it especially when incidents like Charlottesville happen. Most black people get it because we have to. It's something that's ever present. Not being aware of how the white power structure works can dangerous even deadly in some situations especially for black boys and men.

 

*white

 

lol you silly

 

I want no parts of white gays my age range on any level. Been there, tried it, can't even deal with them on forums or social media. Worst breed ever.

 

Seeing how alot of these apps are(no blacks!) and social media young white gays are, I don't even blame you.

 

Cosign, These white boys who into "race play" are way outta control. They are getting even more bold now saying shit like "n****r dick" or just casual saying n****r in general. Calling black men apes and monkeys. Alot these white gay men are joining the alt-right. What’s Attracting Gay Men to the Fascist, White Nationalist Alt-Right? Bruthas better wake up. These are not people you want to fuck or date.

 

I'm not sure if this is satire or are you really being serious

Either way this meme is complete and utter bullshit.

 

Growing up on long island surrounded by white people and dealing with white gays. I would rather die alone and never have sex again in my life, before messing with, looking at or dating a white man. White gays are racist, just like their hetero brothers, if not more. I genuinely feel bad for black men in relationships with white men. I Don't understand why a person would do that to themselves.

 

Yes totally I agree! That seems to be the reality and it suits me perfectly!

 

It is sad how this thread started with a decent article and has descended into basically a place for venting and sweeping generalizations about all white gays.

The ruling elites and Trumptards are winning-dividing and conquering.

I can only hope that this tactic may eventually backfire, and bringing all the animosity, hatreds, and bitterness to the surface will ultimately bring about reasonable discussion that will end in something better....


Sometimes I forget if this site is a place for masc black gay men who don't identify with the mainstream gay agenda(and their supporters)or a place to bash femme black gays or vent against white gays. *sigh*

 

Lol yeah that may have been to much, but my experience of trying to build genuine relationships growing up with white people/men, has always ended up with them trying to separate and devalue my experience of being a black man or realizing that I was seen through a stereotypical lens. Many of these people who I known since elementary/middle school. Every time I would try to have a genuine conversation about race, it would be met with deflection. Even if a white person did not show any signs of them being racist, once I began to meet their friends and family, I was ALWAYS introduced to someone or multiple people that were racist. I'm not saying it's impossible to have a relationship/friendship with a white person, but my experience of being a black man, I felt was always dismissed, diminished or fetishzied.

 

Mentioning that the events in Charlottesville as an event that causes division is kind of the navieness that makes dealing with white people very frustrating and difficult. Because America was a racist country long before the events in Charlottesville and way before Donald Trump even ran for President and people began being more open about being racist. We as black people still had to deal with a country full of people with this mentally since it's inception. The events of Charlottesville and the elections of Donald Trump only proved what many black people already felt and thought about this country. The surprised reaction of many white people about these events, just shows the lack of self-reflection that many Americans have. That what makes it difficult to deal with many white people, because it is not our job to teach you about your history, culture, your family and friends. On top of dealing with a racist society. For me I learned that for my dignity and mental health that it is easier to deal with my own.

 

*sigh*
Nice words, but don't be too hard on yourself. Gays usually are bitches, black or white....

 

Ur more than welcome here man. Shared race/ethnicity/___ doesn't always equate to shared opinion.

 

Coon City

 

No I just don't like blanket statements.

 

...then why do you contribute to making them? I don't see you policing other people or yourself every time there's generalizations about Black people on here or irl.

Anyway, why are you extending your hand to him? He's been told multiple times that he's welcomed here. We don't need to have this talk with him over and over again. When given a space like this and some of the topics that are posted some members are going to vent about certain experiences, situations or groups of people. We're going to rag on white people/gays every now and then and as a person that takes pride in being a minority on here Columbus Circle is gonna have to fucking deal with it. Stop being so sensitive and taking everything so literal, enough with the white guilt, feeling like his opinion isn't valued, and stop being so passive aggressive and throwing subs.

 

Who are u talking to? I'm assuming this is meant for him and not me. I don't need a keyboard to speak my mind. I say what I want when and where I want. Y'all are free to keyboard thump about the man and anything else all y'all would like. I'll continue to say what I want to say on CA and anywhere else whenever I want to say it.

 

First bit was about you, but I was partially joking and the rest Columbus Guy, obviously.

 

*edit* sorry I had come home from a long shitty day at work and have no hot water right now, bullshit notice from landlord, etc. -should not have posted in that state of mind last night. my bad.

 

Even outside of the privilege piece, for me, there's too much of a cultural barrier.

I'm open to dating outside my race but if I'm going to call myself loving you, we need to click. You need to understand things like my sense of humor, my upbringing, and why I view situations in certain ways. For me, a lot of these paradigms are ingrained in black american culture and aren’t necessarily transferrable.

More often than not, I'll absent-mindedly throw out a phrase/adage or proceed to joke only to have the meaning either misinterpreted or misunderstood altogether.

This doesn't mean that I don't get along with white folks but there's always a thin divide that would be hard, if not impossible, to cross when dating.

For some, it’s not a problem to not necessarily be culturally understood. For me it's, more or less, a requirement although I do recognize that nothing is set in stone…

…Cus bay-bee – some of these white boys, middle-easterns, Africans, Indians, etc could get it and I’d fck around find a husband in the process