3 Month Dating Curse?

Discussion in 'Dating and Relationships' started by Franky, Jan 5, 2019.

?
  1. 3 months or less

    7.7%
  2. 3 to 6 months

    15.4%
  3. 6 to 12 months

    23.1%
  4. 1 to 3 years

    7.7%
  5. 3 to 5 years

    7.7%
  6. More than 5 years

    38.5%
  1. Franky

    Franky Dreamer by day, Dreamer by night

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    Isn't it time that we accept the fact that most of us are not hardwired for long term relationships. As a matter of fact, we emotionally check out soon after the "honeymoon phase" is over (typically 3 months or less).

    Looking back at my own dating life, this is pretty much accurate for the most part. No matter how great everything was going in the relationship, some diabolical force would always rear its ugly head and bring everything to a screeching halt.

    I believe that a lot of gay/bisexual men only enjoy the newness of the relationship and all the firsts that come along with it. (First date, First kiss, First time making love, First sleepover, First time saying I love you, etc.) For some people, the thrill is gone once they reach these milestones in their relationship. For others, they simply get bored after knocking boots with the same dude for the past few months.

    20181214_201023.png

    Since many people can never seem to keep their relationship train on the tracks longer than 3 months, they're often left wondering "where did I go wrong?" By placing unrealistic expectations on your dating life, you're setting yourself up for failure and disappointment.

    Instead, try focusing on maintaining your relationship for that particular season. If your relationship evolves into something greater and sustains itself far past the 3 month window, even better.

    tumblr_m147aahXBI1qdn1juo1_r1_500.gif

    Like the saying goes "Instead of looking for Mr. Right, look for Mr. Right now." Better yet, try looking for your Mr. Spring, Mr. Summer, Mr. Fall and Mr. Winter. They do say "variety is the spice of life." Now, I'm not saying go out into the world and become an unbridled hoe. I'm simply saying if you want something different, do something different. Stop following the status quo.

    20181214_214042.png

    We can't all keep chasing that fantasy of living happily ever after with the same person for all eternity. To all the couples who've been able to actually pull that sh*t off, I commend you and envy you at the same time. However, I also recognize that what works for some doesn't always work for others.

    For now, I no longer have the shadow of this so called 3 month curse hanging over me. I actually do look at it as a blessing that arms me with the mental fortitude to move on after a break-up and open myself up emotionally for the next beautiful stranger that crosses my path.


    20181212_044737.png
     
  2. takeyourmeds91

    The 1000 Daps Club

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    Your point could be made for almost anything. You get that new phone and swear you're gonna take care of it then 3 months later you end up throwing it around. You get a new car and you hand-wash it yourself, keep junk out of the cabin, etc and 3 months later you keep skipping over getting a carwash and an oil change. Monogamy isn't the issue. It's been said many times before but we're so used to instant gratification that we don't know how to appreciate the shit we have.

    As it relates to a relationship, there has to be something that attracts you to your partner outside of looks and what they do for a living. Realistically, the way our society is set up, those are the first few things you have access. But in the first few dates, we overlook character, hide our personal esoterics, and present a person that's not true to who we are on a regular basis. We're all out to make a great first impression but in that, there's the potential to attract the wrong people for us.

    That's why shit fails because after the "honeymoon" period, you look up and you realize, though you have love for that person, you don't like that mothrfckr and yall barely even share similar interests....

    Edit: And another thing, stop getting into relationships if you know damn-well you don't want to be in one or don't have the bandwidth for it...be honest and just tell folks you tryna kick it
     
    #2 takeyourmeds91, Jan 6, 2019
    Last edited: Jan 6, 2019
  3. ControlledXaos

    Squad Veteran Most Valuable Player The 1000 Daps Club

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    I have done the relationship thing a few times. All beyond 3 months.

    At this point in my life, I don't want feelings. I want an activity partner or someone to cuddle with and see naked a few times. But relationship? No. I'm not ready for that again and not going to pretend. I'm enjoying my solitude and independence right now. I can't say I'm in a Hoe Stage either. I'm just single and have moments when I'm feeling lonely and want intimacy with someone but I don't act on it.
     
    takeyourmeds91, Winston Smith and Franky dapped this.
  4. Winston Smith

    Best Site Comments The 1000 Daps Club Supporter

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    Well the current one is now 8 months and it looks like it’s going to be a keeper. I was like @ControlledXaos this time last year, so never say never!
     
  5. takeyourmeds91

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    This is exactly where I am too
     
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  6. SB3

    SB3 is a Featured MemberSB3
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    3 months? Only gay mofos running around talking about their 'ex' of 3 months...
     
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  7. SB3

    SB3 is a Featured MemberSB3
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    :ufdup:
     
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