Best Posts in Thread: A Text Book Example of Toxic Hyper Masculinity

  1. JNH412

    JNH412 I'm everywhere | I'm hard to find
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    This was some disgusting sh*t...

    To be really real, it is time as a group of "masculine" brothas to acknowledge that muh f*ckas is on to something with this toxic masculinity stuff.

    Getting G-checked in the hood is part of everyday life for ppl that's in the hood. I just recently had to restrain myself from beatin on this lil 5 foot nothin dude at this liquor store in Flint. All I did was get out the car and ol dude started yelling"Beat a n*gga ass in some flip flops" multiple times... I was obviously the only nigga with some Jordan flip flops on, it was also obvious that this dude was suffering from the toxicity of a hyper-masculinized projection. Check another nigga on his manhood in order to reaffirm your own... Classic hyper-masculinized endeavor... Homie thought cuz he was with a bunch of his boys that they would back him if I wanted to make the beef legit... I ended up peacing up all the n*ggas he was with because I was in my hood and they all been knowing me since I was a lil nigga except for him. They started saying "Don't mind him" because they all know what could've happened.

    I done had shotguns and glocks pulled on me, done had niggas say I wasn't a real man/strong man cuz I didn't perfectly meet the parameters of one in their opinion. None of this is new and it happens on both the macro/extreme level such as this filmed example and even in micro/banal interactions.

    I'm just waiting on a time when I can be a man and not have to beat somebody ass to prove it.
     
    #2 JNH412, Jul 14, 2016
    Last edited: Jul 14, 2016
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  2. Winston Smith

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    Obviously "fem" and "masc" dudes both catch different grief for different reasons, especially among black folk. It's not anti-fem prejudice to point out that black masc viewpoints are sublimated by mainstream straight and gay media. Nor is it wrong to point out masc dudes catch special kinds of brief because we don't "scan" as "stereotypical gay" which puts some straight males in a panic; if they can't "sort us out" from the general "gay population" it threatens their fragile masculinity to think we might walk among them, in work, gyms, military, etc. (someone should do a gay horror parody and call it "The Unclockable").

    This early episode of "All In The Family" addressed the whole fem/masc gay thing decades before it was even on most folk's radar, let alone general LGBT issues. Archie is doubly shocked to find out his ex-NFL, sports loving bar buddy is gay as opposed to his son in laws effeminate and foppish friend who is actually straight. His reaction at the bar (18:00 into episode) is something I can relate to, as most black folk in my life have the same reaction to me and other masc gay/bi bros
     
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  3. OckyDub

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    In the world of mainstream media, blogs, vlogs, websites and social media; phrases or terms like toxic masculinity, hyper-masculinity, #MasculinitySoFragile, misogyny, sexism and homophobia are in my opinion often misused for the silliest of situations. Not in this case pertaining to the disturbing video below.



    It has been scientifically proven that those who identify as heterosexual, who aggressively outwardly express anti-homosexual attitudes are usually attempting to hide and deflect their own bisexual or homosexual tendencies. I’m not saying this is the case here but it is very possible.

    The disturbed individual who pointed his gun at the African American man exiting the store, who he referred to as a “dick in the booty ass nigga”, goes by the Twitter handle @Binswanson and his Facebook page is Flex Swan Finesse. His Twitter account under this handle has now been made private but not before the video uploaded went viral.

    He not only had to prove to those in the car with him how intact his masculinity is by speaking and displaying his disdain for homosexuals; he also was compelled to record the criminal act and share it with his 2000 plus followers and the world via social media. Once it went viral, he replied to the understandable outrage by stating, “All the gay people mad. “I don’t give a fuck about none of that shit y’all saying I hate gay niggas save that shit.” He also went on to say in a Periscope video that he would have shot the man who was wearing the “tight” pants.

    What you witnessed was masculine fragility. Even though the sexuality of the man who had the gun pulled on him is not known, this was gay bashing. This was bullying. This was menacing. Also on a small scale, this was terrorism.

    [​IMG]

    The Detroit police department is actively investigating this incident so of course this hoodlum idiot is going to be arrested and possibly jailed. He possibly could even be prosecuted under Federal Hate Crime laws. Unfortunately this will add another Black body to the US prison industrial institutional system.

    I could make this about homophobia in the Black community perpetrated by Black men but I don’t feel like reading a bunch of “white people do it too” comments, so I’ll finish with just two points.

    First; why is it that gay-bashers cowardly hunt in packs? If you view non-heterosexuals as weaker than or easy targets, why not single handily commence the attack? Why is a group typically needed to harass, violate, physically attack and kill a homosexual? Shouldn’t a anti-homosexual masculine man be able to attack a homosexual without weapons, tricks, or sneak attacks on his own? Isn’t that a better way to show stronger hyper-masculine prowess?

    Secondly, (and I know this is offensive to most) at what point can it be universally acknowledged that anti-non-heterosexual attitudes and resentments are rooted in religion? Anti-homosexual beliefs are taught and passed down from generation to generation. Even passive tolerance is just as much damaging. “Hate the sin (homosexuality), love the sinner” or “I’m against discrimination but I’m also against the Gay Lifestyle”, is still oppressive and dangerous. By the way, what the fuck is the “gay lifestyle”?

    These attitudes and ideologies heard by the minds of non-heterosexuals at an early age can lead to psychological dysfunctions, depression, suicide, STI transmissions, substance abuse, self-hate and deceptions from being in the closet.

    Worse, these attitudes continue to influence and contribute to violence inflicted upon homosexuals and transgenders such as the case with the massacre at the Pusle night club in Orlando, FL.

    I’ve had a gun pulled on me during a carjacking, it’s surreal and terrifying. To the Black man in the video who had the gun pulled on him… stay strong brotha.

    *** *** ***

    Detroit police are asking the victim or if you know the person with the gun to call 313-596-2200. Click Man points gun at person in suspected gay hate crime Twitter video to see the news report video of the story.








    Read the whole post here.
     
    #1 OckyDub, Jul 13, 2016
    Last edited: Jul 14, 2016
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  4. OckyDub

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    and I would add many of them (feminine dudes) prop and put themselves up on a pedestal as the real true representation of what a real Gay is. If you don't fit that narrow standard, then some how you are not brave, DL or hiding. Fuck that.
     
  5. ControlledXaos

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    Tryna find out who you talking about, Jewld.

    You know, there are masculine, out, gay men in the world. Are there closeted, gay black men? Sure. And they are not DL either. You are generalizing all gay masculine gay men. I thought we were trying to diffuse these ideas on both sides? Fem gay men usually can't 'hide' their "feminine" qualities from others. Masculine men can 'pass' for straight. Maybe this is viewed as a benefit. Maybe not. But if that gay man is really masculine and doesn't fit into the fem or 'queer' lane, he gets talked about and described as not "living in his truth." Why can't we accept that gay men are not all alike? It's not masculine gay men's fault that 'society' views feminine gay men negatively. However, we can speak up for those gay men. On the flip side, masculine gay men, even if they are not DL, get called DL because that same society doesn't understand that gay men can be masculine and also have zero interest in females.

    While I agree that many black people, gay, straight, trans, etc, don't value or respect each other enough to not kill each other is shameful. However, you out here calling this man 'crippled' and 'handicapped' which he probably takes offense to. Help yourself help your cause.

    You are referencing grade school. Well let me tell you, about 90% of the dudes in my high school who rattled out the terms 'f@g' and sugar booty... I have the receipts on their same sex escapades as I found out about them years later from different sources. If some dude in high school had some sexual repression and years later came to terms with it, how can you still pass judgement on someone who wasn't even a fully mature adult when it comes to matters of sexual identity? Sure, they could be bi, gay, DL or whatever now. But we can't be holding on to the same messed up stuff that happened before we had a high school diploma. You have to let some stuff go and move on.

    There's nothing wrong with wanting to date a masculine dude. Most here want masculine contemporaries but I don't think we are all looking for the 'thug'. Most off the dudes here want a regular, average Joe type of dude, not a roughneck.
     
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  6. Dante

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    To be clear, just because a gay man is masculine does not mean he is on the DL/Closeted. There are gay men who are on the DL/closetd men, including feminine gay men who are actors giving women the "pseudo" masculine man to suppress/hide their gayness. You can be masculine and Out with your sexuality, gay or bisexual.

    You cannot concur that in order to be a gay man, you have to be feminine or else, you are closeted/on the DL. That is an assbackwards perception on being a gay man. And with that perception is the problem. The problem that gives the heteronormative world the notion that "that is what being gay is". And with that, misconceptions and stereotypes taint being gay or bisexual and gives fuel to unneccesary homophobia.

    I cannot stress it enough. Feminine gay men breathe the stereotyping of how a lot of people think of gay men, especially the ones who mimic the female existence. And that is a concurrent problem that does not help us showcase us as men amongst the other type of man that is only looked at as being "what a man is" amongst the masses.

    Ijs!
     
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