New Year New Me....BS

My only issue with what you said is the argument that it was the truth. You nor I or even your friend knows what 2016 will bring, and I think there is a line between living in an alternate reality and being optimistic about one's future, although I don't know what he was saying so that doesn't matter. I have a friend that would jokingly say all the time that I love to "stomp on people's dreams". I merely saw it as me being realistic and providing her with the proper view of seeing things, but as time goes on I've realized how much my pessimism and negativity has effected her...discouraging her in just a small way not to purse her goals. Long story short I don't think it was wrong of you to voice your opinion of the way things will be, but at the end of the day it's just that..your opinion..not necessarily the truth. I want my friends to be honest with me but I also want people that will inspire me to do my best.

Edit:
I don't mean to sound preachy btw I completely understand your point and how you view things I just wanted to share my thoughts on it cause I just had a conversation about this recently.

 

Yeah again I didn't mean to come off as self righteous or anything lol I could totally see myself being that way to one of my friends if they were overly zealous for the New Year. I think for some you can't help but to look for hope during times like these. Winter can be a depressing season and it brings us momentary excitement.

 

I think very few people want blunt real talk in that kind of conversation, or will only readily accept it when it's presented in a very constructive manner (which may not be considered "real talk" if someone feels that they have to send their message through a mental filter before voicing it). I've heard numerous people talk about how they need to change their lives and are about to get started yet things remain the same for years or changes are relatively short-lived. I typically hold my tongue or occasionally try to ask questions that may inspire them to look back at their previous efforts, think about what didn't work or why they didn't go through with it, and realize they may want to change up their approach since it didn't work last time.

I believe most genuinely want to change but are not prepared or may lack the fortitude to make tough changes. I feel like real talkers and dreamers that talk but don't act tend to keep a distance from one another. The dream talk can become repetitive and annoying, and the bluntness may be considered rude or pessimistic even if honest. And I don't think you're the type but there are those who crap on others and excuse it by claiming that they're just keeping it real.

If I seek feedback, I want an honest answer, but I generally don't regarding my future because I can be fickle and don't want to be held accountable later. I'd rather make a decision, do it on my timeline and discuss it later rather than raise an idea, repeatedly change my mind and have people question what I'm doing. Of course, a vague, regularly changing timeline is often an excuse to procrastinate, something I personally need to improve.

 

I think is someone is genuine about the things they want to change then there's nothing wrong with that, in fact that should be encouraged. Just as long as one is realistic in their vision and methods.

Your reaction might have threw a monkey wrench into his plans.

 

I wouldn't say you were wrong for questioning him as long as it didn't come off as discouraging. I mean, you didn't have to laugh in his face, but I'm imagining it was just a chuckle.
Anyways, it's good to see people want better for themselves, so long as there's not too much emphasis on the "New Year", and not enough on the "New Me", which isn't gonna change anything but the date.

 

This. Nothing magical is going to happen after you wake up up later on January 1. People often times have good intentions and that's great to have goals but few people sit down and figure out the part of it where they actually plan out how to achieve said goals.

"Imma eat right and get fit in xxxx! "

Ok great but tossing out all of your Oreos and filling your fridge with romaine lettuce and tilapia isn't the fix. There's more to it than that.

Or" Imma get my finances together "" Imma finally write that book "" Imma go back to school "

All of these are great. Just take time to figure out how you'll accomplish it with a plan, schedule and deadlines.

So I think the when this topic comes up just ask people...

"Ok cool! So what's your plan?/How are you planning to do [thing]?"

 

Sh!t, dude. Sometimes the "Smirk & Chuckle" can be worse than the outright laugh. I use the "Smirk & Chuckle" along with the "This $hit givin' Me a Headache" forehead touch QUITE frequently, myself, with the sole purpose of lettin' a muhf@ka know..."Ni@@a shut up, you full of $h!t".
In some cases it's necessary, e.g....if you know someone thats 300+ lbs, and for the past 10 New Years they been saying "Maaaan. Ima drop this weight, New Year, New Body" and that person is STILL 300lbs, then I'm all for the "Smirk & Chuckle" and "This $hit Givin' Me a Headache", AAAND just to drive the point home throw in a "Mmpff...Lemme stretch and take in a deep breath, roll my eyes to the side, and roll 'em back at this ni@@a so he know Im bored with the Bull@hit". Just be prepared that this might just be the year you gotta eat your hat with a fork and a spoon, 'cause they might just drop that weight. LOL Not saying this is the situation you were in, I just use it because it's a very, very common New Year "resolution" that very few ever fulfill.

 

There's nothing about the new year that's different about today.If you're ready for change,I don't see why you can't jump on that asap.
I think you shouldnt have laughed at the dude.If he's expressing a desire to improve he should be encouraged,even if he is acting like the new year is somehow going to sprinkle him with fairy dust that will make his goals more achievable.

 

Folks already said it. I see it both ways. The New Year can definitely be a strong motivating factor to start new things. But if you were genuinely serious about making changes, you wouldn't need an arbitrary date to start. I figure I'll let people do what they want. I wouldn't have responded the way you did, but I don't knock you for it,

 

If he's ur friend, then fuk it. He knows u.

But if its just another dinner party guest, u mighta been a lil not right