That might have been a squad member on a podcast, not me...I'm hood enough to walk both sides of the line. I'm def not Yusuf Mack hood though...I have all of my teeth.
Agreed. I've heard that as well. To the average person white is basically someone that looks white and isn't a light skinned person of color lol.
LOL WHEN?! According to the US Census if they come to the US, they are considered White. But I guess technically speaking they are Irish-American. I am a Nigerian but of course in America before I get to state that to anyone, they see a BLACK/AFRICAN-AMERICAN man. It is what it is.
Yeah it depends who I'm around I've noticed. If I'm back home and relaxed or upset than my New York side comes out. Other than that I'm just straight geek status
She was on 'The Real' and acknowledged that she is born White but identifies as a black woman because she says being black is in your soul and is a feeling more than the color of your skin.... Let me try to say I am White and see the backlash I get hahaha
@Michael mentioned the Irish, at one point in time and even to some people today they are not consider white and neither are Jewish people. So when somebody says they like one race espicale to the exclusion of another I always wonder what do they mean. Is it a Social, Biological, what ? I guess it could delve into a whole what is race question
Yeah I mean the whole concept of race is a social construct, to scientists we're all just humans. But I would argue that the only times people articulate who/what they are attracted to is when people like those that @Michael described in the original post get butt-hurt and force them to articulate/describe who/what they like. Most people don't SAY "I only date white guys." They just date white guys (or whatever that means to them). They like who they like.
Agin depending where you are in the world. Russians are for the most part consider Slavic just like a lot of Eastern Europeans and some people still hold those feelings about then not being " white" but rather a type of other,heck you can even throw in Italians into it the whole thing
Am not trying to be a dick and for the most part I don't real care, but that was not an answer, it was more of a polite way of saying drop it. I will but I would add a few things; Race while just a "Social Construct" tells us how to behave and what is acceptable from the way we walk and talk. supposedly the human voice is much higher then we normal talk, but because "Social Constructs" tells us that it should be deeper we automatically with out thinking about make it go deeper. The same thing goes for being gay or for being a women the only things that separates men from women is the ability to have kids. Cause if a women wants to be as masculine as fuck and bulk up she can, they produced all the right hormones or they can buy them. Any way long story short those people that told @Michael his a sellout for wanting to go out or lusting after a white guy are wrong and do need to have few talking cures sessions, but it also goes the same for people who think the other way too. Fuck the rainbow Drool GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY literally
Have you seen short film Sergeant Slaughter, My Big Brother? His role is pretty revealing. It was filmed during his leaner, post-Bronson but pre-Dark Knight Rises days.
You're not hurting anyone. I'm just pointing something out. Refusing to date a specific race and only dating another race definitely tells you a lot about a person. Ask them why they like xyz race and don't like xyz race. They'll probably name some stereotypical character trait or physical trait. So essentially they're applying a stereotype to an entire group of people. The vast majority of whom, they have never met. It's very limiting. So a person can sit there and say they could never ever find even ONE person of xyz race suitable to date based on stereotypes that they've applied to millions, possibly billions of people? Preferences I can understand. Straight out refusal is telling. And being gay and racial limitations are two completely different things. So I'm not even gonna go there.
In my experience, while I have only fucked around with black and mixed, I'm more open to everyone now. Originally I kind of felt like I "had" to date in my race, but that notion has long since vanish due to the limited amount of people out there when you account for compatibility. That's my setback, I find it hard to meet people who I have things in common with, especially black people. Btw, so much politics here. In the end if someone doesn't like you for whatever reason, that's probably not someone you would have wanted in your life anyway.
I had a brief conversation with this multiracial, in-between/slightly feminine Hispanic guy today. He told me he only dates black guys. Out of curiosity, I asked if he's just drawn to them more. He elaborated that he actually finds several types of guys attractive (though he's not into whites), but there's something special about black skin. More interestingly, he said that something about black culture and masculinity appeals to him. I added that there are soft black guys too and he agreed and then we just moved on to other subjects (and a little cuddling). I think many seek the easiest route possible to sexual gratification. If they have always enjoyed certain races or certain characteristics, mannerisms, swagger or personality quirks, they will seek others who they can reasonably expect to exhibit those traits, often leading them to resort to stereotypes. Hence, why I sometimes hear minorities lament when they hear backhanded compliments like, "You're hot for a black guy," or, "I don't usually like black guys but you're an exception," from dudes who generally don't even give black guys a chance. These guys are more open than they realize or project, but just seek what they already know they like rather than trying to do a soul-searching investigation of their personal biases. Most people aren't in the mood for deep introspection when trying to get a nut or get close to someone. And many don't want to discuss that their racial preferences may have been somewhat influenced by a variety of factors such as media portrayals and familial prejudice. My buddy seems drawn to a certain kind of hard, masculine personality that society believes is typically exhibited by many black males, a sort of "hood" persona and image that can be exhibited by anyone but many feel is most easily found in black men. I have a feeling he would be just as into some darker Hispanic dudes or some cool, swagged out white boys. He'd probably be thinking, "Wow, I usually don't like white boys but you're different." Hell, I'm not fem but I'm far from some manly man. If he gets to know me better, he'll likely find that I don't totally exhibit the traits he likes. Maybe he recognizes that I'm not totally masculine but finds me attractive enough anyway; maybe he is projecting those traits onto me due to my race. I'm not bothered as long as he remains respectful and his expectations aren't harmful or hurtful. People in school used to joke about me lying about my home neighborhood presumably because I wasn't hood enough, but this dude doesn't seem to totally boil people down to stereotypes. This is different than the black-preferring Indian dude I met who complimented me with, "You're not like most black guys," and said something about me being more articulate. He had a more problematic set of stereotypical expectations.
Yes man. I definitely see where you're coming from. That's definitely something I thought about. Even if you have a preference for a certain type of dude, that doesn't mean you can't find a dude like that in different races. If a guy likes punk dudes who wear skinny jeans and listen to heavy metal, they may immediately think of a white guy. But I've definitely met Latinos, Asians, or black dudes who are into the same stuff. These racial views are definitely cultivated by the environment around you. And thanks to historical trends, they tend to be skewed in one direction over another.
I do not care what people think about who i date in MY PERSONAL life. My approach to dating is just like my approach to food, I will EAT ANYTHING!!! . I am an equal opportunity dater, I do not see color I only see conquest. Raul Castillo, Richie from HBO's ''Looking'', is one of the guys I would love to get my hands on. He is so beautiful and that smile is sunshine.
Interesting conversation that clearly digressed into rachetness. Whatever. I am thinking about a film, "Lost Boundaries", from the 40's or 50's about a black family that passed for white in a New Hampshire town. Now, I guess the question is, what made them black, birth? Law? What made them white, physical characteristics? Culture? Are there white people in the US who are really black and don't know it? Absolutely. Do I have a problem with R. Dolezal? Kinda. but not really. If she lived as a black woman and worked to TRULY support the black cause, I say leave her alone. Think about this: we.. well sum-a-y'all complain about white people assimilating black culture while still remaining white and maintaing those "benefits". Is that what Dolezal did? What makes a person black? Whose definition are we using? What is race.. versus ethnicity outside of the US? These are questions we need to clearly and factually answer before we stand on our pedestal reciting our moral and ethical convictions about anyone. ijs.
Don't want to beat a dead horse but I hear you, I just don't get it. I like what I like. You like what you like. Who am I to judge or psychoanalyze why you do or don't want to date someone or even a whole group of people? As gay men we should reject all forms of this kind of thinking. We constantly get assumptions that we want to be women, dress up in women's clothing or even molest children just because we're attracted to men. All false assumptions. So why would we make equally false assumptions about someone just because they only date Latinos? or Asians? or White Men? Especially when it affects you in NO WAY WHATSOEVER. Oh, they're limiting their options? So what! More for you then! It's frustrating to see so many gay amateur psychiatrists diagnose dudes with self-loathing disorders based on attraction when they would simultaneously reject a similar diagnosis that homophobic straight people give to them just for being gay (ie: we hate women or we actually want to be women or someone molested us). If we were talking about an employer saying, "I only hire white people." I'm with you all day. But I don't think we can judge/criticize/psychoanalyze people for liking what they like, especially as gay men.
Rachael Dolezal is not a good example. She may have changed her external being to solidify her mental state of identifying with being Black, but that doesn't constitute and confirm that she is a Black woman. Identifying with something doesn't confirm that you are that something. For instance, I'm a Black man. Even if I decide to bleach my skin to change my external being to look Non-Black/African because I mentally identify with being white, I'm still a Black man. It's ok to dress and have a fashion sense that goes with a culture, but Rachael Dolezal took it way too far.
But what makes you black? What makes anyone black? You missed that question? And I think Dolezal is a perfect example. Many blacks have done this to either survive or for a "better" life.
Some things are given and are obvious. I'm 34-year-old gay Black man. 34 because I was born in 1981, gay because I am sexually and physically attracted to the same gender, Black because of my Afrocentric ancestry and I'm a man because of everything that biologically came in my birth package to confirm I am male. I can lie about my age and say I'm 21 to identify with people who are in their 20's right now, I can have sex with women and not be sexually/physically attracted to them and play it like I'm straight, I can say that I'm not Black or anything else even do a Rachael Dolezal, and I can dress up/crossdress and say that I'm a woman; however, It would only cover up or put an eclipse on what really is.
I mostly agree with you @Nick Delmacy and had to change slightly revise my thoughts on this. I hate the phrase, "You do like what you like" because it is inaccurate for everyone. Instead of "You like what you like", I think about the reason/rational behind our choices, which can not always be verbalized clearly. Our tastes.. our preferences are based on our experiences, whether those experiences be very broad/expansive or narrow/restricted or whether those experiences be positive/comforting or negative/traumatic. Some choose to broaden that experience and some choose not- personal choice for aformentioned reasons. So, we can not make generalized comments about people who choose to or not to engage out of their ethnic group/race.
I get it. People like what they like. And you're right, psychoanalyzing might not get us very far. I just don't understand how a person could fit someone's laundry list of dating criteria, but because they're not a specific race, they're automatically eliminated from said person's radar. That just doesn't make sense to me. Especially since many of us have noted, race is a social construct. But I guess people are going to do what they want to do. *kanye shrug*
So, if the origins of all man are in Africa, doesn't everyone essentially have Afrocentric ancestry. What about white people walking around with a black great, great, great, great grandmother? *devil's advocate here..pushing the envelope*
Again, I gotta push back on this whole notion of "choice." In the context of being gay, we would scream that we didn't "choose" who were were attracted to...so its perplexing to me that gay men can't make that leap in this conversation. Especially when I could copy and paste your response verbatim on an anti-gay site and it would be cheered. "There's a reason why these men are gay, there's a rational behind their choice." Just speaking for myself, I do have attractions to certain type of men with certain type of features/attributes that I can not fathom to explain...and I know myself better than any message board commenters. Do I shut out men who don't fit some of these attributes, yup...am I limiting my options, yup...but I'd rather date men I'm into 100% than date men that complete strangers feel that I should be dating just because the visual fits into the boxes that they already understand about who should be with whom.
So, you're saying that you were born with your tastes and attractions? I don't htink they are the same as sexual orientation. To that end, we do CHOOSE to date a particur individual. I do not belive that we choose our attraction. Does that clarify my thoughts abit. Let me clarify. I referred to "choices", not "attraction". We choose to date a particular individual. We really do not choose who we are attracted to. I hear you.. we are on the same page.