Squad Support

Discussion in 'Mental, Medical and Sexual Health' started by DreG, Nov 26, 2015.

  1. DreG

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    My idea was for this thread to be dedicated to helping each other out during tough times.If anyone has a problem one day,or even one that's persisted for a long time,they can post here .You can just say you need help,or tell us what the problem relates to,or eleborate in full.

    My hope is that any of you who come through here will respond to this thread ,or privately ,to anyone seeking help if you feel you have something to offer.
     
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  2. African King

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    You already know what I am going through... First time away from my family on Thanksgiving under these circumstances since I came out to my parents. My dad is actually the only one that has some type of interaction with me. My mom does not even return calls or text messages. It is something else. I sometimes wonder if I will spend Christmas holidays alone in Florida for the first time away from my family in Texas but I am taking it one day at a time. I just need to be strong...

    Thanks for having a huge heart and your continued support!
     
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  3. DreG

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    You'll pull through.This is just evolution.Mabe you can see yourbrother for the holidays.
     
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  4. cypher21

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    This is a great idea Dre!
     
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  5. grownman

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    . It will get better. Just stand in your truth -that's all that matters. That is where you find freedom. I am a Florida boy too.
     
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  6. grownman

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    Great thread. I am sure that I will be a constant on it. Lol. I am not a fan of the holidays because I have a few relative's that passed between thanksgiving to Christmas. But I am a lot better now.
     
  7. DreG

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    Glad you're better.Spring Break always reminds me of my grandma getting cancer(and dying shortly after )so I get it.Being busy around that time helps.You create new memores and your focus is diverted so you aren't free to wallow in the memories and sadness.
     
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  8. African King

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    Oh I am just here for school. I am from Texas but my roots are in Nigeria.
     
  9. grownman

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    Well, as I stated above...I knew I would be coming back. I don't see the need to start a post when this thread was created for this purpose.

    I hate the holidays and my depression issues get bad during this time. I become withdrawn from everybody because I go full force into ASSHOLE mode. Nobody deserves that shit. So, I retreat. This is why I have very few friends because I have pushed a lot of good people away. The one in particular, is my ex of five years, a beautiful and giving man. He treated me like a king and I stomped on his heart. Their have been 2 family deaths within the last 2 years, both were between the months of September and November. But, the worst one is that this month will mark the 21'st anniversary of my dad's passing. But, as I stated in another thread this site along with my immediate family have helped me a lot. I am trying to focus on finishing out this semester and working on me. Thanks for reading.
     
  10. DreG

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    Repeated visits are fine.This thread is so everyone who need someone to listen ,and onyone who can help can make one stop.
    With isolation,even if you seperate from people you know and care about,just be sure to stay attached to something.Keep some type of obligation that will keep you active and in touch with the world on some level.Activity is always the best counter to depression.Find some kind of part time job,charity work,errands to run for an older person.Something that'll make you get up and out,even when you don't want to,the distraction will be good.Once you lose an attachment to the world all together it's even worse.

    With the people you feel like you've wronged or pushed away,you can always try reaching back out.If you're unsure about how to inegrate back into their lives,start with a small gesture.A text,facebook message,a "Happy Holiday" greeting,"how are you doing".Just something small to say I'm here and I'm seeing how you are/showing concern.If you think you can take it,let them express how they felt about how things went down.Sometimes the uncertainty of their thoughts and feelings is worse than actually hearing it.At least hearing it will bring you closure and let the relationship heal.However,if you don't think they'd be open to going forward and working things out don't do this.

    You say your immediate family has been helpful? If you still wanna be reclusive,i say spend time with them.That way you're still in a small circle,can share your feelings of guilt,loneliness and anything else.Plus they'll relate to your grief in more personal way that others may not.
     
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  11. grownman

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    Dre,

    Thank you! I am trying man. Me and my sister are staying together, so it's hard for me to retreat the way I want. I still harbor some resentment towards her for telling one of our cousins about me who spread it. She didn't do it maliciously and I know she didn't. But it still pisses me the fuck off. My immediate family consists of me, mom, stepdad, sis and nephew. We all love each other but my mom's family is from the "ol skool" meaning they don't know how to show affection. She carried that to us. But, she is trying. I give her an "E" for effort. She didn't reject me when I told her over the phone. Some of the pain is left over remnants from family members who found out about me. I hated the gossip and stares when I came around for family functions-so that stopped me.

    I had a straight best friend who I confided in and he was there for me. But, my crazy ass took that as he was into me and I made a move on him. Needless to say it cause some separation on both our parts. I was embarrassed and stopped speaking to him. He was the main person that I talked to and that was gone. We recently met back up about 2 years ago but the chemistry is not the same, plus he is married and living in Georgia.

    Yes sir, you are absolutely right staying active is helping me. I am in school working on my second fucking AA degree (the first one was in Paralegal studies) with the intention of taking it further. Well, you see how that worked out. Anyway, I am back in, yoga and working out have helped. I have not been doing either one lately. But, it helps.

    Dude, thank you. I am trying not to sit here and whine. Lol.
     
    #11 grownman, Dec 7, 2015
    Last edited: Dec 7, 2015
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  12. grownman

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  13. grownman

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    I hit the wrong button.
     
  14. hannibal

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    I've been super stressed lately. Between being on the festival circuit, working for an indie network, and a FULL TIME JOB I have no time to do anything including frequenting here as much as I used to. But I guess I shouldn't complain. Lots of people in the arts aren't busy at all which isn't good.
     
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  15. grownman

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    Wow, what do you do? Are you an actor?
     
  16. DreG

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    You gotta get it out.It's not whining.Glad you've found something that's helping.With the awkwardness with your fam,don't let them know they're effecting you.Since they know,just own it and be proud and don't let anyone disrespect you.
    Hope everything continues to go well.Come back anytime you need to vent.
     
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  17. DreG

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    Yeah,just always remember if you weren't this busy you wouldn't make the progress you want.Weight free time against the possibility of unfulfilled goals.You'll probably still be tired,but it'll give you perspective.
     
  18. grownman

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    So young, yet so much wisdom. Lol. I take the truth in whatever form. Thanks again man.
     
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  19. DreG

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    LOL no prob
     
  20. hannibal

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    No, I'm a writer and right now I have several projects in various phases of production. So I always have to review stuff or rewrite stuff on top of actually going to work lol. But very soon the writing should be able to support me full time.
     
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  21. grownman

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    That was something that I initially started when I went to college after high school. My major was in Communications. Do it. I look forward to seeing your work man. Awesome.
     
  22. hannibal

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    *looks ot make sure Nick and Ocky aren't looking*

    You can see my work here.

    BLACK&SEXY.TV
     
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  23. ColumbusGuy

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    I am on here a lot because I lost my job at the beginning of the year. This is not an easy thing to deal with at my age. I was sick(got it from a coworker) for too long and missed to many days-the last straw being the day I could not come into work because I was coughing up blood. I am still very angry about it since I always did extra things, always came in when they needed someone, even used my own damn money to help out. And I did a damn good job.

    Also last night my 82 year old mother fell and broke her arm. Again! And won't let me come over because she says when it comes to things like this 'I get too bossy and controlling'. So I guess caring is bossy and controlling now. I guess because I want her to get one of those life alert things.

    So I am stressed right now.

    I am trying to keep it together and 'be a man' and all but I have all kinds of emotions boiling inside right now. I don't want to dump too much on anyone I know though.

    *Also most of the other places I am online at are boring as [email protected] right now
     
    #23 ColumbusGuy, Feb 16, 2016
    Last edited: Feb 16, 2016
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  24. grownman

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    Wow. Sorry to hear that. It just so happens that I am out of work currently because of a balance issue. It started out of no where. I am really assholish because of this. This issue is part of the reason for falling face forward. I spoke on this in my status.
     
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  25. grownman

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    We can figure out how we are going to do this
     
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  26. ColumbusGuy

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    It is embarrassing as hell and I did not handle it well when I returned the call from my boss also. Let my emotions get the better of me. I have always had a big problem with authority figures...parents, teachers, bosses, the police, etc that has gotten me in trouble with all of those just listed and this time I let my temper get the better of me.

    Now I am 'on hold' while I wait to see when I am 'permitted' to visit my mother. Master of manipulation( bless her heart). Also a Pollyanna 'I trust in the Lord' type of woman. Calm as a cucumber about the whole thing. I did NOT inherit any of that.

    Thanks for your input @grownman I feel a little less alone about it(the job)now.


    *Thank GAWD I have money saved and I have very low living expenses(from already having to locate from Columbus to 20 miles out in a rural impoverished hell of a place lol.

    Except for student loans from having gone back to school...and fuk that right now.
     
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  27. grownman

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    I see that. Lol. I became more vocal as I got older. Anyway, we got to take it one day at a time- cliché, I know. However still true. Post videos or pics-anything to lit me, you and others up.
     
  28. ColumbusGuy

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    I have always had a big mouth. Being a cancer(emotional I guess) and having a quick temper, being willing to speak my mind, and having contempt for authority figures has not exactly served me well in life.

    handcuffs.jpg
     
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  29. grownman

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  30. ColumbusGuy

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  31. grownman

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    It was me making looking at your hand cuffs. Lol.
     
  32. ColumbusGuy

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    ok lol. We have to stay strong and never ever give up. You never know what life has in store for you. Sometimes you can get a very nice surprise outta life so you have to hang in there. You seem like a very understanding and kind person. There will be good things for you after this difficult time.
     
  33. grownman

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    I agree and that goes for both of us. I am blessed that I only have minor cut's. I get the believe that you are a nice guy as well. Probably often misunderstood.
     
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  34. ColumbusGuy

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    To be honest I have brought on some of my stuff, and my reactons to things beyond my control and poor decisions have exacerbated my predicaments. Sometimes I feel misunderstood, but I don't know sometimes if I am really being misunderstood, or just being an @sshole.


    * I think the total of what, 3 or4 different people responding to this well intentioned, thoughtful thread in over 2 and half months says volumes about whether or not this type of thread is considered useful or not on this particular board. No judgment, just observation.
     
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  35. grownman

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    I KNOW that I have created a lot of what's happening to me. I got to receive it and learn the lesson. That's the way I will be able to move on.
    I know it's sad. I made that a "good pic me up" thread and you, me and Nick were the only ones that responded. Lol. I have to laugh and just accept for what it is.
     
    #35 grownman, Feb 17, 2016
    Last edited: Feb 17, 2016
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