The Relationship Between Your Partner and Your Sibling's Partner

Discussion in 'Dating and Relationships' started by acessential, Jan 27, 2017.

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  1. acessential

    acessential
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    What is/was the relationship between your partner and your sibling's partner like?

    In the western context, the relationship between your spouse and your sibling's spouse isn't as important, but in Tagalog there's a direct kinship word for it: bilas. "My bilas" = My spouse's sibling-in-law. So I guess I'm thinking about this from a different perspective.

    My sister and I are very close in age and relationship. We had a lot of overlapping friends, classes, and experiences growing up. Next week, for the first time ever, my straight sister and her partner are going to meet me and my guy. We'll be doing a little bit of traveling together. My sister has known about me for a while, so she's cool with it. I'm not so sure about her husband. He's from Jamaica and I admit that I have a lot of preconceived notions about Jamaicans and homophobia. (Although I might be the one being judgmental).

    Long story short, this will be a new experience for all of us and I'm not sure if I'm being paranoid or not. Anyone been in a similar situation? Do you and your partner hang out with your siblings and their partners? How did everything go down? If you haven't been in this situation, do you desire to have a positive harmonious relationship?
     
    #1 acessential, Jan 27, 2017
  2. DC.

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    I think it's extremely important to have for one to have a good relationship with their boyfriend's family and of course vice-versa. Now they're are exceptions where that may not always be possible. However, if It can be managed, then I strongly advocate with building close ties with the family of the person your dating (provided it has gotten serious and their family is accepting). For me I actually do envision my other half spending time with my brother and we all kicking it together with my brother being third wheel since he's very accepting. And of course I would want my parents to build a bond with my boyfriend as well. I think having the family unit build with your union allows it to have a stronger structure and support.

    That's why I always say that I would strive to do anything in my power to build with my boyfriend's family. Most people would respond and say "I'm dating them not the family"..... but oh my brethren yes you are. Because if the guy is a part of your life and its getting serious, then the family is also included as well, I believe its a package deal. I even also look at the close ties a guy will have with his family. It says a lot at times as to the overall cumulative nature of their character without having to see anything else. but @acessential I really hope this fares well for you and if you can keep us posted, I'll be optimistic for you!
     
    #2 DC., Jan 28, 2017
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  3. Cyrus-Brooks

    Cyrus-Brooks is a Featured MemberCyrus-Brooks The Black Vulcan
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    This is not important to me since I don't live close to my sister. Her current mate seems cool. I met him during the Christmas holiday. While the subject didn't come up I'm sure she probably told him about me. He has expressed a desire to come and visit. I'm not sure that will be a good idea. Knowing my partner if my sister's bf gets outta pocket he will blast him. My partner don't take any shit from anyone.
     
    #3 Cyrus-Brooks, Jan 29, 2017
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  4. OhSheit

    OhSheit is a Featured MemberOhSheit
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    Since your sister knows about you maybe she picked a guy that doesn't have crazy views about gays if she knows that you will be linking up with you and your partner? I guess let us know how that turns/ed out.

    My sisters partner is in jail rn, never met him. I've hanged with his family through my sister, and they have issues (mainly HIS sister). So that's that.
     
    #4 OhSheit, Jan 31, 2017
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