What Are Your Thoughts on Dating “Busy” Men?

Discussion in 'Dating and Relationships' started by Nick Delmacy, Nov 5, 2018.

  1. Nick Delmacy

    Nick Delmacy is a Verified MemberNick Delmacy Da Architect
    Site Founder The 10000 Daps Club

    Joined:
    Jun 28, 2013
    Messages:
    3,526
    Daps Received:
    11,970
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Atlanta
    Orientation:
    Gay
    Dating:
    Not looking
  2. Mrmack8913

    Supporter

    Age:
    30
    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2017
    Messages:
    30
    Daps Received:
    59
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Charlotte
    Orientation:
    Gay
    Dating:
    Single
    I agree with homie. And this has been argued ad naseum. I used to deal wit dis dude who stayed "busy" and would reply to texts late af. Then I found out he jus smokes and plays PS4 like any other dude. Moral of the story: you always make time for wat u want. And no one can convince me otherwise. If ppl are so damn busy stay to ur busy self and don't engage wit others.
     
    African King, Nick Delmacy and mojoreece dapped this.
  3. RolandG

    Bae Material Squad Leader The 1000 Daps Club Supporter

    Age:
    39
    Joined:
    Oct 11, 2015
    Messages:
    716
    Daps Received:
    2,080
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Georgia
    Dating:
    It's complicated
    Yeah, I don't waste time on dudes who are "too busy" anymore. Why are you even online or a dating app if you know you don't have time to actually date? If you're working three jobs just to make ends meet then you should have self awareness and understand you shouldn't be out in the dating market wasting people's time. The first time a dude tells me he's too busy to simply respond to a text, I delete and move on.
     
  4. Jai

    Jai I'm honing in on my inner freak.
    The 1000 Daps Club Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2015
    Messages:
    872
    Daps Received:
    1,452
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    U.S.
    Orientation:
    Asexual
    Dating:
    Single
    I'm too busy to talk to busy dudes. Although, I'm not took needy I require communication upfront with all in my face. I'll stop fooling with a guy if he's too busy. Men aren't complicated. They make time for what they want.
     
    African King, Nick Delmacy and mojoreece dapped this.
  5. ControlledXaos

    Squad Veteran Most Valuable Player The 1000 Daps Club

    Age:
    43
    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2015
    Messages:
    2,488
    Daps Received:
    6,987
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Atlanna
    You mad, huh?
     
    Nick Delmacy dapped this.
  6. ControlledXaos

    Squad Veteran Most Valuable Player The 1000 Daps Club

    Age:
    43
    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2015
    Messages:
    2,488
    Daps Received:
    6,987
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Atlanna
    I actually get tired of these guys who sits up there and talk about other guys to pander to females IE, Steve Harvey. It's true that people make time for what they want but that's really simplistic. Usually things are more complicated than that.

    I look at it like this if they are busy you can in turn be busy as well. However there should be some middle ground. Also people don't just suddenly become busy If you knew they had things going on at the jump you should plan and expect things accordingly.

    I'm the type who will forget to respond to a text but if you can't deal with a text coming in 5 hours later than oh well. If you text me when I'm driving I may not respond right then but I could accept a call, if one comes in.

    As a person who has hobbies and one who tends to enjoy quiet time, solitude, and planning in advance yes my hobbies may take up more time than you'd like especially if you are not interested in the same things as I am.

    One thing people forget is relationships and dating end up eating into that free time you have to do things other than work, church, working out, school, volunteering, etc. Once you're dating your start slacking off on the working out, the eating right, the book writing etc if you're not careful.

    It's really about finding the balance where you can invest time in your personal goals, hobbies, work, relationship, etc. All of the things that take up time in your day What takes priority when takes time to figure out.
     
    Mrmack8913 dapped this.
  7. Nick Delmacy

    Nick Delmacy is a Verified MemberNick Delmacy Da Architect
    Site Founder The 10000 Daps Club

    Joined:
    Jun 28, 2013
    Messages:
    3,526
    Daps Received:
    11,970
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Atlanta
    Orientation:
    Gay
    Dating:
    Not looking
    I agree with a lot that has already been stated, both in the video and in the comments.

    I just feel like a lot of people act like dating is no different than a hobby or playing a new video game: "I'll get around to it when I have time." Building a relationship with another human being takes time and work. So many people say, "You don't really know the person until after 6 or more months, sometimes longer." Yeah, of course it will take a long time to "know" a person if you spend more time/energy LOOKING for the date than you do actually DATING that person.

    I don't think that means spending every waking moment texting, talking and being with the other person...but if a man's desire is to do all of the things with his free time that he did when he was single, he should just stay single.

    As an entrepreneur and self employed freelancer, my livelihood depends on spending time in to get rewards out. I view dating as the same. If I want to build something with a guy so that he becomes my best friend, my closest confidant and my trusted monogamous sexual partner...At the least, that requires prioritizing him over my PS4 time.

    But what do I know, I'm currently single.
     
    Arthur J, Lancer, African King and 4 others dapped this.
  8. Mrmack8913

    Supporter

    Age:
    30
    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2017
    Messages:
    30
    Daps Received:
    59
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Charlotte
    Orientation:
    Gay
    Dating:
    Single
    Ummm I guess, if you want to put it that way sure. I'm livid lol.
     
    ControlledXaos dapped this.
  9. ControlledXaos

    Squad Veteran Most Valuable Player The 1000 Daps Club

    Age:
    43
    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2015
    Messages:
    2,488
    Daps Received:
    6,987
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Atlanna
    I agree, if you're trying to forge a relationship and a combining of worlds it is going to take some compromise and investment of time that would have gone to gaming or underwater basket weaving. However as horrible as men generally are at communication in relationships (and I admit to being guilty of this at times myself) and expressing their feelings verbally, we need to sometimes accept the inconvenient truth that he's just not that into us. He's not going to tell us that and he'll string us along for a minute to see if the "better" options he's working on come to fruition or we'll be some ICE sex for them.
     
    Lancer dapped this.
  10. RolandG

    Bae Material Squad Leader The 1000 Daps Club Supporter

    Age:
    39
    Joined:
    Oct 11, 2015
    Messages:
    716
    Daps Received:
    2,080
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Georgia
    Dating:
    It's complicated
    I really believe most guys want companionship "sometimes" and not consistently. Very few actually want to date in the sense of spending quality consistent time with one person. As men, if we can get a consistent fuck buddy when we want it and somebody to text every few days, we seem to be fine with that. So it really isn't a matter of guys being too busy as much as guys simply are selfish with their time and don't want to be tied down or feel obligated to share their time and space with another dude simply because the other dude expects him to. I pay attention to how a "busy" guy reacts when I stop reaching out consistently.

    Most of the time, they pretend like it's me who is failing to keep contact when we both know that's not the case. In my opinion, they appear to want to be chased and pursued beyond reason without reciprocating. It's that old feeling of if you want me bad enough, you'll fight through my bullshit to show me how bad you want me. As I've said before, if OBJ or someone like him was reaching out to any of these niggas, I doubt it would take 2 days to get a response from a text or call. IJS
     
    Lancer, OckyDub and Mrmack8913 dapped this.
  11. ControlledXaos

    Squad Veteran Most Valuable Player The 1000 Daps Club

    Age:
    43
    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2015
    Messages:
    2,488
    Daps Received:
    6,987
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Atlanna
    I don't want to be chased. I would like to see if the interest level is the same on both sides. I want to call and be called. Text and be texted. Suggest dates and be invited to a date. I am not gonna put up walls and be with the BS to see what someone will tolerate. That's what playing games is or is part of it It's wasting time time imo.

    I do think guys are happy with Situationships and limit "feelings. " it could work that way for a little while but eventually someones gonna get interested in someone else because that type of thing doesn't really involve investing time, effort or emotions.
     
    Lancer, African King and OckyDub dapped this.
  12. Mrmack8913

    Supporter

    Age:
    30
    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2017
    Messages:
    30
    Daps Received:
    59
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Charlotte
    Orientation:
    Gay
    Dating:
    Single
    I totally agree with all of this! The situationship is replacing traditional dating. It's just funny because u see and hear all the time guys claiming they want consistency. Well if everyone wants that then why are so few giving it? It's so ironic. And to your second point I've been saying for a while gay men love to be chased. They want to be wanted and desired while giving nothing in return. Personally I think its dumb af, if I feel u fuck with me I'll return that same energy, no need for circus tricks.
     
    Infinite_loop and mojoreece dapped this.
  13. OckyDub

    OckyDub is a Verified MemberOckyDub Fair Use Nigga....Fair Use
    Site Founder The 10000 Daps Club

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2015
    Messages:
    6,078
    Daps Received:
    14,041
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    The 4th Dimension Is MINE!
    still valid points nonetheless

    :lawd:
     
    African King dapped this.
  14. African King

    Squad Veteran Most Valuable Player The 1000 Daps Club Supporter

    Age:
    29
    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2015
    Messages:
    1,552
    Daps Received:
    3,475
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Atlanta, Georgia
    Orientation:
    Homosexual
    Dating:
    Single
    I agree with all that was said in the video because there are many people who make excuses. If you don't have the time or the desire to build with someone then spare the other person of their time and feelings.
     
Loading...
Similar Threads - Thoughts Dating “Busy” Forum Date
My 2018 Dating Review and Random Thoughts... Dating and Relationships Feb 5, 2019
THOT THOUGHTS: This New Buff Casual Look For Jidenna Finally Has Me Convinced Thirst Traps Jul 11, 2019
Quick Spoiler Free Thoughts On Jordan Peele’s 'Us' Music and Podcasts Mar 22, 2019
Depression and suicidal thoughts have doubled in young Americans: study Mental, Medical and Sexual Health Mar 17, 2019
Catsuits For Men....Thoughts? Group Discussions Nov 14, 2018

Share This Page

Loading...