What It's Like To Be Gay At A Historically Black University

Discussion in 'Career, Work, Finances and Education' started by Ockydub, Sep 19, 2015.

  1. Ockydub

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    What It's Like To Be Gay At A Historically Black University
    What It's Like To Be Gay At A Historically Black University

     
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  2. African King

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  3. African King

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    Good read. I know that if I had the courage to come out in college that my life would have been COMPLETELY different. I considered attending Howard for undergraduate but anyway..
     
  4. Ockydub

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    Yes/No...I'm contemplating on taking my experiences and writing a book. The post I did write was over 3000 words but still felt like something was missing. I dont know yet what I will do. Right now I'm enjoying self imposed retirement and chilling.
     
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  5. KritiKal Analysis

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    I think that the gay presence at HBCU's is definitely more pronounced now than it was when I was in school. During my time, it was still pretty taboo to be "out." There were a few but those were the ones that you KNEW were so it didn't matter. Now, its cray to see just how many are. Working at an HBCU, I see it all over the place. The odd thing is if you aren't. I think its a liberating thing, but sometimes it can be overwhelming - as it would be with anything in excess.
     
  6. Nick Delmacy

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    I went to a HBCU in Atlanta and being openly back then was unheard of...even at or near Morehouse. It was until around 10 years ago that it became more pronounced and even then it was controversial because the Out men were all flamboyant and wanted to dress like women, the schools even tried to impose dress codes.
     
  7. African King

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    Morehouse does have a dress code actually! When I was living in the Otis Moss Suites in 2011 for my summer fellowship at Morehouse, they have the dress code posted everywhere. I came across flamboyant men but of course they were dressed in a masculine manner. But yeah now you got some guys at Morehouse that want to be AKAs... I don't know why they want that.... lol. I just think maybe they should make their own gay black male frat and not try to impose themselves on a sorority exclusively meant for black women.
     
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  8. African King

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    lol I WISH I could retire but cool that's what's up. I just know that if a book comes out I better get an advance copy with your autograph! ;-)

    Can't wait to learn more about your experiences
     
  9. KritiKal Analysis

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    I completely agree with you on this @Nick Delmacy I believe that we were in school around the same time as we are the same age...I remember the article that came out about the out men at Morehouse. It was called "The Mean Girls of Morehouse." That type of androgyny is common place now.
     
  10. KritiKal Analysis

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    There actually is a gay male frat...it says it is for men of all colors, but I mainly see black guys joining it. It's called Kappa Psi Kappa. I actually learned a little about it when my boy who lives in ATL became a member. I thought he joined my frat, Kappa Kappa Psi, National Honorary Band Fraternity. Then I was like...he wasn't in the band...
     
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  11. African King

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    Yeah I've seen that too. They have chapters in Texas.
     
  12. Nick Delmacy

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    Yeah but there are also more regular gay guys out now as well...I wouldn't go as far as to say that the flamboyant gays made it easier for them to come out, I think its just a sign of the overall changing times. The climate in the world is completely different now than even just 10 years ago when it comes to being gay. I had a blast in college but I do often wonder how different my experience would have been had I been able to be out and gay in school back then.
     
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  13. KritiKal Analysis

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    Honestly, given what I know about you or have gleaned from your posts/conversations, etc, I don't think your experience would have been much different than it was because at your core, you are still Nick. Your actions may have been a bit different, but not so different that it would have changed you from being the man that you are now.
     
  14. Karsh

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    I attended Morehouse in the late 90s/early 2000s and let me tell you...it was a whole different world. The stories I could tell...

    Truth be told, it was pretty open back then if you were gay at Morehouse. The only problems arose when you tried to kick it to a straight guy OR a straight guy got caught up in some DL drama. Things really changed when that kid got assaulted in the shower with a baseball bat in 2002 and the "gay panic" defense started going around. Morehouse started being hypervigilant about their "tolerance" after that.
     
  15. jusrawb

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    My HBCU is/was full of gay people but you only find this out once you meet people that know other people. It's like it's own secret society. Being black and gay going to a HBCU you kind of feel like a outcast at times. It's really just a reflection of the black community at a educational institution. I do have to admit it has become much better though. They did start a lgbt organization and held parties and meetings but I'm not sure of the outcomes. Honestly most likely it was mainly lesbians and flamboyant gay men because the average or masculine gay guy don't get socially involved often. That's a interesting topic in itself; if there was a social space/club/group on campus that catered to the average or masculine gays, who would show up ?
     
  16. questforknowledge

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    I went to Howard for undergrad and I remember the gay culture at my school. It really didn't occur to me until my 2nd year how many guys were actually gay and downlow. I thought for the first year that I was alone, but I later saw that I wasn't. There were of course your flamboyant dudes and probably just as many downlow guys. I didn't feel comfortable coming out to anyone until my senior year of college and it actually worked out for me. I think for the most part being gay was accepted at my campus, but obviously there were some who just didn't like it. There was definitely a gay culture present at Howard and there were a lot of support groups available. Coming out during college definitely can be difficult as this is the time when you are finding out who you are and learning to be comfortable with yourself. But once you do life becomes a little bit more easier after that.
     
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  17. Rah Brown

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    I had the same experience at Morgan State. The gay culture was either DL or loud and flamboyant. Didn't feel total comfortable until my last year.
     
  18. BlackguyExecutive

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    I didn't go to an HBCU, although there are times I wish I had. Both my undergrad and graduate schools were Predominately White Liberal Arts Colleges but I frequented HBCUs. I remember my first time attending a Student Leadership conference hosted by Morehouse and Spelman and too my utter and complete surprise, I was baffled by the openness of black gay male culture at Morehouse. These so call Morehouse men, at least for me were overtly gay, i.e., high instances of flamboyance or secretly on the DL, hitting you up on the sidelines. I was surprised with the level of gall that these men had in approaching me. I ended up travelling to Morehouse later that year for their homecoming events.

    In all, Morehouse was my introduction to Georgia and the Atlanta Metro area.
     
  19. OhSheit

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    I live in NY and never planned on leaving so HBSU's are not an option for me, I do feel for you guys though.
    I guess I have it easy. I attend a four year community college, I don't live on campus and my school is very liberal. Even when I'm chillin on campus there's just no way I can run into my kind. So no friends and college life experience for me, I'm just in and out. The college that I attend is two extremes: one minute I feel like I'm in a cult the next minute I feel like I'm sitting in the middle of a gay pride but somehow they coexist just fine.
     
  20. Quentin

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    They still don't have the dress code imposed at M-house? I thought they did.
     
  21. over-it

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    Nick-D... I had no idea you went to school here. CAU stand up! :salute:
     
  22. over-it

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    I think they did a few years ago. Although institutions of higher education are supposed to be places where young men and women are encouraged to express themselves freely, there should be some parameters in place to keep people from going too far off into the deep end.:reallytho: (no pun intended) :laff:
     
  23. SilverSnake4Life

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    . This wasn't the Project IMHOTEP Fellowship that you did is it @AfricanKing????

    ]
     
  24. SilverSnake4Life

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    So I am not too far removed for my undergrad HBCU experience. I think one of the biggest things I remembered was that there were 3 distinct groups of gay men on campus: one was wrongfully called "Flammers" which were your very feminine, out and proud, gay men. You also of course had your: "DL", typically the athletes who would walk around campus with some girl on their arm, but called you late at night to come to their room.

    Whereas we (cause we had a undercover crew") were the ones that you could never fully say "Yes he's gay"! Like we were well liked by people, involved and held leadership positions in various organizations, members of fraternities, etc. I guess we were "normal" (however you want to define it). The other thing was, at HBCU, there was never a need or desire to have a club specifically for LGBT students (as often seen on PWIs). It was just kind of a unspoken thing where you just had your crew and you all knew about each other, but it never went further than that. But I think that goes with the notion that White gays, want to be seen as different and separated for the masses, but we still want to be seen as a part of the masses.
     
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  25. African King

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    LOL did you do Project IMHOTEP?
     
  26. African King

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    WOW I got accepted there but I was hesistant to go to an all black school at times. I had no clue HBCUs had gay culture. It wasn't til I went to Morehouse in 2011 that I realized how GAY their campus is lmao
     
  27. SilverSnake4Life

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    I did. Summer 2010.
     
  28. African King

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    LOL that is funny that we missed each other by one year!
     
  29. keith

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    ^^^THIS could be said for my experience at Fisk U. Although I think it was only overwhelming for the straight girls who wanted a potential husband or Saturday night date LOL
     
  30. scooter

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    As for my experience it wasn't as hostile as some may believe. Of course you have a few homophobes in the population, but at the end of the day if you love yourself and surround yourself with accepting friends. Than being SGL at an HBCU shouldn't be that much of a bad experience. Some institutions also have SGL orgs that one can join if they are comfortable putting themselves out there like that.
     
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