Some feel that bisexual men are not being true and honest with themselves and are really homosexuals attempting to hold on to the last bastions of their heterosexuality by claiming they still have sexual attractions to women. These observations and assumptions are especially true in the African American community.
But the recent article released by researchers at Northwestern University and published online in the journal Biological Psychology, proves scientifically that bisexual men do exist (break out the torches and pitchforks). For some of us this is no surprise of course but with even this new information and scientific data, you will still have some folks who will push this information aside and hold true to their misguided beliefs…It is either gay or straight and no gray area.
But there is a gray area and it’s contrast is far and wide. Personally for me sexuality is not some rigid object that is put into a container and stored away from inquisitive eyes as to not stir sexual curiosity or as to not be defined by skewed religious ideology (which is why we have some of the issues we have today). It is something that should be discussed and explored with an un-judgmental, non-emotional mind so we can understand and have a better sense of our collective sexual awareness.
Just because I myself am not bisexual, it doesn’t mean bisexuals don’t exist. I feel it would be illogical of me to simply deny that this aspect of our sexual community doesn’t exist simply because I personally can’t identify and conceive of sleeping with both sexes.
There are plenty of masculine bisexual men out there who are not DL, who are not deceiving women and men and spreading diseases to their sexual partners. They are secure with themselves, their sexuality and unapologetic. I must admit I am somewhat envious of these men who exist in this gray area. They can be sexually satisfied with both sexes and also increase their chance for dates on Friday night. LOL…Good for them!
I hope we can get to a point where we can stop assuming that masculine gay / bisexual men are DL and bisexual men are just confused and self delusional. We do need to stop trying to get people to conform to our labels and limitations, just to make ourselves feel comfortable. Hopefully Cypher Avenue can be an instrument for this education and change.
-Octavius
OckyDub
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The only issue I have with the demonization of bisexuals is a semantic one. In my opinion, bisexuals are Gay too. Technically. Even bisexuals themselves will try to separate themselves with Gay saying “I’m not Gay, I’m Bisexual.”
Whatever, pahtnah, you’re Gay too.
I am guilty of this as well, I used to be even more so back in my early 20s. But at the end of the day, its just semantics. True, they’re “technically” bisexual…but c’mon son, they’re Gay.
“Technically” Obama is Biracial….but c’mon son, he’s black.
*Drops Mic*
Yes Bisexuals are “gay” and “straight” However I have mainly dated women and when I say I am bisexual this attitude erases my hetero relationships. Because bisexual men (and women for that matter) are not allowed to have their own identity bisexual men become closeted. Why be out if no one will believe you anyway. Furthermore it is bad advertisement – girls don’t take me seriously if I say I am gay but they will date me if I say I am bisexual.
Thank you for your comments. I have heard other bisexual men make similar point to yours…but sorry I cant have to much sympathy for your because you get the best of both worlds (men and women).LOL
Thanks again
I get where you’re going with the Obama example, Nick. But applying that to your bisexual example is bad logic. Going off what Matt just said, a bisexual person is someone that is neither gay nor straight. They enjoy swimming in both rivers and have no qualms about it. Well, not all of them. But for some reason, the rest of the world does. Kinda crazy. Grey isn’t black or white. It’s a mixture of both. Period.
you cant choose to acknowledge one side without acknowledging the other. that’s the same as allowing some one to call you a thug because youre black or call you a Mexican because you speak Spanish.
I have never understood why some individuals think that Bi-Sexuality is a confused closeted, in denied, DL stage that you experience before totally becoming a full pledge official homosexual.
I cannot speak for other, but for me there can not be anything rather from the truth. Not to date myself, but after sixteen years of marriage to a woman, then eight years of male relationships and now single and the father of five. My love, respect and taste for women/men is still intact. What the scientists found in their study, I have already lived.
My love for men did not remove my love for women. Both have shaped and formed me into a better man today. I count the experiences with them both equally important to the totality of my being and sexual ID. “I am who I am, because I am.”
Fully male, total man, masculinity is my crown, love my guide. In a world where we push for openness and acceptance, let us not close ourselves and become what we oppose.
I salute your staff or just the two of you for sticking your necks out, but remember where there is much risk, there is also much reward. “Do the Damn Thing.” We are watching.
Manhoodis
I am gay. Though I was married at one time, that was not because I was bi-sexual but because I was suppressing my true self. Once I was able to acknowledge to myself I was gay I no longer fooled with women. That being said I think gay people can be so judgmental. I hate how we label people or make them choose a title to make us feel better. Top, bottom, bi, gay, I vote we let people define themselves and mind our own business. It only matters to me when it is someone I am dealing with and even then I can’t force them to choose a label. I dated someone who claimed he was bisexual…. now I felt in my heart he labeled himself “bi” because that was just easier for him to say because he felt it didn’t hold the same stigma as gay. THAT MAN WAS NOT BI-SEXUAL! However if that is how he wanted to define himself I didn’t question it as long as he was faithful to me I didn’t care about his title.
well said Ocky..as usual human nature is to question everything, label everything, making the process so complicated. Simply speaking for the bi-sexual person hats off to him or her. They can love both men and women with no pressure from either one. It is not a choice- it is a fact – bisexuality exists like the USA exists. What is a choice is when they choose to be with a man or woman most of the time. As someone once said .labels are for canned foods..I am what I am and I kow what I am.