This is one of the main misconceptions that bother me the most…Straight men seem overly paranoid about the idea of another man looking at them lustfully. To make it worse, its usually the most unattractive dude in the entire group making the most noise about it. Just as heterosexual men are NOT physically attracted to ALL women, homosexuals are not attracted to all men. And even if a gay guy was attracted to you, just be flattered and appreciate that at least one person out there thinks you look good. Example: When I’m in a club and a group of unattractive, drunk women catcall at me…I just blush, nod, smile, flirt a little and keep it moving.
This is actually true for SOME gay men, hell this is true for some men in general. But the majority of masculine gay men out there lead pretty mundane, average lives in their free time. We go to sportsbars, play video games, watch movies, etc just like everyone else. The stories of gay men spending all of their spare time looking for sex parties, hookups and male escorts for a “massage” are mostly fiction. Many of the gay men I know who are not in relationships don’t have much sex at all actually. Well, no more than the average heterosexual man.
You wouldn’t believe how many times I’ve heard this…mainly from feminine men. They say, “You need to just be yourself.” Like being gay means you’re incapable of also being masculine. Then there’s the straight people that assume you must be “hiding” if you’re masculine. To them, being masculine is a constant, exhaustive pretend-act just to hide your homosexuality from them, getting personally betrayed if they find out that you were gay all along. Here’s what I say to them: First of all, Masculinity is natural for most of us just as it is for you. Secondly, unless I want to have sex with you, the fact that I’m gay is none of your fucking business.
I have a big family and lots of friends and I know I’m not the only gay man in either group. Its statistically impossible for me to be…recent studies suggest that in the Western World, 2-13% of men are Gay, Bisexual or at least have had one sexual experience with another guy in their lifetime. So that means if you’re in a room with 10 of your male family/friends, chances are at least one of them likes cock.
This could not be farther from the truth. Especially if you consider the stats listed above. In a team of 20 players, odds are at least 2 of them are gay/bisexual. Besides, at the end of the day we’re men…men with testosterone. The need to compete is embedded within our DNA. Essentially, its only natural for us to not only be interested in sports but to also play them. The photo above features players in the National Gay Flag Football League and the Logo reality series, “Shirts and Skins” featured players in the National Gay Basketball Association. But don’t get me wrong though: There are many gay men that just pretend to be into sports to look at the men.
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Nick Delmacy
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Absolutely PERFECT! Kudos to you my friend.
Double dat Baby! Good job
LOL at this entire post….and it’s only funny because it’s SO DAMN TRUE!!!!! Good one!
Wow.
This is pretty bad.
Nick, you seem to want to make some sort of distinction between ‘you’ (who I guess you consider ‘masculine’) and ‘a feminine gay man.’
All you’ve succeeded in doing here is revealing your own insecurities. Both about your own sexuality, and with women. And feminiinity.
And for the record, a homophobe could care less if your masculine or feminine, bro. They’d still burn you alive if given half a chance.
A bit embarrassed for you that you do not see this, mate.
You’ve got a lot of personal growth ahead of you. I hope you undertake that work, as your writing is interesting, but reveals a man deeply insecure about himself.
I see your psycho analysis; however I don’t any examples to support what the hell you’re talking about.
I don’t bother engaging with passerby commenters…if they aren’t Cypher Avenue members, they don’t warrant a response.
Yo I couldn’t agree more
I couldn’t agree more. Spoken like a pro