The 2019 Judgement-Free New Year's Resolutions Thread

Discussion in 'Group Discussions' started by Nick Delmacy, Dec 27, 2018.

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  1. Nick Delmacy

    Nick Delmacy is a Verified MemberNick Delmacy Da Architect
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    Here's a thread for Squad Members to post their New Year's Resolutions without judgement. Yes, we all have made resolutions in the past that have been broken or forgotten about less than a week after January 1st, that doesn't mean we shouldn't still aim for self improvement.

    This is NOT a thread for judgment or rants about Resolutions being a waste of time or recycled memes about how full the Gyms will be on January 1st..

    This IS a thread for motivation and support for any and all ways we want to improve ourselves going forward in 2019.

    We're all a work in progress. No one has a perfect life. And everyone has made mistakes in the past, but we're all still alive so that means we can make sure those mistakes never happen again. Saw this posted online and it felt appropriate:

    Photo Dec 27, 2 10 35 PM.jpg
     
  2. Jai

    Jai Being strong minded.
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    I was hoping I would get to judge someone harshly...Ughhh!!!


    Oh, I mean this year is going to be something. Something good and rich for me. I'm already skinty but I think I'd take up kickboxing, be more outgoing with other humans, have a lot of safe sex and I want to go on cruise...Can I add in writing my job when I finally nail the contract I want or nah?

    2019 is gonna be a great year.
     
  3. Winston Smith

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    1. Restart intermittent fasting; used to do it years ago before it had a name and was a thing. Fasted today, was like old times, I think I can do this (note to @SB3 news said some Ebola patients escaped ... they’re looking for Popeyes).

    2. Be less judgmental more active listening, here at CA and elsewhere

    3. Launch my businesses which have been on paper for a decade

    4. Travel more, even if just weekend car trips

    5. Cook at home way more
     
  4. ControlledXaos

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    1. Lose weight/eat better.

    I am definitely one who has no problem with the working out, but just really struggle with eating better. Since I basically float between a +/-7 lb zone, food is what's keeping me held back from my aesthetic goals. Which leads me to ....

    2. Work on being more confident.

    I have tied this to my physical appearance. I feel like if I were in better shape this would come hand in hand. Since I want to cosplay at Dragoncon 2019 and I've selected a pretty body conscious character, I really need 1 to come into fruition.

    3. Be more social.

    I rarely go to clubs events and festivals. I need to so I can meet people organically. Gay men make it hard to become platonic friends but I definitely won't find that on Jacadam'dr.

    4. Try new things

    I tend to get into a rut. I play my video games and I'm content. But relating to 3 trying new stuff should expose me to people who may have similar interests to me.

    5. Work on my finances.

    Definitely need to save more money and pay off my CCs. I think my retirement auto set up is fine but it's definitely anxiety inducing when trying to get your money straight and not feel like you have to eat rice and tortillas.
     
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  5. BlackguyExecutive

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    I have a few resolutions.

    1) I need to be a more consistent friend and keep my commitments. I have been real flakey this year and way less social. I think part of it is that I am in this weird space since leaving a dream job and being disconnected from the US.

    2) I want to remake my apartment to be more adult-like. I just want my living space to feel like two adult men live there. Right now, its a mix between part fraternity house, part diplomat quarters, part "millennials live here."

    3) I want to work a bit on fitness.

    4) I want to downsize my wardrobe and declutter.

    5) I want to be okay with not pursuing a PhD. Right now, I am slugging through it without passion and its draining but its been a bucket list goal.

    6) I need to be a more present husband.

    7) Take that trip to Argentina. Start planning now!
     
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  6. Franky

    Franky Dreamer by day, Dreamer by night

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    I guess my resolution would be to check a few more items off my bucket list in 2019. A few of these items include:

    1. Attend the Sundance Film Festival.

    2. Get one of my screenplays "optioned" by a studio.

    3. Go storm chasing (I know, right?) Tornados intrigue the hell out of me.

    4. Ride in a hot air balloon.

    5. Do more volunteer work.
     
  7. Apollo

    Apollo Enemy of the Status Quo

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    1. Be more consistent with my diet. A low carb diet works pretty good for me. And do some days of intermittent fasting.

    2. Be more consistent with going to the gym. Some weeks I'm really good with going, than other weeks, not so much.

    3. Try to re-fill my savings account. I had to use some of it in the past few years.

    4. Get out more and be more social. Try to go to new places and meet some new cool people.

    5. Look into part-time evening graduate school.

    6. Maybe join a softball league again. If I'm able to find a cool team around.
     
  8. Nick Delmacy

    Nick Delmacy is a Verified MemberNick Delmacy Da Architect
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    1) The usual health & fitness stuff.

    Eating better and working out. I have to start treating the gym as if it were a job (go everyday and don't be late). My much younger sibling was diagnosed with high blood pressure and now has to take a pill daily :shock:. That was a wake up call on how lucky I have been with my health and that I should be even more serious about it as a man over 40 years old.

    2) Work on my personal career goals in my free time more, instead of just binge-watching shows and movies.

    I love Film & TV like a drug...but I want to retire by 50 years old or at least have enough money saved so that if I wanted to, I could. That will only happen in my field by becoming a boss, not just remaining a freelancer. So that means doing a LOT of work in my free time to make that happen.

    3) Be less vocally cynical and negative.

    I'm always going to be opinionated, but being so critical of trash media content (movies, TV and music) is getting exhausting. Plus, no one remembers all the times I praised things that I like, they only remember the times I didn't like something they loved. Then I come across as an overall negative person or like I think I'm better than others, which is not how I want to be perceived. That leads into:

    4) Be more um, patient, when dating.

    For some reason the men I choose don't last long. Most of the time it's because I've gotten impatient with them and so I just ghosted....or I found a personality quirk that bothered me and so I just ghosted....or I see them on an app or house party and mentally accuse them of being whores in my head before I even meet them and so I just ghosted.

    5) Improve wardrobe.

    I don't have a inherent fashion sense like a lot of other people. Especially when it comes to clothing other than jeans, sneakers and T-shirts. I don't own a single "flyy-ass" suit or really any business casual clothing to wear to business networking events or "adult" gatherings (35 and up). My wardrobe looks the same as it did in college, just updated for the times.

    6) Make new, more compatible friends.

    I don't want to become a friend collector, but I need a new supply on deck. I've become increasingly disconnected from the friends that I have (mostly straight black guys from college) to the point where I've wondered why we are even friends at all. And in a city as active as Atlanta, many of my gay friends here don't actually like to do anything anymore. I used to joke about the whole Noah's Arc thing, but as I've gotten older I've seen the value of those kinds of friendships, even if just to be surrogates for companionship.
     
  9. Omega Level

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    • Read more and exercise my brain more often, puzzles etc.
    • Update my style to be more contemporary while still reflecting my age and personality.
    • Be a more giving person even in my moments of lack. A monthly thing.
    • Have less casual/meaningless sex and be open to more substantial connections.
    • Commit myself to focus on what is going right in my life and only be interested in good news/energy.
    • Proactive Healthcare in my Mind, Body, Soul.
     
    #9 Omega Level, Dec 30, 2018
    Last edited: Dec 30, 2018
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  10. Nick Delmacy

    Nick Delmacy is a Verified MemberNick Delmacy Da Architect
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    7) START SAYING "NO" MORE!

    I always try to be the "nice guy" and end up saying Yes to doing favors and side projects (ie: reading and giving notes on someone's 150 page screenplay) that I don't want to do, which ends up biting me on the ass later (ie: up late nights to get it done for them). I need to just say No and move on.

    Oprah touched on this subject in the past:

     
  11. machoBLKnerd

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    1. stop living in the past, including visiting old dates' fb and instagram pages. #theyhotthough

    2. forgive my parents and rekindle a relationship with my dad

    3. pray more
     
    #11 machoBLKnerd, Dec 30, 2018
    Last edited: Dec 30, 2018
  12. Winston Smith

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    Yes, that is the beginning of wisdom, for a number of reasons (I was burning that bridge years before you probably reached it) and learned the hard way. It is especially important if you are seriously trying to be an entrepreneur. That’s a tldr subject but it’s knowing when to say no is vital when trying to commercially interact with other black folk or one’s friends and relatives (of any race).

    EVERYTHING you take on should be a) in writing b) properly budgeted; budgeting includes properly treating your own personal time and resources from a supply chain management perspective no matter how big or small your side hussle.
     
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  13. Winston Smith

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    Also big on my list for 2019: Cleaning out my “Wokeness” closets and attic and having a Keeping It 100 Cognitive yard sale.

    The influence of social media and the Internet has turned my thinking into stupid “The Root” territory at times. Woke Negroes can’t see that, many times, they are just chocolate-coated Trumps, racially dismissing the contributions of whites or black independents, etc. because of some fucked up, historically uninformed idea of black history and intellectual thought.

    When a friend pointed out that negroes who cross their arms and scream “Wakanda Forever” are just unconscious black fascists who support an imaginary kingdom that is EXACTLY what Trump wants America to be in real life (closed, walled, isolationist, uninvolved in international affairs and trade, one family rule, etc) I had to laugh at the dumb shit that black folks, myself included, wrap ourselves in.

    Or as Curtis Mayfield put it: “Give this some thought / in stupidness we’ve all been caught”
     
  14. Artistic Arsonist

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    1. Find work in an animation studio, whether that be in LA, Atlanta, or wherever.
    2. Be more social, both online and in person.
    3. Become more at ease with failing and not having it all together.
     
  15. SB3

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    My 'only' resolution is to work on my procrastination. It has been a lifelong problem, and it bleeds into so many lanes in my life, too often leading to indifference and a lack of results. Learning how to 'do/get it done now' could lead to a lot of positives.
     
  16. BlackguyExecutive

    BlackguyExecutive Je suis diplomate
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    YES! Forgiveness is powerful. Particularly with oneself. I came across this piece of advice that was on the wall of a friends psychologist office it said, "You can't hate yourself into a version of yourself you will love. My mind was blown after that. Forgiveness is about more than letting the other person(s) move forward. It frees yourself to move forward as well.
     
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