The Long Distance Vibe

Discussion in 'Dating and Relationships' started by LeMignon, Jan 7, 2020.

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  1. LeMignon

    LeMignon Your Favorite Nephew
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    Long story short - I met this guy at a work conference and we hit it off. He lives in DC. I live in Dallas. I've never been in a long distance relationship. In fact, I've only ever been in one relationship. I'm young and trying to date. In the short time we've been in contact, he's sparked feelings that I haven't felt in a long time. The continuing Google Duo calls and hour long conversations are steady keeping that fire going. But I know there are challenges to long distance.

    Can anyone provide insight on long distance relationships? What's your experience, whether successful or not?
     
  2. jpo

    jpo
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    I was in a long distance relationship for seven years. It was not a good experience. But looking back I realize that it probably would not have been any better had we been in the same place. Distance was not the problem - in fact it is probably the reason it lasted (dragged on?) for as long as it did. My guess is it probably is easier to work out now - back then there was this thing called long distance telephone calls, and the cost a lot - not a problem for me, but for him he always kept track of the dollars running up the longer we talked.
     
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  3. LeMignon

    LeMignon Your Favorite Nephew
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    Ok I gotchu. So, it dragged on because of the distance and the expense was the straw that broke the camel’s back for him... Yeah, we like each other, but we both feel the long distance is not ideal. So, it’ll likely just be a friends with benefits situation while we’re visiting each other’s cities, if we happened to be single and in the same place.

    I also feel like this question/thread has been done before. I can find out more if I look hard enough. But thanks.
     
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  4. jpo

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    Or, it could have been the moment he said "when we're apart I really love you, when we're together I realize I don't like you." That had the ring of finality.
     
  5. Nick Delmacy

    Nick Delmacy is a Verified MemberNick Delmacy Da Architect
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    I've never had a long distance thing, but I've tried a couple times. Usually fizzles out after the first few weeks. Hard thing is communication. Either myself or the other person isn't the Facetiming and talking everyday type, so we end up texting-only which leads to a lot of messages un-replied to for long periods of time.
     
  6. takeyourmeds91

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    Is that Android? Whew, the ghetto....haha jk. But my first and only two serious relationships were long-distance. The first was 2 years, the second like 8-9 months. It was tolerable when I was younger but I was also lucky enough to have relatively easier access to them than you do, currently.

    Even just being a few years older, my tolerance for it has quickly declined. I don't mind starting off that way or even having it woven into our relationship due to careers but we need to have a gameplan. I'm not doing long-distance indefinitely with a to-be-determined cessation date.

    If he has no plans of moving anytime soon and neither do you, I'd think a little harder about pursuing it further. It sucks when you find that connection with someone and unfortunately, I feel like it's becoming a lot more common to end up in situations like these. But shit, what did Erykah Badu say? "I guess, I'll see you next lifetime." lmao


    To your previous point, it definitely does slow down the process of understanding if you are truly compatible so there is a level of risk. And that was a bold ass but real ass statement lmao. That sounds like something I would say.
     
  7. LeMignon

    LeMignon Your Favorite Nephew
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    Lmao I have an iPhone. This nigga got an Android and been tryna get me to switch! Lol but I get what you’re saying... It does suck to bond with someone and the distance get in the way.
     
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