Does Porn Kill Love???

Hey,

I do think porn makes sex seem unrealistic based on what I've heard here on the Boards. Everything from penis size to what a top or bottom should or shouldn't be it makes people create a lot of misconceptions that could make it difficult for inexperienced people to enjoy sex.

I'm sure once you get in the swing of things you figure things out pretty quickly but it still does damage. For me though I'm not sure if porn keeps you from forming emotional connections, I think that maybe an individual-based factor.

Great question!

 

When I think of Porn Kills Love, I think of that statement meaning how it can become addictive to be point that sex is the only thing that's important to you. When you are watching porn at that point, it's definitely a problem. And that problem can go beyond having a relationship. It can affect all other aspects of your life.

Porn is a great vice for all of us for the sake of sexual entertainment and gratification. But if not balanced and controlled, it can have its disadvantages.

 

I dont rly know what to make of that question. Maybe theyre relating it to how many gay men are content w sex over love? Im confused

 

Well I don't know if it does, but I've really didn't have that many actual physical sexual experiences with other people. I didn't start having sex until last year at 26 and I'm not 27 (I've never been approached by people in general; #MyLife). So my only friend for all of these years includes Nubian 101, many of the 'tube' channels, XTube, Taggaz and DawgpoundUSA, and now currently MyVidster and Tumblr when I don't feel like scrolling through a video.

 

Funny you created this thread. I have been thinking a lot porn addiction and its side-effects on "love" and intimacy for the past few weeks. A friend suggested that I read Out of the Shadows:Understanding sexual addictions by Patrick Carnes. From that book, it sounds like there are two chemicals that released(different from men and women) during sexual intimacy to strengthen the bonds of relationships. It turns out those chemicals don't get released during a hook-up(that's why most of us are not about that life), but are release when watching porn. Essentially, porn usage can evolve to trick our minds into believing that we have intimacy when we don't. Hence, the apathy towards relationships and the "I got myvidster/pornhub for that " attitude.

 

Coincidently We briefly discuss this in the new podcast. Recorded it weeks ago tho so we don't really go into it a lot. Porn def helps to not give AF abt being obsessed with dating and all that. But it also can prevent one from getting out there and meeting people to replace the need for porn.

 

Porn does not kill love people inability to form emotional and physical attachment does; the only thing porn does is give the viewer another outlet to engage there sexuality and desire

 

I think a small minority may be content with releasing some tension on their own, but many more use it as a temporary solution. I think some may watch excessively because, for various reasons, it's their easiest outlet to experiencing some degree of gay sex. Maybe they live in a small town or are insecure or fear approaching guys or just don't have any prospects at a particular moment. For them, that tension release won't fulfill a desire for a greater connection. And it's unrealistic in the sense that, while it is possible that some guys may pound/get pounded for 20+ minutes, it's harder for most to do in real life than in an edited production.

I don't think porn can kill love. It could be part of a larger problem like sex addiction, unrealistic expectations, or tunnel vision focused on chiseled, porn star bodies, but porn doesn't create these. I hear more about porn killing sexual potence (what's the proper term for the opposite of impotence?), though that may be more closely linked to excessive masturbation.

 

I'm currently on a purge called NoFap, which basically entails no porn, masturbating, or orgasm for 90 days if you can make it. I must say that since I stopped jacking off to DawgPound USA and its relatives, I have noticed a difference in not only the way I interact with men, but how I see them. I see them as a fellow multidimensional human being with thought processes just as complicated as mine, and less of a release for my sexual urges. (I was one hell of an "objectifier", no lie). Porn was a nightly ritual for me for YEARS. It got to the point where I couldn't sleep without an aching orgasm and blotchy vision from staring into the MyVidster app.

I could honestly go on forever about this NoFap phenomenon, but I'm sleepy AF so naw.....Google it. Lol

 

To me, porn and love are two separate things. As long as porn doesn't keep you from trying to form or get in the way of a healthy sexual relationship it should be fine.

I think porn has its purpose. The thing now is that it's so easy to obtain with the Internet. You don't have to go to the shady side of town to the store with no windows where everybody backs their cars in so you can't read the tag. It's so accessible now and that leads to a lot of variety. I remember have tapes and DVDs and watching the same scene can only do so much so many times. Now you can never watch the same thing twice if you don't want and everything is so categorized so you don't have to look for Alien Bareback Furry Prison 5: Blatino Escape in the bottom of the DVD bins.

All that to say that there's easier access and variety so I think that means more people are watching porn who wouldn't have before in many ways that were not always available.

And imo it's better for a person to jack off than to go out and hookup and cheat if they are in a relationship, I happily would choose the lesser of the evils in this case.

 

I'd watch that. Not to get off, but to see how ridiculous it gets. Sounds like a XXX, z-level Syfy movie. It could be like Leprechaun 4: In Space combined with Leprechaun in the Hood, or these could be educated Blatinos in tight, form-fitting business attire, abducted while on their way home from their office jobs.