An Open Letter to Black, Straight Men

Discussion in 'LGBT News and Events' started by OckyDub, Jul 13, 2016.

  1. OckyDub

    OckyDub is a Verified MemberOckyDub I gave the Loc'ness monstah about $3.50
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    Dear My Heterosexual Brothers,

    I want to first say: I am gay. I know when I speak with you, generally, you don't think that matters from me: I know I look a little "less gay" than the normal guy, but I am openly and exceptionally gay. Let's get that out the way. Also, I know it's difficult for you but please let's drop religion for a moment. I can already hear you saying you can't, but I have seen you at the club dancing and lusting over women. I have seen you eat all kind of forbidden things. And speaking of forbidden: I've seen videos of you and yo girl getting it on while she's on her cycle. Fights on Facebook, drug dealing, pill popping, etc. I, personally, don't feel like my life as a gay man is a sin and I am not here to judge you, but I am just trying to put you in the mind frame of sitting outside of religion for awhile. That's it.

    So, let's kind of start to have the conversation I am here for. This past week has been hell. To watch my brothers die by police was awful and heartwrenching. I have two brothers in pretty deep with the criminal system. One of them will be in jail for the rest of his life on account of a criminal history and a bad lawyer. The other barely missed death from 9 bullets going in his body. Gratefully, he only has to take a pill for a day after being in the hospital that year for 11 months and lives a reasonably normal life. Yeah, I know it's a miracle, a miracle indeed. So, I know pretty close-up how police brutality and criminalization looks up close.

    I, myself, have experienced some issues with police. But this isn't about me. This is about you.

    Deray Mckesson, if you didn't know, is a prominent #BlackLivesMatter activist. He is from Baltimore and pretty much headed the mobilization of the Baltimore area during the Freddie Gray era. He also ran for mayor of Baltimore. He's a real stand-up guy.

    Just so we can go chronologically: a couple weeks ago there was a massacre in Orlando at a gay club called Pulse. 49 people died, over 50 others were hurt. This is important because a lot of you said nothing-- or at least nothing good-- about this.

    This past week we know there were several instances of death by police of Black men. The media's attention started generally with the execution by police of a man named Alton Sterling. And then, last night, DeRay (while standing for Black men protesting in Baton Rouge) was put in jail.

    And these were some things I read on social media:

    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
    This the type of shit I see, bro.

    Let me explain a couple things. First, sexuality ain't got nothing to do with people following me or any leader in the LGBT movement. I would even go so far and say if it wasn't for LGBT people, there wouldn't be a movement. If you didn't know, lesbians started Black Lives Matter. And, in most major cities, the local affiliations are ran by LGBT people. You know why this is? It's simple: yall didn't step up. Second, I don't know when my "movement" was different than yours. I'm black. We're black. Pause. And us magical people in the LGBT community are just as disenfranchised as you. I would even go further to say that although the LGBT community has its own demons, you probably could take some lessons from their movement because honestly it has gotten further in the last 50 years or so than we have in the last 400. So, why you so mad?

    I am not trying to be disrespectful, I actually have recently gotten interested in working more with you. I guess you can say I am becoming "woke" over night as I watch my people die. Know this: us gays bring a lot to the table. We bring more than this stereotypical and/or honest design aesthetic, style, dance ability or creative insight to make your girlfriend leave you alone for hours. We are fucking magical. And we are your brothers. We aren't trying to walk in front of you, we want to walk on the side of you. BUT if you don't get your ass up or start to realize we are your equals, we will be leaving you behind to save you in hopes of saving ourselves. Don't let your demons cast me to hell when my work is keeping you alive.

    Best regards,

    An Unapologetic Black Gay Man

    Ian Haddock
     
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  2. ControlledXaos

    Squad Veteran Most Valuable Player The 1000 Daps Club

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    " I would even go further to say that although the LGBT community has its own demons, you probably could take some lessons from their movement because honestly it has gotten further in the last 50 years or so than we have in the last 400. So, why you so mad?"

    [​IMG]

    The number of straight men whose feelings just got hurt here, but are too proud to admit it, will never be accurately determined.
     
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  3. OckyDub

    OckyDub is a Verified MemberOckyDub I gave the Loc'ness monstah about $3.50
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    Although I agree, and marriage rights are important; this benefits white gays and puts them on more equal footing with heterosexual whites. Since then their focus has been on transgenders and just as before marriage equality, focus on LGBT racism and white supremacy at large is minuscule.
     
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  4. ColumbusGuy

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    This was the part I copied and was going to discuss(the part you responded to that @ControlledXaos posted which stuck out to me as well). I don't think it has gone further in the last 50 years than blacks have in the last 400 years(that is really stretching it but I get the point trying to be made). But also what you mentioned as well-the gains made by gays have not been equally distributed-white gays have pretty much dropped the ball in this regard and for all non-whites as well as 'white gays who do not fit the gay agenda/narrative/poor or working class white gays'-who may matter-but just 'not as much'.

    And despite this the 'LGBT/etc' movement has done a lot, especially given the destruction of much of the leadership by AIDS and having to deal with that and then get back on track with other issues. Goals seem to be set, and then met. First decriminalization and basic safety, then other issues leading up to gays in the military, adoption issues, gay marriage. etc.

    Who would have thought 25 years ago we would have gay marriage? There is a setting of goals and a relentless pushing of boundaries and creating allies that has been very successful and can be emulated or at least studied to see what worked/works and what can be applied to different situations. I think much of the learning that the gays have done has been from the Civil Rights movements for blacks here and from international decolonization movements. And not that I agree that everything 'accomplished' has necessarily been a good thing as the 'movement' has also perpetuated stereotypes as we all know, etc.-have to acknowledge that as also one of those 'demons'.
     
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  5. ControlledXaos

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    This. This is why I call the Human Rights Campaign "Homosexual Rich Caucasians".

    There's definitely some strides made as it goes to gay rights but I think the the non queer gays, gays of color, etc who don't fit that "NYC Chelsea style" of gay have not benefited much. Sure there's marriage which is good. However while I can't say right now exactly what I'd want or think the hrc could do for the non mainstream gays, I don't think they are actually looking for suggestions either.
     
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