Checkout FAIL!

Discussion in 'Group Discussions' started by Lancer, Oct 29, 2018.

  1. Lancer

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    So last week I was coming back after a long day and decided to pick up some items at the store, nothing much as I had already done the monthly stock up a week before. I stand at the checkout line waiting my turn, then I notice one of the male attendants that had his back to me. He looked very good from behind, his work pants were the right fit. In my mind I was thinking, should I?
    I was unsure cos my summer was fucking dry #kalahari, none of the guys I hit on were interested, even dudes that took my number never hit me up so I was not going to get rejected at a supermarket and walk out into the blistering cold.
    ( even if its not that cold yet, after a rejection it will sure feel like it lol)
    [​IMG]
    So, I said if he turns around and he is cute, I will holla, no excuses! Unknown to me, the Devil was out that day to steal what was left of my self esteem, because homeboy was fine. His line clears and he signals me to come up;
    Me: Hi, just these please.
    Him: okay
    Me: How is your day going? (nervously, but hiding it)
    Him: It's going good.
    Me: What's your name?
    Him:*leans in so I can read his name Tag*
    I don't know if it was cos I was so nervous, but I couldn't read his name. The words did not just make sense to me, and I was wearing my glasses. lmao
    Me: I can't read it sorry...
    Him: *while bagging my stuff* Ok, I will come closer.
    Me: Oh, now I can see it. Nice name.
    While he is trying to run my card, I get a piece of paper out my wallet. Tear it in half, then write my name and number on it. Then put the other half back in my wallet. He hands me back my card and as I am leaving, I slip him the paper. He smiles, and I say goodbye.
    Phew! That wasn't so bad, I think to myself, nice job. I get home, put my stuff down, then I open my wallet to throw away the other piece of paper. I pull it out and it had my name and number on it.
    [​IMG]
    In all my nervousness, I had given homeboy the blank paper, DAMN!!!
    I am SO done, no more hitting on guys in 2018, I am off my game and need to hibernate.
     
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  2. ControlledXaos

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  3. Artistic Arsonist

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    C7NzCoiXgAE-PkA-920x585.jpg

    LOSER!



    But I mean, at least he was interested so small vctory?
     
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  4. African King

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    DAMN BRO NOOOOOOOOO
     
  5. Winston Smith

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    The nice thing is you know where he works...SO, the beginning of soon-to-be romantic comedy starring Lancer?

    [​IMG]
     
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  6. ControlledXaos

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    Pretty much. Just go back with the other piece of paper.
     
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  7. Winston Smith

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    Yep. If it blossoms into something, Lancer and dude will have a cute “You’ll never believe how we met” stories.

    Lancer, you could even given him a mock store coupon with your number on it that says good for “No Exasperation Date” on it (to make up for the paper slip)

    Sorry, corny, I know, I’m in a narrative mood. Just trying to get these young’uns together....
     
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  8. Lancer

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    I thought of that, but it would be so awkward and I think I would look desperate.
     
  9. ControlledXaos

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    You better reload that gun and shoot that second shot.

     
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  10. Winston Smith

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    Omg lol. Look, if you DONT go back you look like a jerk (“Man, he played me, damn blank paper”). This way, you get to look like a bumbling but cute klutz. It gives you a second opportunity to impress.

    “I just thought you such a nice dude I got mixed up ha ha. Now this is my real number, see? I’d really like a chance to show you I can actually walk and chew gum at the same time...in Aisle 3 where the candy’s at.” (Slight laugh)

    If you think you’ll freeze up, @ControlledXaos and I will be in the next aisle over whispering lines to you, Cyrano De Bergerac style

    (I tell you folks this stuff writes itself)
     
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  11. Infinite_loop

    Infinite_loop Is this thing on?
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    oh come on bruv! dont walk out of this one lol it's served to you on a platter.

    you better go back and give this fine ass man your digits
     
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  12. alton

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    LMFAO!!! This is EXACTLY what played in my mind, bro!!!!
     
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  13. Lancer

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    lol, I would try but, I would wait for like a week before I go back.
     
  14. Lancer

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    Okay, I would. However, I don't have high hopes, cos I have had many situations like this, this year and zilch!
     
  15. Lancer

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    Honestly, going after guys which I have always done, and I think will always do, has been exhausting. I have been turned down SO much this year I need a breather.
    [​IMG]
    My heart: Next year I plan on drastically reducing my going after guys and letting them come to me. Lawd help me, with that, as I am not classically handsome. lol
    My head:
     
  16. Winston Smith

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    And yet one dude took your number (or reasonable facsimile) so...CHANCE!

    If “classically handsome” was a requirement for getting laid, I’d be going door to door right now with Watchtower and Awake copies, asking people if they’d like something to read. Stop making Nick Delmacy type excuses (lol)
     
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  17. bpaisle

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    tumblr_mpbs6y5cWt1qdq3h2o1_1280.gif
    Bruh. You had one job.
     
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