HIV DATING

Discussion in 'Mental, Medical and Sexual Health' started by grownman, Jan 16, 2016.

  1. grownman

    The 100 Daps Club Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 26, 2015
    Messages:
    935
    Daps Received:
    1,201
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    fl
    Orientation:
    Gay
    Dating:
    Not looking
    Good afternoon guys,

    So, I was on YouTube earlier this morning viewing videos on mental health. I saw a video in the recommended section to the right that caught my attention. This young Hispanic looking guy (cute lil thing) was talking about his HIV status and dating. He met a guy that also had HIV+ so no problem on that front. The guy was closeted about his status and sexuality. He wanted the two of them to keep it discreet.

    What are your thoughts on this? Are you open minded enough to date some with this status? Have anybody that's willing to share been in this situation?

    Personally, even though I am pretty informed when it comes to HIV/AIDS. I would be lying if I said that it wouldnt be some serious hesitation on my part. What say ye?
     
    #1 grownman, Jan 16, 2016
    Last edited: Jan 16, 2016
    Jaa and redsai84 dapped this.
  2. Dante

    Dante https://www.gofundme.com/qv7v5dw
    The Great Debater The 1000 Daps Club

    Age:
    43
    Joined:
    Sep 18, 2015
    Messages:
    874
    Daps Received:
    1,245
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Baltimore, MD
    Orientation:
    Homosexual
    Dating:
    Single
    From my experience, about a year ago, I communicated with a guy who was upfront about being HIV+. However, my turn off was the fact that he still engaged in unprotected sex as if yesterday news stated that the NIH and CDC confirmed that there is a cure for the disease. That was for the birds. I've noticed that over time, it's a growing thing for some people who are HIV+ (men) to be comfortable having sex without a condom because of PReP and other medical treatments. It's the "You can still live a long life with the disease" mentality as a justification...BYE!

    It's a natural feeling to be hesitant, as an HIV- person, to date/have sexual relations with someone who is HIV+. For me, my way of doing so will be very different aside someone who is HIV-. I wouldn't be paranoid walking around with medical equipment as if just breathing or existing around the person will spray the disease on me. I would say that as far as sex goes, condoms will be involved with any penetration (with no reservation) just like with any HIV- person (presumption aside), even orally.
     
    #2 Dante, Jan 16, 2016
    Last edited: Jan 16, 2016
  3. grownman

    The 100 Daps Club Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 26, 2015
    Messages:
    935
    Daps Received:
    1,201
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    fl
    Orientation:
    Gay
    Dating:
    Not looking
    I agree. I was briefly seeing a guy who also was HIV+. We did not have intercourse just some smooching and touching-however. He did not tell me about his status...Yeah. I was naïve and did not ask questions. I actually found out interesting enough through my ex. He had dated the same dude. Go figure.
     
  4. hannibal

    Most Comedic Player Squad Leader The 100 Daps Club

    Joined:
    Sep 6, 2015
    Messages:
    403
    Daps Received:
    620
    See, this is the kind of stuff I'm starting to see and it's disturbing to me. I'll gladly date a guy that is + and honest with me about it from the jump, however, within the past year I've had two friends who "found out" their partner was positive long after they began having unprotected sex. The kicker is, the partners knew they were positive and were hiding it. I think it's different if you are in a relationship and one partner DISCOVERS they are positive, but a completely different issue when the partner already knows and engages in unprotected sex. Insanely, both of the people I know are trying to make the relationship work because they both came out negative after repeated testing. I don't understand, but to each his own.
     
    Jaa, Nigerian Prince and grownman dapped this.
  5. grownman

    The 100 Daps Club Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 26, 2015
    Messages:
    935
    Daps Received:
    1,201
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    fl
    Orientation:
    Gay
    Dating:
    Not looking
    I could not agree more. I can own it and handle if this was discovered unknowingly. I am single now by choice but this adds to my skeptism about getting back out.
     
  6. acessential

    Squad Leader Best Thread Creator The 1000 Daps Club

    Joined:
    Sep 4, 2015
    Messages:
    700
    Daps Received:
    1,949
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Roaming
    I dated a dude who was HIV+. He didn't find out about his status until after we already started talking. Not gonna lie, it shook me a bit at first, but I moved past it. There's definitely a huge stigma attached to HIV. I'm not going to police anyone's dating choices, but in my opinion, if you meet someone you really vibe with on every other level, but they just happen to have HIV, that shouldn't necessarily be a deal breaker. I became a Google expert on HIV after learning about him. Looked at studies related to same-sex serodiscordant couples, thought about PreP, researched what practices were safer, and looked at how to support an HIV+ partner. Ultimately, things didn't work out. It wasn't because of his status in itself. It was because of other issues. Anyway, I'm rambling. I just think people need to be more educated on the topic. Especially since our demographic of black gay men are the hardest hit by the virus. Many of us almost exclusively date other black men, so we may run into when dating at some point. Just be prepared.
     
    Tyroc, Lancer, Jaa and 3 others dapped this.
  7. cypher21

    cypher21 Deactivated Account
    The 1000 Daps Club

    Joined:
    Sep 21, 2015
    Messages:
    1,079
    Daps Received:
    2,193
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    na
    Dating:
    Not looking
    All of the above are very good statements indeed...I would like to say that I can/could date someone with HIV. Being honest though this person would have to be special because I would be hesitant at first because of the stigma...I know enough about it to not be scared of it..but you still have to take extra precautions. People with HIV are still human beings that deserve happiness to me so I'm open to the possibility, like @acessential said there's only so many of us around and I wouldn't want to limit my chances of finding the right one over something like this
     
    #7 cypher21, Jan 16, 2016
    Last edited: Jan 16, 2016
    Tyroc, Jaa, acessential and 2 others dapped this.
  8. grownman

    The 100 Daps Club Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 26, 2015
    Messages:
    935
    Daps Received:
    1,201
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    fl
    Orientation:
    Gay
    Dating:
    Not looking
    I agree. That's one of the reasons I like to talk about stuff like this. This website is one of the few places where we can discuss more than just how fine somebody is.
     
    acessential dapped this.
  9. grownman

    The 100 Daps Club Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 26, 2015
    Messages:
    935
    Daps Received:
    1,201
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    fl
    Orientation:
    Gay
    Dating:
    Not looking
    I think that is awesome to hear that you are open minded since you are new to the dating scene. Yes, we have to be informed and then we can make a intelligent decision
     
    cypher21 dapped this.
  10. grownman

    The 100 Daps Club Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 26, 2015
    Messages:
    935
    Daps Received:
    1,201
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    fl
    Orientation:
    Gay
    Dating:
    Not looking
    I have been thinking about some of the comments while offline. I hate to admit it but most of my hesitation comes from my family. I spoke in a previous thread with @Tyroc about family members we have or had that died of the illness. My older cousin she contracted HIV from her husband who told her after he found out. He was known all over town for going through women.

    I know that since I am gay their would be a extra lens on me. But, yes I LOVE my brothas-so it's something that is in the back of my mind. Also, if their are anyone who may be living with HIV/AIDS and want to discuss your experiences with us feel free and welcome to share. No judgments or criticism here. This a safe and welcoming place. I promise.
     
    ControlledXaos and Tyroc dapped this.
Loading...
Similar Threads - DATING Forum Date
African Dating. Group Discussions May 30, 2023
Jamaica man attacked after using gay dating app LGBT News and Events Oct 25, 2021
Justice Smith Comes Out As Queer And Reveals He's Dating 'Queen Sugar' Actor Nicholas Ashe LGBT News and Events Jun 8, 2020
Dating During A Pandemic Dating and Relationships Apr 29, 2020
China tech firm to sell gay dating app Grindr for $608 million Dating and Relationships Mar 7, 2020

Share This Page

Loading...