Masculine hitting on Masculine

Discussion in 'Dating and Relationships' started by Cmolove, Nov 15, 2016.

  1. Cmolove

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    Soooo, erm... After listening to that podcast with the bottom round table, I got to thinking;

    How do masculine men who love men find other masculine men who love men, particularly outside of gay culture spaces? I mean, generally speaking, the assumption is that the more masculine a guy is, the more likely he is a top, right? So, if you're a top, into masculine bottoms...how do you find out if a guy is up for that? Course, you could ask in gay spaces & apps...but, if you don't use those spaces, the "traditional" sissy affect tells you everything you need to know...but the thug, or hard, affect doesn't send a gay/bi msg. It's especially hard to read bi brothers these days... So, with masculinity becoming more & more the default for black men who love men...how does that complicate approaching one to find out if he is down for you?

    Hope that makes sense...
     
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  2. sydney

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    It's a dilemma. My best friend is having issues with that.
     
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  3. OckyDub

    OckyDub is a Verified MemberOckyDub Fair Use Nigga....Fair Use
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    There are very few strict tops in my experience.
     
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  4. Cmolove

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    I've always been a top. Seems to me, no one is giving up azz these days. Everyone is about oral. But, statistically speaking, bi guys are less into anal than gay guys. Also, way harder to read...which, then goes back to getting past the whole masculine thing.
     
  5. OckyDub

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    We have Azz Showers here in ATL. Like on Tuesdays its cloudy with a chance of Azz.

    I'm also cool with the "frontal" or "sides" movement among gay/bi men.
     
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  6. Cmolove

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    LMBO "Cloudy days with a chance of azz!" The south always did have better weather than us.

    What is the frontal & sides movement???
     
  7. OckyDub

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    Everything but penetrative (anal) intercourse.
     
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  8. mysticalsoul

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    I see it like this. If a masc top/vers/bottom dude is attracted and truly respect his top partner, he will allow his submission to him out of honor and his personal choice. Most of these bottoms dudes do not get a lot out of these boring tops. When I say boring, I mean selfish with no intention of pleasing anybody but themselves. In my opinion, some of these tops don't be doing enough. It's more to sex than good dick. Sex is a complete package. I'm a vers guy for the most part and as much as I like being bottomed, I know I can put in more work than these total tops ever could!!!! I choose to top in some situations because I know I will please them better than they could for me.
    Also, I think there are many tops because it's easier and more convenient position to be in having casual sex than being on the receptive end. No preparation is needed to top and you have more control on what you want out of it. I'm not surprised by the overpopulation of tops recently.
     
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  9. SB3

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    Im gonna go ahead and decide that ur point is that ur not about to let a pansy climb ur back. Thats perfectly ok. #cosign. In my experience, most legit masc guys are waaay more open minded when they realize that theyre dealing w another legit masc dude. If ur into masculinity, and know how hard it is to come by, u figure it out.
     
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  10. African King

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    The older men are def more set in their ways. The young bucks are more open-minded when it comes to sexual positions. Most men I have come across in ATL are versatile then usually through convos I have with men I have met, many of the fem-leaning men are bottoms. Met a few strict tops in Atlanta and Fort Lauderdale...
     
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  11. acessential

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    Realize that nowadays "top" and "bottom" don't have to be concrete identity markers.

    I'm also very open to the "sides" movement that @Ockydub mentioned.
     
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  12. SB3

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    Strict anything is wack. Ive said it a million times on here, but, if ur fukn w dudes but u won't stick a peen in ur mouth, u play too much. Most dudes just don't come across legit masc guys often enough. All that shyt goes out the window.
     
  13. Aejae

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    I just wanna know how did y'all met up and got to know these dudes BEFORE Jack'd and A4A and all these other apps? Because for me (well part of it is that I'm always/always have been in the house, so just meeting and getting to know people IN GENERAL is hard for me without feeling nervous or awkward or hating not knowing how to start or continue to have a good conversation. One of my life problems.
     
  14. African King

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    I COMPLETELY AGREE 100%. Strict anything is garbage! Have fun and flip-flop! lol.

    I remember going to a house party and meeting a guy who said he was a top and a man I was there with who invited me said "that girl was nobody's top". So SHADY! Pretty much everyone in that room was versatile for the most part really. A few bottoms and then maybe 1 or 2 strict masculine tops in that whole 3 story house hahaha.
     
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  15. African King

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    The older gents (45+) that I know talked about bathhouses a lot but I know I did not want to go that route. I just say for you to get out more. Little by little. Different experiences will build up your confidence.
     
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  16. Sean

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    In my experience, meeting masculine guys outside of "gay culture" and discovering if they are compatible with you is a matter of time and patience, or a matter of gumption and thick skin. Either you will take the time and get to know a person to get a grasp of 1) whether or not they are down, then 2) how they get down or, you will grab your balls, make a move and have thick skin to absorb a verbal and/or physical blow if they aren't down and the emotional let down that comes along with that or finding out they aren't sexuality compatible if they are down. That make sense?
     
  17. Champagne Papi

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    help me understand how honour comes into play?
     
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  18. Michael

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    Cmon sides! Whatchu know about that @Ockydub? lol
     
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