Repeat After Me: “There is No Such Thing as a “Homosexual Lifestyle.”

Discussion in 'Race, Religion, Science and Politics' started by OckyDub, Sep 1, 2016.

  1. OckyDub

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    Today I read another Christian article alluding to a “same-sex lifestyle”. How we’re still talking like this as reasonable, intelligent adults in 2016 is fairly baffling in itself, but since some of us are let’s try to dig a little deeper and figure out just these folks are saying when they say it.

    The implication in such terminology is that there are somephysical behaviors that can be separated out from someone’s core identity; that a person can be authentically one thing as an internal reality and yet act very selectively in a way that runs in direct opposition to it.

    Without fail, a Conservative Christian makes this assertion about an LGBTQ person, in an effort to say that their “homosexuality” is what theydo, not who they are. They contend that these people can manage these outward behaviors and all will be well. A man who is attracted to men, they suggest, is really heterosexual and simply acting in a way that denies this (for reasons they usually can’t coherently name other than they hate their fathers or God).

    This leads to the common Church concept of a person being a “practicing homosexual”.

    Those lazily tossing around such terms usually have little regard for just how such an idea falls completely apart if they are asked to consider whether or not they are a “practicing heterosexual”. (Such an idea then becomes rightly ludicrous.) When it comes to their own identity and their own sexuality and their own sense of attraction and affection, they know full well that they act because they are a particular way. Their identity is not dictated by their behavior.

    We all have a gender identity and a sexual orientation and these things all fall along a vast and complicated continuum. It is this specific combination of both how we see ourselves and who we are drawn to that form this essential part of who we are.

    This is such a simple idea, but one the Church seems willfully intending to miss in order to still hold onto the prejudices and fears our faith inherited 3500 years ago when we didn’t know what we know now. These people are deliberately choosing to not know now; preferring religion to reality—and it’s ruining people’s lives and pushing them from the Church in droves.

    The idea for any of us, that who we are internally and what we do with our bodies can be compartmentalized is plainly ridiculous, and furthermore it’s irresponsible and dangerous to perpetuate such falsehoods in the Church. These teachings compel people, out of some guilt-induced desire to please God or in an effort to fit into religious community, to curb any outward expressions of their gender identity and sexual orientation. Many go as far as getting married to people of the opposite gender in an effort to behave themselves right; to fake-it-till-they-make-it.

    And one of two things invariably happens: They either die never being their most authentic selves, or they decide to stop suppressing their truth and it all blows up.

    The trail of depression, addiction, self-harm, divorces, and broken families it leaves is one of modern Christianity’s greatest sins. It’s creating unnecessary suffering. It’s forcing people into duplicity. It’s applying a rule to the LGBTQ community that doesn’t exist for straight, cisgender Christians.

    Whatever our gender indentity and sexual orientation are, these things do not become less or more so based on our behavior or by what we choose to show to the world. The Church and its leaders need to allow this simple reality to inform our theology, rather than clinging to our theology even if it perpetuates an old lie. We need to allow time, Science, History, and Humanity to educate us so that we treat people with the dignity befitting them. If we are to rightly love others as ourselves, we need to agree that they operate the same way that we do.

    There is no such thing as a heterosexual lifestyle.
    There is no such thing as a homosexual lifestyle.
    There are only lives.

    There are only individual human beings who have completely unique identities and inclinations to love and be loved, and God has placed them there. There is nothing we can do to alter those things in ourselves by acting or not acting in certain ways, and we can’t change those realities in other people by forcing them to behave in a way that we desire.

    People need and deserve to be the most authentic version of themselves; at home, at work, with family, in society—and especially in spiritual community.

    We need a Church and Christians wise and honest and brave enough to admit this, and to move ahead with creating a bigger table where all people can gather as they are.

    This doesn’t have to be difficult. Christians need to stop making it so.

    Repeat After Me: “There is No Such Thing as a “Homosexual Lifestyle.”
     
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  2. DreG

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    Yeah the whole gay behavior/lifestyle thing bugs me.It's like,are you straight because you decided to be ?Are you therefore potentially gay but decided it was less conevenient?
     
  3. ColumbusGuy

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    I have said the same thing when asked about or discussing the 'gay lifestyle' for a quarter of a century:

    Homosexual One: early 20's, single, Lives in the 'hip' area of a city, works at a bar, parties alot, visits lots of gay places, is an activist, etc.

    Homosexual Two: Late 30's, lives with his partner in the suburbs raising two kids, corporate job, very busy and little time for a social life.

    Homosexual Three: 75 years old, lives alone in a small town, retired. spends alot of time with friends and on hobbies.

    They are all homosexual men... now tell me...what is their common 'lifestyle'?
     
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  4. Tyroc

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    "This Lifestyle" like nails on a chalkboard whenever I hear it especially from gay dudes that insist it's a real thing and yet will go in on me about how I lead a boring old mans life.
     
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  5. jusrawb

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    I agree, I hate when people think they we live this total mysterious life that differs from the "normal" heterosexual life. It just makes me think when people discuss gay people they only think in terms of sexual acts. Even though the sexual acts that we perform are also done by heterosexuals.
     
  6. OckyDub

    OckyDub is a Verified MemberOckyDub I gave the Loc'ness monstah about $3.50
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    This is another way media has negatively influenced me. I don't know if you all have noticed but I have used the term Gay Lifestyle a lot when what I really meant to say or was referring to is Gay Culture. I have been self correcting.
     
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