Terry Crews Responds to D.L. Hughley For His Sexual Assault Comments

Discussion in 'Mental, Medical and Sexual Health' started by OckyDub, Jan 27, 2019.

  1. OckyDub

    OckyDub is a Verified MemberOckyDub I gave the Loc'ness monstah about $3.50
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    You can recap our discussion here:
    DL Hughley on Terry Crews: God Gave You Muscles So You Can Say "No"

    [​IMG]

    .L. Hughley came under fire Sunday when actor Terry Crews slammed the comedian on Twitter for comments he made last year mocking Crews’ alleged sexual assault.

    In a video posted to YouTube in August 2018, Hughley is asked during an interview with Vlad TV what he thinks of “the whole Terry Crews thing,” referring to the actor’s allegation in October 2017 that Hollywood talent agent Adam Venit had grabbed his penis and testicles during a party the year before.

    “I think it’s hard for me to think that a dude with all those muscles can’t tell an agent to not touch his ass,” Hughley had said. “I don’t understand. I think that now everybody’s so into this notion that, ‘It happened to me too.’ Hey, motherfucker, God gave you muscles so you could say no and mean it.”

    Hughley later joked in the interview that he felt “inferior” because gay men never tried to flirt with him.

    “I’m not sexy enough for that,” he said. “Here’s my problem: I’ve always had to talk women into sex with me, so I imagine it would have to be the same way with a gay dude.”

    Crews on Sunday tweeted a link to the resurfaced video and asked whether Hughley meant to imply that he had “wanted” to be sexually assaulted.

    “You told the world ‘God Gave Me Muscles So I Could Say No,” Crews tweeted. “Are you implying that I ‘wanted’ to be sexually assaulted? I’m listening, sir.”

    Hughley appeared to stand by his comments minutes later, tweeting that Crews “saw the video.”

    upload_2019-1-27_17-39-53.png

    Crews replied that he had “pushed” Venit after the alleged assault. But Hughley continued to taunt the “Deadpool 2” actor for not “slapping the shit” out of his assailant at the time.

    The back-and-forth ended with Crews questioning whether he should “slap the shit out of” Hughley over his “toxic behavior.”

    upload_2019-1-27_17-56-5.png

    Hughley shared an Instagram post hours later that stated, “It’s always the people that know you the least, that judge you the most,” with the hashtags #isaidwhatisaid and #notakebacks.

    Both Hughley and Crews declined HuffPost’s request for comment.

    Crews was one of the first men in Hollywood to come forward with a sexual assault allegation amid the wave of Me Too accusations in October 2017. Venit apologized to Crews in March 2018 before resigning from talent agency William Morris Endeavor in September.

    Hughley isn’t the only celebrity to make light of Crews’ alleged sexual assault. Rapper 50 Cent and hip-hop mogul Russell Simmons mocked Crews in June 2018 after he testified before Congress about being allegedly groped.

    Simmons had asked Crews to give Venit “a pass” in early November 2017. Weeks later, Simmons stepped down from his businesses following multiple sexual misconduct allegations against him.

    Crews on Sunday called out the men for deciding his sexual assault was “hilarious.”

    “ABUSERS PROTECT ABUSERS but they MOCK SURVIVORS as well,” Crews tweeted. “When you see me, keep it moving.”

    upload_2019-1-27_17-57-13.png

    Twitter users, including Martin Luther King Jr.’s daughter Bernice King, rallied in support of Crews of Sunday.

    “I appreciate your courage,” King wrote to Crews. “You are a compassionate, educating voice for male victims of sexual assault. Thank you for standing.”

    Anti-LGBT marriage advocate Bernice King commented.

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  2. OckyDub

    OckyDub is a Verified MemberOckyDub I gave the Loc'ness monstah about $3.50
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    IJS...When Crews first made his statements; he didn't say anything about him pushing dude away nor defending himself. This is why I think he received the reactions he did.

    2nd... did Crews threaten to slap DL? I'm sorry, isnt that toxic masculinity????
     
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  3. ControlledXaos

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    I read The Root comment section on this and it's a disaster. Black men saying what they would do if they were Terry in that situation and Terry only has muscles so he can't fight. Very few black men siding with TC.

    I'm not a TC fan but I understand why he reacted why he did. And with the way many wyppl fetish black men, I can see some queen going wild at the thought of a dark skinned muscle bound tall Black man alone in a room with them.
     
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  4. Winston Smith

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    Kind of see what it both ways. Crews was assaulted by definition of law, no doubt about it. And yes, men who are assaulted should not be left out of the discussion.

    D.L. is speaking on some simple, visceral sense that a big man being assaulted is not on the same level as a smaller woman. That thought may be wrong or right but IT IS natural whether we want to admit it or not. I work in an office full of govt attorneys but DESPITE the law they claim to be experts in, EVERY SINGLE ONE of them would initially give ME the side eye if I ( 6’3”) stated in a meeting that I was a victim like Crews compared to if our HR person, who is a petite 5-foot-tall woman, said the same. That may not be legally or even morally correct but that’s the reality of what 90% of the American population would initially think, their hypocritical, self-proclaimed virtue signaling aside.

    It’s like when I, as a disabled vet, occasionally need the easy seat on the bus due to occasional pain from war service. Black women give me the “ladies first” stink eye even though they claim they want to be treated equal; that is, a big black man is always supposed to be stoic no matter what. Yeah we need a discussion, but I’m co-signing @OckyDub on the whole toxic masculinity/femininity hypocritical bullshit.
     
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  5. ControlledXaos

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    Women only want to be treated equally when it gives them an advantage.
     
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  6. OckyDub

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    While I tend to lean towards DL's POV, I absolutely understand Crews' reaction to the reaction. I could understand his reaction to the assault more so in a corporate environment, not at a cocktail party and not when you are a Hollywood star. Seriously doubt as the woke twitter uses stated, like the police would come up in the party and shoot Terry Crews for punching dude in his chest or just pushing him HARD to the ground for touching his privates. GTFOH

    Again using the Will Smith example from the previous thread when he popped dude in his face for trying to kiss him; Crews to me, initially made it sound like dude grabbed his butt and crouch (in front of his wife) and he needed a fainting couch and his wife had to revive him.

    Also make no mistake, in the eyes of the public and Hollywood, Crews is seen as a "safe negro" (muscles and all) compared to DL's tell it like it is stance.
     
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  7. machoBLKnerd

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    if what you say is true--and i'm not arguing whether it is or isn't--then it would also be true for all groups who (believe they) are marginalized. literally every single group. not sure that women should somehow be expected to be the exception in this regard.

    i find myself saying this almost everyday: whether it's daily interpersonal interactions in dating and friendship, or broader social issues btwn various groups, ppl are consistently more invested in the ways they are victimized than in holding themselves accountable for any potential role (individual or collective) in harming others. it is a deeply deeply human character flaw. no one likes accountability. no one. western societies seem to struggle with this the most perhaps because of how much we emphasize individual rights above individual responsibility and collective well being.

    today, conversations in social justice or even just regular social media exchanges focus almost entirely on using articles/information as weapons against others, as a tool to create gotcha moments to out the other side. it all feels so me, me, me and my group, chatting in echo chambers. and then each of us gets to be so consumed by how much our ex, or white ppl, or men, or feminists, or gay ppl, or bernie supporters or or or ... have victimized/ inconvenienced us that we cannot see or acknowledge our own complicity or capacity around harming others.

    i wanna write a book called: pain has made us all narcissists and we dont even know it.

    and this concludes my ted talk lol

     
    #7 machoBLKnerd, Jan 29, 2019
    Last edited: Jan 31, 2019
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  8. Winston Smith

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    And I will be the first one in line to buy your book! You much more intelligently than me captured everything I hate about the fucking United States and it’s people!
    [​IMG]
     
  9. ControlledXaos

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    I was initially going to expand on that comment but deleted it and just left it at that so I'll explain now...

    Well my opinion is that some women want equal rights and at the same time want to keep advantages that chivalry has given them. Many women want the privileges that men have but don't want to let go of their current perks in the process or hand said perks over to men.

    If a husband makes less money than the wife and they divorce, if he gets awarded alimony most women will say that he should not get it and go out and get a job. Re Joseph C. Phillips recent divorce. How is that equal?

    When women leave abusive relationships/end up homeless they have shelters and services that they can reach out to for help. There are VERY few options for men who have the same situation going on. And no I don't mean that these options shouldn't exist for women as they definitely should but IIRC, there's less than 20 men's shelters across the USA.

    I am expected to hold doors and enter the elevator last. This is fine but I couldn't tell you how many times that I have had heavy ass shit in my hands and had women look me dead in the eye and not hold the door for me. I can manage and it's fine but still. I don't mind the elevator thing but it creates a very unnecessary awkward dance at 5:05 on the ground floor. And if the elevator isn't in the shaft when doors open, I hope Helen looks before she leaps.

    For some reason, and black women really love this one, if a man is arguing/making valid points that is contrary to theirs they say "well I don't know why a man wants to argue with a woman."

    Well stupidity and being wrong don't have anything to do with gender but when I hear that, I just say "OK" and stop talking/commenting. If you're pulling out that card, I feel like I've "won" the debate because they don't have anything else to counter with so they deflect. My points are valid and they are not able to bring themselves to say I'm right or making a good point even if they don't agree with me.

    I love women. I love independent women who don't sit back waiting on some dude to save or help them even more. I don't think they should have to pay taxes on female hygiene products. I think women should run top less at the park if they want. Women should not be afraid or ashamed to propose to a man if she wants to get married.

    Men definitely have advantages and women have perks too. Maybe ours outweigh theirs in certain areas and vice versa. It's fine. Can society improve things to make it "more equal" sure But I don't think that people really are ready for a completely black or white gender equal society because we're still tied down to traditional gender roles.
     
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  10. OckyDub

    OckyDub is a Verified MemberOckyDub I gave the Loc'ness monstah about $3.50
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    :babylawd:

    Over 70% of homeless people ARE MEN and yet there are less than 20 shelters across the US....think about that. Also many of these men are veterans.


    Everything is 'Mansplaining" now.:martin:

    100dap
     
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  11. OckyDub

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    I also want to add, that you will have men (mostly gay men) who will go hard for women's issues and completely ignore issues (outside of HIV) that impact men and could impact them directly.
     
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  12. bpaisle

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    I appreciate TC’s response to the agent at the time. I’m a strong believer in cool heads usually prevail and in that situation had TC beat that dude’s ass in the middle of that party, he would’ve been wrong so I think he did the right thing. With that said, I wouldn’t have been mad if he would’ve whooped his ass.

    I wasn’t mad about what D.L. said. I think he says a lot of stuff that other people are thinking.
     
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