Brehs, we present to you a new episode of the CYPHER AVENUE PODCAST where you’ll hear us give updates, engage in heated topic debates, interviewing interesting homosexual men of color and us verbally adding on to the articles posted on the website. The episodes will be available in four ways: You can listen to them on the site, watch on YouTube, download a MP3 version or subscribe to us on iTunes for automatic updates!
In this podcast, Cypher Avenue founders Ocky Williams and Nick Delmacy discuss Gay Alcohol, Gay Male Prostitutes, LGBT Music and whether it’s possible to be an Unofficial Gay Boyfriend.
MP3 VERSION:
DOWNLOAD LINK:
Cypher Avenue
Cypher Avenue is a direct response to the lack of a single website on the Internet catering to gay/bisexual men that love hip hop, pop culture, video games, sci-fi and mature, open minded conversations. Topics ranging from sex, sports, movies, new tech, science, fashion, comic books, politics, working out, hip hop, booze, television, cars, the outdoors, geek stuff, dating, and relationships; you name it, we have it.
Related posts
28 Comments
Leave a Reply to Inda MenCancel reply
Log In
Latest Cyphers
Subscribe Now
* You will receive the latest news and updates on your favorite celebrities!
The most masculine drink you can drink is Single Malt Scotch on the rock aged at least 18 years.
There is a craft drink Speakeasy where I live that has a decent gay male clientele and these men drink real drinks.
Old Fashioned…
Manhattan’s…
…and my personal favorite – the simple but classy Single Malt Scotch on the Rocks.
” alt=”” title=”” class=”bbcode-image” />
” alt=”” title=”” class=”bbcode-image” />
All this up here is some real shit!
I like Crown Royal on ice
Interesting podcast…..As for manly drinks, being a vodka man myself depending on the establishment I go for the classic Martini, for dark liquours Tennessee Whisky….If you are a gay man living in a big city you’ve ventured through the local “gay hoe stroll” at least once lol, if anything you do it for the entertainment value. And I agree you never know where you’re going to meet someone, whether a bar a club the park (day or night) the gym or where ever if you’re open to the person and the idea of seeing them on a regular basis more power to you…I wasn’t aware of 98% of the peaple on your top 20 list but after after going back and looking at each video I agree Earth Tone should be number 1…On the when do you call aomeone your boyfriend issue, you make some valid points, I don’t see anything wrong with calling a guy your boyfriend and there’s no specific time frame as to when things are afficial, only you know when things have come to that point and that’s the time you have to have that conversation. I will admit with you that SOME gay men don’t know how to date, try it looks as though all gay men do is hook up, nothing wrong with that, but a somepoint you decide to differenciate the two, depending on how you feel about the guy you state up front “I want to date you/you date me or all I want from this is sex” he can’t read you mind and you can’t be afraid to say how you feel, otherwise you’ll keep doing the same thing with the same results hoping to get something different out of it….
As a former alcoholic, I kinda despise the actual taste of alcohol now so I tend to stick to the most basic of the basics when I do go out…Vodka Cranberry. It’s cheap and gets the job done, and doesn’t get me F’d up. To this day I don’t know how I spent the better part of my 20’s throwin’ back 151 and Tequila shots like nothing and slurpin’ on Erk & Jerk, Hennessy, MD 20/20 and basically anything distilled on the weekends, and downing Heineken and Steel Reserve til I passed out 7 days a week (mind you, I hate(d) beer, but it was alcohol LOL). I guess a better question is how I made it through all that without developing cirrhosis of the liver.
Not Steel Reserve! I aint NEVER had a beer, A BEER, ONE!, have me that fried!
LOL When I drank, I drank to get f’d up. Steel Reserve definitely got the job done, my dude.
There are so many wonderful moments and also levels to this and I will approach this on solely personal level..
Firstly,concerning the HBO looking I personally love that show and not every part of it i could relate to, the hooking up in the woods/park, growing up in African and moving to Europe. It does SO much speak to what I look for in a guy( Richie,the Mexican character and DAMN he is SO smoking hot and straight*sad face*) and in a relationship in general. Those who have seen Looking would know what I am talking about when it comes to Richie. The writer and director Andrew Haigh (British and who by the way is the guy that tries to jerk off the main xter in the beginning), who did ‘Weekend’ wonderful movie by the way and also what HBO Looking is built up on, said he can not show or cover the whole spectrum of gay guys out there but would try to do so.
Secondly, the issue of Boyfriend or Husband boils down to the two or more individuals involved. Eg. I meet this Irish guy and we hit it of immediately and I told him, I like the first day we meet. I told him we should get to know each other more hanging out in social gatherings with friends around no activity that leaves us alone together. It has been great, are we both meeting other people? Sure.
I want it to happen organically, might be with him or someone else but i am not going to say ‘oh that’s my boyfriend’ or ‘ my hubby’. When I meet that person and we have been going on for months or years we will both know it. Even if it has to be said like ‘you know we are exclusive right’ or something to that effect our minds,actions,body would have long been in sync before the words are uttered.
KNOWLEDGE DARTH OF THIS PODCAST: I AM NOT ABOUT TO QUIT LOOKING FOR A JOB, JUST BECAUSE YOU GAVE ME AN INTERVIEW!!!. I screamed *PREACH* when that was said lol
Goodness, such a convoluted conversation, you guys must go way longer when talking in private.
In the end I get what you both were trying to convey, but at the same time I felt that this is something that is being made to be complicated. Now I won’t deny the complexities of dating and its intricacies, that would be illogical, however at the same time I think that things are as complicated as we make them.
When it comes to life in general I’ve learn through many people, including gentlemen as yourselves, that one conducts their life how they see fit; and dating is a part of that.
As for the whole boyfriend question I stick to what I said before. Just because Nick was doing exceptional things for certain people he was fond of doesn’t mean that a title is necessary. A kind act of any kind really doesn’t need a reason or explanation. As for the answer to the question, I honestly think that it’s a question that only Nick can answer himself as it deals with how he governs his dating life and his outlook on dating.
Or perhaps it could have been the opposite because even at the initial post to this podcast it sounded like Nick kind of already came to a conclusion himself and was just opening a conversation to everyone.
I agree with Ocky that one defines their dating ways and two people seeing each other define what they are. It’s not something that can be answered generically as everyone’s relationships and ways are different.
Anyways, on a lighter note, as someone who enjoys alcohol I love the dark’s and the lights and will try anything once. As for “manliness” in my experience its never been the type of drink, its always been that I don’t mix my drinks at all. That separates the men from the boys lol.
P.S. No ice either^^
So, it appears I picked a good episode to serve as my introduction to the podcast. It’s hard to be able to represent yourself well in written and verbal form, and you two have accomplished this. Keep it up. Great chemistry and very entertaining.
I’m glad that you ended the discussion on a point that serves as the basis of truth regarding the topic: everyone is entitled to call their situation what they want. There will never be a universal answer on what the term “boyfriend” means, when it’s time to use it, and whether there are levels of the term. We all define those things as we see fit based on experience. Boyfriend, couple, together, kickin’ it, etc, all mean different things to different people and it’s completely ok.
Regarding the use of the word boyfriend, I don’t really like the term. I’ve never used it and no one has ever called me that either. Because I’m in my 30s, the word doesn’t even seem appropriate to represent any scenario I would find myself in now. Maybe when I was in middle school, but now that I have my grown man status, nope.
Oh, and towards the end, one of you mentioned that in your circle, you’re exposed to lots of couples that have been together for a long while. That argument is always used if ever I say that I don’t have a lot of couples to look up to in terms of relationships. But honestly, it’s not that I don’t know of couples, because I do. It’s just that I don’t want what those couples have. Yes, they are a couple, but are they happy? Yes, they are a couple, but are they monogamous? Yes, they are a couple, but is the relationship healthy? Yes, they are a couple, but do they like each other as people and not for monetary or aesthetic reasons? Yes, they are a couple, but is one laying hands on the other? Once you break down the “couples” in terms of the types of relationships you want to have, those numbers don’t end up being so great.
Lastly, I think one of the big reasons that we have so much trouble being men who like other men is that most of us aren’t taught to focus on relationships when we’re young boys/men. My dad–when I saw my dad–instilled in me that what made me a man was how many notches I had on my bed post. I wasn’t taught how to date or romance someone or even that those things had value. My father wanted me to conquer as much as I could because that’s what would make him proud…not walking around wearing the title of some girl’s boyfriend. Thus, it makes it hard to go from the conquer strategy to the “boyfriend” strategy, especially if you’ve never seen it successfully done.
Anyway, great job with the podcast.
These last two paragraphs…
Paragraphs 4 and 5 are truth. I know a good amount of gay and str8 couples, probably a similar number amongst my close male/female friends. I stay in my lane and admit I don’t know what happens behind closed doors, but what I do know from the mouths of some of the ppl in these relationships (and maybe even the fact that I have been privy to certain pieces of info in the first place), I’m good lol.
The key words here are “Gay and Straight Couples.” The original commenter seemed to imply that all gay relationships have these problems but straight relationships don’t. Quantitatively, I’ve seen and been negatively influenced by more dysfunctional Heterosexual relationships in my life than Homosexual relationships. But that’s just me. If all you have to go on for examples are relationships of gay men under 25 years old, I can see how it would appear that they all are chaotic and flawed.
Hmm…I didn’t see him say that or imply it was only gay couples…he said the couples HE is aware of. We don’t know if they are gay or straight. Also the examples he used were not gay, straight, gender or age specific.
I understand and agree with your point, I just don’t see where dude made those statements or generalizations.
He made that statement in response to your question in the podcast about “trolls” on the site saying Gay Relationships aren’t realistic because there are none, etc.
“Oh, and towards the end, one of you mentioned that in your circle, you’re exposed to lots of couples that have been together for a long while. That argument is always used if ever I say that I don’t have a lot of couples to look up to in terms of relationships.”
Ocky and Nick,
It’s awesome to see that you two review the comments and provide feedback. Keep it up and keep.
I did want to add that I wasn’t trying to imply that gay relationships have problems that straight relationships don’t. Straight men, aren’t attracted to me so I can’t speak on what they are doing outside their relationships. However, at 35 years of age, I have yet to meet a gay couple where neither one of the two individuals haven’t hit on me or let me know that it was ok to be a third party to whatever they had going on in their relationship.
Actually, maybe their is one recently married couple where neither member has hit on me, but that doesn’t mean that all my past experiences are null and void. I’m just speaking from my experiences and not saying that it’s not possible to have a monogamous relationship between two men. I’m just saying that whereas there seems to be lots of examples of straight couples who do this, my parents included, I don’t see many gay couples who handle their relationships that way.
Great podcast.
I don’t drink so can’t comment on that lol.
But it was interesting to hear all of your perspectives on gay relationships, gay boyfriends, and all that. You both have interesting takes on relationships. As someone who hasn’t been in a relationship period, male or female, I don’t know how things will go but I do feel that whenever I am supposed to meet my first potential suitor then that is when I will meet him. If that makes sense lol.
Great podcast!!!
Tequila for me. Putting any of the other 19 songs above “Fuck is you”… no. You always need to talk with the other guy about the situation of your relationship, for some people is important to know if both of them are in the “same channel”.
Definitely agree with ppl loving to throw around the word friend, boyfriend, etc. We hang out from time to time and have fun, you are an associate, not a friend. We went on two dates, we have gone out, we aren’t even dating. If someone says “I’m with my boyfriend” and we have never even talked about establishing a RELATIONSHIP (key word) and what that would look like and mean for us, I probably wont be mad, but trust and believe I’m going to be like, “uhhhh what are you talking about, I didn’t sign up for that yet.” JMO
I really enjoyed this podcast. Thats all…
Oh yea! Ive never done the escort/hooker thing, but boy did you make that shit sound hot @ocky
Great podcast guys. It was honest, open,and a fair exchange of points of view. Ockx, i appreciated your share for it was rational and its candor showed your growth. We should all be honest in our disclosure.
#one to grow on
Just finished the podcast:
A) Y’all gotta chill with this “gay voice” lol, not because it’s lowkey offensive (which it kinda is, but I’m not personally offended), but because y’all apply it to any voice of dissension lol
B) To the point of the whole title and label convo, none of it means anything without a discussion being had with the other party. The whole conversation was based off one party’s perception of what’s going on in the situation, but it doesn’t take into account the other person’s thoughts. You’re not in it by yourself. You can feel like you’re making big steps in your relationship by blowing off friends, keeping that person’s favorite things at your house, and dating them exclusively, but if the other person doesn’t see that as big steps, and may not see it at all, and you find out they’re seeing someone else, you’re gonna be pissed. In that instance you have no right to be because no conversation was had.
“A) Y’all gotta chill with this “gay voice” lol, not because it’s lowkey offensive (which it kinda is, but I’m not personally offended), but because y’all apply it to any voice of dissension ”
LOL! I’m a MAJOR offender with this myself. Something to work on.
Really great podcast. Escort business sounds very interesting. Not sure if I can have to many randoms popping up in my car. But if you role on Chesire Bridge in ATL, it would be hard to find. Anyways…I like the end the most. Good stuff!!!
Day 30 is too early. ” alt=”” title=”” class=”bbcode-image” />
You might get this from me after day 30…lol
” alt=”” title=”” class=”bbcode-image” />