Dear Tops / Vers Tops...Please read and Take Notes!

Discussion in 'Dating and Relationships' started by OckyDub, Jan 11, 2019.

  1. OckyDub

    OckyDub is a Verified MemberOckyDub I gave the Loc'ness monstah about $3.50
    Site Founder The 10000 Daps Club

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2015
    Messages:
    6,340
    Daps Received:
    14,593
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    The planet of Memory Corpses
    Orientation:
    Homosexual
    Dating:
    Married
    From the opinion piece "Top Privilege"

    Personally, I've never had an issue or been offended when on the receiving end of painting. I do blame most of this on the ideals of bottom / anal "pristine'ness" from gay porn.

    I hope the purists take notes...

    [​IMG]
    ********* **************
    Paint shaming
    Lastly, I’d like to speak on a topic that I believe isn’t given enough attention within our community, and that’s paint shaming.

    For those of you who don’t know what ‘painting’ in this context is, it’s a slang term to describe when a bottom isn’t fully cleaned out and a little something is left on the top’s penis.

    Now, I personally think bottoms are made to upheld completely ridiculous standards, not only dietary wise but also supplementary! I’ve seen threads upon threads of tweets and Facebook statuses about what bottoms can do to make sure they have pristine anuses for their tops.

    Some people go to certain extremes as taking six fiber pills a day, using multiple Fleet enemas, and not eating for hours prior to a hookup. And while this humble top is no nutritionist, I can’t imagine that’s healthy.

    ‘Collateral damage’
    I understand that most bottoms do this to feel less worried, more prepared, and cleaner, but as tops we have to stop demanding such perfection from bottoms.

    We must be more understanding if something goes wrong, and recognize how much labor and time bottoms put into their bodies (specifically their buttholes).

    They may say they do it for themselves, but we tops reap the fruits of their efforts either way, and we do not appreciate it enough.

    I have heard stories of tops kicking bottoms out after being painted, making a big deal about it, and causing further embarrassment to the bottom. It’s just not right. Tops should know what they sign up for, and if we can’t handle a little collateral damage we shouldn’t be playing the game to begin with.

    [​IMG]
     
    #1 OckyDub, Jan 11, 2019
    Last edited: Jan 12, 2019
    I-Stay-Woke, SB3, itsumoconfused and 3 others dapped this.
  2. takeyourmeds91

    The 1000 Daps Club

    Joined:
    Apr 27, 2016
    Messages:
    768
    Daps Received:
    3,161
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    FL
    It comes with the territory. That's like going out drinking and being mad cus you got a hangover the next day....you knew what the risks were...it's not that deep.

    Now. If he full-on shits on me. That's a problem.
     
    I-Stay-Woke and itsumoconfused dapped this.
  3. machoBLKnerd

    The 100 Daps Club

    Joined:
    Jul 11, 2017
    Messages:
    147
    Daps Received:
    583
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Harlem, NYC
    Dating:
    Single
    for a jump off, nigga be clean. you called me over and should've been prepared.

    in a relationship or living with someone for years feels different. first, you care about them and are willing to put up with more of their shit lol second, sex isn't as planned when someone is fully integrated into your life, so accidents will happen at some point.
     
    #3 machoBLKnerd, Jan 11, 2019
    Last edited: Jan 11, 2019
    SB3 and mojoreece dapped this.
  4. takeyourmeds91

    The 1000 Daps Club

    Joined:
    Apr 27, 2016
    Messages:
    768
    Daps Received:
    3,161
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    FL
    That's a good distinction
     
    I-Stay-Woke, SB3 and mojoreece dapped this.
  5. RolandG

    Bae Material Squad Leader The 1000 Daps Club Supporter

    Age:
    40
    Joined:
    Oct 11, 2015
    Messages:
    761
    Daps Received:
    2,313
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Georgia
    Dating:
    It's complicated
    @OckyDub lying y'all. I can't believe that Ocky would be totally okay with a dude passing his entire Thanksgiving meal during intercourse. This was discussed in a Podcast years ago and I think the consensus was most Tops are definitely ok with a little residue. I think @Nick Delmacy called it chocolate chips but that he wouldn't be ok with a whole mud monsoon. If an accident happens, then that's understandable but 99.9% of people are gonna stop to clean up because not many people want shit all over them whether they are bottom, top or verse. No reason for a bottom to feel ashamed.

    I don't understand why gay people act as if it's totally ok to get shitted on while having sex. Yes, taking a shit is normal but getting shitted on while having sex is definitely not "normal" by any means. Urination is normal but I don't wanna get R Kellyed while having sex. Menstrual cycles are normal but most women don't have sex while on their cycle because who wants to cover their sex partner in blood. Hell, if we gonna normalize painting, why not everybody just stop having good hygiene overall and start fucking while we stank to high heavens.

    Second, this idea of Tops slipping off condoms while in the middle of sex is foul. I don't understand how this happens though. Don't bottoms watch the top put the condom on or are bottoms just bent over with their face buried in a pillow while trusting the Top to put on a condom? Also, If I were a bottom, I think I would be looking back everytime the Top slowed down or stopped fucking just to make sure they're not up to any shenanigans.

    *Sidenote* I've asked bottoms about their status before only for them to tell me that they only have safe sex but that they know that Tops have removed the condoms with them before. I always look at them with a side eye because if someone did that to me, I would either be in Jail for murder or too paranoid to ever trust another Top. The fact that some bottoms say this happens to them all the time leads me to believe that most have some sort of fetish with raw sex and it turns them on for the condom to be removed. Not all of them but most. For this to happen to them while they remain nonchalant just makes me wonder.
     
  6. OckyDub

    OckyDub is a Verified MemberOckyDub I gave the Loc'ness monstah about $3.50
    Site Founder The 10000 Daps Club

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2015
    Messages:
    6,340
    Daps Received:
    14,593
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    The planet of Memory Corpses
    Orientation:
    Homosexual
    Dating:
    Married
    You are correct. I think it should be clear (obvious) we're talking about within reason, not fecophilia. Not no 2-girls-1-cup type shit.

    The first thing that ALWAYS comes to my mind if/when it happens is, "that is what soap and water is for". I'm not saying continue to completion....nope, get up, clean off and then jack off and keep it moving.

    There was one kat I was with in my early early twenties who was beginning to paint and I told him dont worry, not to move, went to the bathroom, cleaned myself off, got tissue, cleaned him off and then wiped his butt with a warm cloth (rinse and repeat) and still had a great session afterwards...just with no butt play.

    I'm thankful that years later when I did it to somebody they were just as patient with me and didn't make it a big deal.

    Everyone is different....its just not an "end or the world" crisis for me.
     
  7. RolandG

    Bae Material Squad Leader The 1000 Daps Club Supporter

    Age:
    40
    Joined:
    Oct 11, 2015
    Messages:
    761
    Daps Received:
    2,313
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Georgia
    Dating:
    It's complicated
    First off, I just hollered.

    Second, that was such a sensual moment when you took a warm cloth and, gently, wiped the dudes butt. Touching.

    Yeah, I get what you're saying and I agree. I've had a guy leave me a little Campbell's Beef Stew on my willie and I just stopped and cleaned myself off and had a good j/o session afterwards. I certainly didn't jump up screaming and running to the bathroom making gagging noises.

    But my point is, bottoms are beginning to act like everyone is into scat and dirty sex. Most dudes don't want dookie on them. I don't want it to get to a point where Tops are forced to deal with all bottoms who are boycotting preparation and refusing to even try and clean at all as mentioned in the article. The amount of gay sex will decrease for sure. May even drive down the STI rate. LOL
     
    OckyDub dapped this.
  8. Omega Level

    Omega Level DRACARYS
    The 1000 Daps Club

    Age:
    42
    Joined:
    Sep 9, 2015
    Messages:
    657
    Daps Received:
    1,658
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    New York
    Dating:
    Single
    @takeyourmeds91 I fucks with you but,,,,,NO THE HOLY FUCK IT DONT!!!:whut:

    @RolandG If bottoms are acting like that, then these are some lazy ass, fat, greedy ass fucks who want dick and hot wings at the same time...FUCK OUTTA HERE. Be professional.

    Listen, Im not sure who fixed they mouth writing this opinion piece, but speaking for myself and fellow personal comrades I know who bottom, the shear suggestion of the above "painting" scenario is some amateur hour bullshit!!!

    DISCLAIMER - I am more than aware the primary purpose of an ass hole is for eliminating, however, if you are gonna take on the glorious role as bottom in any given moment, know how to fuckin clean yourself in a way dudes can eat your ass on a plate. And YES, it is possible to be that clean.

    First off, know your body! And know how it reacts to food!

    If you know you had a big meal, have an upset stomach, feel bloated, etc, why in the fuck are you trying to take dick? Dude, you can wait another day.

    At the very least the only exception I would give a bottom who has a painting accident is a very young, 20ish, baby gay who's just getting into gay sex and don't know the ins and outs.

    If you over 30 plus and been in this gay shit for over 10 plus years and you STILL painting in anyway, you a lazy disgusting fuck.

    Im 40 and at this stage I can't even imagine any moment where I would paint a top. That shit has not happened literally since Ive been in my early 20's. I can always tell if my stomach won't permit my ass to get pounded and I abide by it. I also have more than one routine to get the shit squeaky clean depending on the situation.

    The bottom role isn't for punks, its some serious shit. Be a pro and do your do due diligence before just bending over for christ sake.
     
  9. SB3

    SB3 is a Featured MemberSB3
    Squad Veteran Most Valuable Player The 1000 Daps Club Supporter

    Age:
    37
    Joined:
    Aug 31, 2015
    Messages:
    3,537
    Daps Received:
    8,232
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    BK, NY
    :ashley::dame::gucci:

    I don't know what to say or how to feel after that, but tell em why you mad bro...
     
  10. takeyourmeds91

    The 1000 Daps Club

    Joined:
    Apr 27, 2016
    Messages:
    768
    Daps Received:
    3,161
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    FL
    Wow. I think this is the most caring and sensitive I've ever heard you be.

    ----------------------------

    RE: @Omega Level Oh, you meant that...
     
    mojoreece and ControlledXaos dapped this.
  11. OckyDub

    OckyDub is a Verified MemberOckyDub I gave the Loc'ness monstah about $3.50
    Site Founder The 10000 Daps Club

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2015
    Messages:
    6,340
    Daps Received:
    14,593
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    The planet of Memory Corpses
    Orientation:
    Homosexual
    Dating:
    Married
    Don't know why you, @RolandG and @SB3 talk about me like I'm some heartless monster
     
    takeyourmeds91 and ControlledXaos dapped this.
  12. ControlledXaos

    Squad Veteran Most Valuable Player The 1000 Daps Club

    Age:
    44
    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2015
    Messages:
    2,529
    Daps Received:
    7,146
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Atlanna
    IDK if Y'all talking about someone took a whole dump on your dick or if Hershey kiss sized turd didn't make it out with the rest of the log and now it's smeared some on your junk/condom.

    So I think that there is a threshold of how much is reasonable. But if you know you didn't take a dump since 4pm and now it's 2am and you trying to it in, you may want to rethink that. I know a lot guys make sure they are always right before they leave the house if they know things may go a certain way. Some guys bring someone/go to someone's home and take the time to get ready. They make enema attachments for standard water bottles now to get things ready.

    For me the smell would bother me so we'd have to stop, clean up, and keep it moving. Heat, friction and poop are not a good mix at all. Also if during and I'm on bottom, if I start to feel uncomfortable after I was feeling OK before, we're stopping and moving on to non penetrative stuff. Depending on my mood I can excuse myself to the bathroom, get things right, and we can continue. This is less likely but has happened. I'm super self conscious, so before I decide to bottom, I've taken the time to make sure that Thang is right beforehand.

    IDK it seems to me that if you bottom all the time you'd be taking fiber pills or eating right so that your stool is consistent, regular, and you constantly have the "clean drop" so that you are good to go. If you stay ready you don't have to get ready.

    As far as condom removal goes...I think it happens often enough. Sometimes they break, rarely, and the top doesn't say anything. Different brands have different dexterity.. Sometimes they are old and mofos don't check the dates but think about it, you may have your eyes closed or in a position where you can't see. Or the room is dark. It definitely happens with some of these ain't shit dudes. I have not done or had that happen to me however. But it's very possible.
     
    I-Stay-Woke and takeyourmeds91 dapped this.
  13. SB3

    SB3 is a Featured MemberSB3
    Squad Veteran Most Valuable Player The 1000 Daps Club Supporter

    Age:
    37
    Joined:
    Aug 31, 2015
    Messages:
    3,537
    Daps Received:
    8,232
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    BK, NY

    @Nick Delmacy : 'yo ocky, did u hear that sb3 and his friend got hit by a bus?!?'

    @OckyDub : 'hold up, @ControlledXaos wasn't w him, was he?!?!'

    Nick: 'no, i don't think so'

    Ocky: 'oh ok...well, his bad, he prob hit the bus first'
    ------------------------------------------

    This is a true story...
     
    OckyDub and ControlledXaos dapped this.
  14. ControlledXaos

    Squad Veteran Most Valuable Player The 1000 Daps Club

    Age:
    44
    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2015
    Messages:
    2,529
    Daps Received:
    7,146
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Atlanna
    See...
     
    SB3 dapped this.
  15. Mrmack8913

    Supporter

    Age:
    31
    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2017
    Messages:
    30
    Daps Received:
    59
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Charlotte
    Orientation:
    Gay
    Dating:
    Single
    Damn some of yall proving the writer's point in the post. I'm a full bottom so I'm quite familiar with the good bad and ugly of anal. I rarely ever paint but it has happened. Mainly when I was just starting out and didnt have a good douching regimen or knew my body well. Now I'm pretty good at gauging whether I'm ready to freak or not.

    That being said it's an ass and sometimes low and behold accidents happen. There's no cut off age of when you paint sometimes you can do everything right and your body will find a way to betray you. Thankfully most tops where it has happened played it cool and we jus cleaned up and kept it moving. It's not some world ending crisis. Trust most bottoms aren't going around to paint on purpose. Its embarrassing af and more a hassle for the bottom but you cant tell these egotistical tops that smh.
     
    OckyDub and ControlledXaos dapped this.
  16. OckyDub

    OckyDub is a Verified MemberOckyDub I gave the Loc'ness monstah about $3.50
    Site Founder The 10000 Daps Club

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2015
    Messages:
    6,340
    Daps Received:
    14,593
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    The planet of Memory Corpses
    Orientation:
    Homosexual
    Dating:
    Married
    :bronbad::mjlol:
     
Loading...
Similar Threads - Dear Tops Vers Forum Date
Dear White Gay Men, Stop Turning Yourselves Into Heroes LGBT News and Events Jan 6, 2018
Dear Google: Why are You Associating Ejaculate with a Muslim Girl? Race, Religion, Science and Politics Nov 26, 2017
Dear Ben Affleck; Remember that Time Your Brother was Accused of Sexual Assault? Podcasts Oct 10, 2017
Dear Clifton... Sports and Athletes Sep 26, 2017
Dear Straight Men: I'm Not One Of The Boys, So Stop Treating Me As Such LGBT News and Events Aug 16, 2017

Share This Page

Loading...