This is a post I did on another site about a 19 year old going with a much older guy....aka Twink and Daddy... (I'm not a fan of twinks at all..) Boring story alert: When I was much younger 19 (the twinks age) in Houston, I remember all the older gays trying to hit on the younger ones and some would. There was this older guy, maybe late 50s at the time who tried to holla at me and my friends made a note that, "Oh he a sugar daddy. He got money, he can take care of you." I turned that man down every chance I got. I remember thinking about it but something didn't sit right with me pretending to like a dude for some money. It makes me feel like an "unhinged slut". I've never wanted a man to "take care" of me anyways. I like my own flow. I do remember a lot of older gays always saying to me. "I was your age once." That doesn't really hit you at the time, of course. I learned early during my "gay days" in H-town that once you reach a certain age in the gay lifestyle, you become an accessory to accommodate fresh meat and once they have had meat that is fresh, you're pretty much old news. To me, I view gay years like faux dog years. However, old you are now, add 7 years to it and that's your gay age to young folks. I only felf old because I've only had sex 5 times my entire life and I'm low-key not that interested in it anymore. Seems like porn works like this too. One your well runs dry....Issa desert for you. For some reason that post reminded me of some of the folks from back then. A few of them are not with us today due to several reasons (HIV, murder..etc). I doubt that sugar daddy Mike is still alive. He may be but last I remember, he had a stroke I believe in 07...or something (when I left H-town for good). I think whatever it was put him in the hospital and he "may" have died. There's some thoughts swirling in my head reminding me of a comment about him just wanting to spend time with someone because he thinks he's gonna "go" soon and he didn't want to die alone. I'm not to sure if it's from my authentic memory banks since it was so long ago. Such a world we live in. Some of you guys, who I say aren't old (don't mind me. I've been calling an old friend of mine 33 or something for like years and he's almost fourty or something.) Do any of you want to be with someone when you get old or are you fine with dying "alone"? When you see gray hair will you rejoice? Or pull a Will Smith Everytime he gets to act in a movie? When men get older, they say they put on more weight... Or will you be a DILF?!?!
“We are all alone, born alone, die alone, and—in spite of True Romance magazines—we shall all someday look back on our lives and see that, in spite of our company, we were alone the whole way. I do not say lonely—at least, not all the time—but essentially, and finally, alone. This is what makes your self-respect so important, and I don't see how you can respect yourself if you must look in the hearts and minds of others for your happiness.” ― Hunter S. Thompson
Interesting quote. I kinda agree in a way dealing with people. I also believe that we are all connected through the Universe. What is the point of man to be on Earth? To procreate and continue the legacy? When a man dies, is that it or does he "return to the Universe"...
I really enjoyed and related to this quick read. I can mirror this with my own experiences...but can take it a step forward personally and say when I reciprocated on an older man's (white dude btw) advances just to get a couple of hun'neds...call a spade a spade...I was a prostitute. PERIOD On one hand I can say the elders should uplift and nurture the younger generation of non-heterosexuals. On the other, many older or of age people (regardless of sexuality or gender) seek those younger. Some may even say "fuck it, I'm not getting younger" and seek someone of another race as long as they're younger and will respond to advances.
I dunno, I’ve always thought the “daddy” thing was creepy, gay or straight, but I’m also the libertarian one round here saying ditch the cisgender norms for consenting gay and straight adults (open marriages, FWBs, etc.). And I think I’ve also cited May-December gay relationships that weren’t role play but real love (civil rights pioneer Bayard Rustin, famous skeptic the Amazing Randi). That being said, I agree with @OckyDub that much of the time these hookups are for sexual, financial convenience. But I don’t want to be too dismissive. A lot of us have have had mentors, older “gay brothers”, platonic or sexual, who helped us work out our own life problems. That’s a good thing. But the gay equivalent of Sumner Redstone or Anna Nicole Smith is just creepy to me. Personally, while no one likes getting older due to ailments, etc. people need to learn to deal intelligently with age in western society more maturely. Younger bros would have it so much easier if older ones had their shit more together and could be better anchors. Youre not going to regain some “lost youth or sexuality” by constantly and deliberately prowling for dudes younger than you. Personally, I’m comfortable in my not-too-old skin and enjoy being at the stage in my life where I’m now the guy in the cardigan with the pipe dispensing encouragement to younger CA squad like Nick, Ock, @Sean P etc. even though often it comes off to y’all like Lol This brother always has good insights on being sexual, getting older, without being an ass: Immanuel’s 7 Tips for Growing Older Gay with Grace So tldr: Be your own man at any stage in life. Any “big brother” or “daddy” in your life should be there to encourage you not push up on you.
As I hit the bit 3-0. This is something I ponder. Im starting to see dudes that i find attractive like "shawn wells " Oh hes my type. Then....... look at his age 21. Im getting old. Like would i really be OK dating someone 10 yrs younger than me. Would I be Robbing the cradle? I remember when I was younger I actually wanted to date someone older than me but it never materialized.
