Best Posts in Thread: Marriage Is Boring

Like with most things in life, everything isn't for everybody. If you don't like marriage, find something that works for you. The only way to do that is be open and explore. Sometimes if your life is mundane and boring, so are your relationships.

 

Marriage is what you make it. If you have a clear idea about what you want your commitment to look like and you make a conscious decision daily to avoid the rut or routine it can last. My parents have been married 32 years, they put their marriage first, didn't allow themselves to become roommates as they say. They still go on dates, went on vacations, even without us, as children and now in retirement they spend a little less than half their time at their vacation home in Mustique enjoying the hell out of each other so it can be done.

 

I never really got why any of us wanted marriage - that is until everyone got so worked up trying to ensure that those of us who did want marriage couldn't enjoy it. But that said, I's still not sure what the big deal is. I was in a relationship for 23 years and there were plenty of boring days. And then there were those days where I wished it could be boring, what with all the drama. Now I am single and there seem to be just as many boring days and just as many drama days. When it comes right down to it, I am not sure that whether something is boring or not, whether it is exciting or not, is a good way to evaluate the worth of any situation. Would I like to be able to wake up every morning with someone next to me - you bet - just not sure it has to be the same person every time.

 

I agree with @NickAuzenneNOLA marriage like with all things is what you make of it. Yes familiarity tends to break contempt as the saying goes but there is also a comfort that comes with the familiar. You have to find other things to keep you together with a person other than what attracted to them initially because we change over time. Relationships are hard work and you have to put effort into maintaining them.

 

I found this article to be pretty interesting. While the article is geared towards straight people there are some universal truths. @ockydub or any other members in a long term relationship or marriage any thoughts?

"Marriage is the establishment of routine, the elimination of mystique about significant others, the mundanity of commitment. A lot of married people go out of their way to make marriage seem attractive. We tell our single homies marriage means you get to WAKE UP! EVERY DAY! NEXT TO YOUR BEST FRIEND! There is that. But most days? There are no trumpets accompanying that moment. Just morning breath.

So it is true, in a sense, that marriage is boring and unmysterious. For me, however, this is all its charm"

"Master of None" was right: Marriage is boring. | truly tafakari