Marshawn Lynch Looked Like a State Farm Agent in High School, and the Internet Got Jokes

Marshawn Lynch Looked Like a State Farm Agent in High School, and the Internet Got Jokes

Filed to:MARSHAWN LYNCH

Photo: Kelvin Kuo (AP Images)

Looks like Marshawn Lynch wasn’t always the stone-faced, strong, running back who’s just here so he won’t get fined. In high school, Marshawn Lynch looked like the black guy on a Canadian teen show that was partly sponsored by the school district to teach kids how to say no to drugs and not have sex before marriage.

During the suppression of the black protest and the impending clusterfuck of black bodies crashing against each other for white owners’ amusement that is the National Football League, Lynch’s Oakland Raiders took on the Los Angeles Rams. During a segment on the show, they posted a photo of high school Marshawn Lynch and he literally looked like the grocery bagger who snitches on other grocery baggersthat take long smoke breaks.



If you had to bet whether or not this kid was going to become a tax accountant or one of the most punishing running backs in NFL history not named Jim Brown, I wouldn’t blame you for choosing the former because the kid in that picture looks like he played on the professional Dungeons & Dragons circuit and got nosebleeds from riding on Ferris wheels.

Seriously, high school photos are awesome in this way and not because they aren’t flattering. In fact, there is nothing wrong with this photo of youth pastor Marshawn Lynch who wants to know if you have a few moments to talk about his lord and savior Jesus Christ. I actually love this photo of Marshawn Lynch because it means that there was a time in his life we he wasn’t carrying the weight of the word on his shoulders.

Oh and make no mistake about it, Beast Mode is a part of the resistance, as Lynch sat during the national anthem again.

Of course the Internet had jokes but it was all in good fun.





Don’t get it twisted, when it was time to hit the field, Lynch would transform into Beast Mode even in high school.



Perhaps this is where Lynch’s philosophy on football originated that a became my personal mantra and is also the greatest piece of personal advice ever given: