No Asians, no black people. Why do gay people tolerate blatant racism?

Discussion in 'Dating and Relationships' started by Lancer, Nov 24, 2016.

  1. Lancer

    Best Thread Creator The 1000 Daps Club

    Age:
    37
    Joined:
    Nov 1, 2015
    Messages:
    1,263
    Daps Received:
    1,869
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Minas Morgul
    [​IMG]

    Racism is a serious problem within the LGBT community and needs to be addressed. Despite the determination of many minority ethnic LGBT people to do just that, it is not happening. “How can I be a bigot when I am myself a member of an oppressed minority?” is a prevailing attitude among some white LGBT people. But another far more pernicious reason is that the LGBT world revolves around white gay men to the exclusion of others. The rainbow flag is whiter than it appears.

    “I’m sexualised for my skin tone and never treated as a person,” Saif tells me. “The community is trained to accept a white, ‘masc’, muscled gay man and the rest of us are not really accepted or ‘one of their own’.” It’s not the individual he blames, but being conditioned by a community that venerates the “sexual image of a white gay man”. According to research by FS magazine, an astonishing 80% of black men, 79% of Asian men and 75% of south Asian men have experienced racism on the gay scene.

    This manifests itself in numerous ways. Some are rejected because of their ethnicity; on the other hand, some are objectified because of it. On dating sites and apps, profiles abound that say “no Asians” or “no black people”, casually excluding entire ethnic groups. It’s like a “bastardised ‘No dogs, no blacks, no Irish’ signs”, as Anthony Lorenzo puts it.

    “On apps like Grindr,” writes Matthew Rodriguez, “gay men brandish their racial dating preferences with all the same unapologetic bravado that straight men reserve for their favourite baseball team.”

    Homi tells me he has Persian ancestry, and is “sometimes mistaken for being Greek, Italian, Spanish, etc”. Once, at a nightclub, he was relentlessly pursued by a fellow patron. Eventually, he was asked: “Where are you from?” When Homi answered India, the man was horrified. “I’m so sorry – I don’t do Indians! Indians are not my type.”


    And it is not simply a western phenomenon. Luan, a Brazilian journalist, tells me his country has a “Eurocentric image of beauty” and there is a “cult of the white man, which is absurd, given more than half the population is black or brown”. Others speak of their experiences of being rejected by door staff at LGBT venues. Michel, a south Asian man, tells me of being turned away because “you don’t look gay”, and being called a “dirty Paki”. He says it has got worse since the Orlando nightclub massacre, where the gunman was Muslim.

    And then there’s the other side of the equation: objectification. Malik tells about his experiences of what he describes as the near “fetishisation” of race. The rejection of people based on ethnicity is bad enough, he says, “but it can be just as gross when someone reduces you to your ethnicity, without consent, when dating/hooking up”. His Arab heritage was objectified and stereotyped by some would-be lovers, even down to presuming his sexual role.

    When the Royal Vauxhall Tavern – a famed London LGBT venue – hosted a “blackface” drag act, Chardine Taylor-Stone launched the Stop Rainbow Racismcampaign. The drag act featured “exaggerated neck rolling, finger snapping displays of ‘sassiness’, bad weaves” and other racial stereotypes, she says. After launching a petition against the event, she received threats of violence. “White LGBTQs who are truly against racism need to step up and take ownership of what is happening in their community,” she writes.


    LGBT publications are guilty too. Historically, they’ve been dominated by white men, have neglected issues of race, and have portrayed white men as objects of beauty. Dean stopped buying mainstream gay magazines two years ago. “The only time they would write about people of colour is when they had done something homophobic,” he says. “The gay media is completely whitewashed.”

    There has been positive change in recent months, one leading black gay journalist tells me, but only because of the work of ethnic minority LGBT individuals “holding magazines to account, setting up their own nights across the scene” and using social media, blogs, podcasts and boycotts to force change.

    While LGBT people are much more likely than heterosexuals to suffer from mental distress, the level is even higher among ethnic minorities. Undoubtedly, racism plays a role. As Rodriguez puts it, seeing dating app profiles rejecting entire ethnic groups causes “internalised racism, decreased self-esteem and psychological distress.”

    Many of the rights and freedoms that all LGBT people won were down to the struggles of black and minority ethnic people: at the Stonewall riots, for example, non-white protesters. The least that white LGBT people can do is to reciprocate and confront racism within their own ranks. Shangela, an actor, tells me that racism from the LGBT community “hurts more because it’s coming from people that I’m meant to share a kinship with”.

    The far-right movements on the march across the western world are consciously trying to co-opt the LGBT rights campaign for their own agenda. Muslims are portrayed as an existential threat to gay people, particularly after Orlando. There are those who only talk about LGBT rights if it is to bash Muslims or migrants as a whole. American white nationalist websites now sell LGBT pride flags along with the Confederate flag. This week, Milo Yiannopolous – a gay attention-seeker who has become an icon of the US far right – was at the centre of a media storm because a platform to speak at his old school was withdrawn. In the Netherlands, the anti-immigrant right was led by a gay man, Pim Fortuyn, until his assassination. In France, reportedly a third of married gay couples support the far-right National Front.

    The struggle against racism has, of course, to be led by people of colour who suffer the consequences – such as Black Out UK, which fights for a platform for black gay men, and Media Diversified, which campaigns for minority representation in the media. But unless white LGBT people – who the official gay scene venerates – listen to the voices of those who are sidelined, little will change.

    Being oppressed yourself does not mean you are incapable of oppressing others: far from it. LGBT people have had to struggle against bigotry and oppression for generations. It is tragic that they inflict and ignore injustice in their own ranks.

    No Asians, no blacks. Why do gay people tolerate such blatant racism? | Owen Jones
     
    Jdudre and ColumbusGuy dapped this.
  2. Lancer

    Best Thread Creator The 1000 Daps Club

    Age:
    37
    Joined:
    Nov 1, 2015
    Messages:
    1,263
    Daps Received:
    1,869
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Minas Morgul
    I have said it before and will again. I am an equal opportunity consumer. I treat my men like my food, I EAT ANYTHING!!!
    If he is a racist/prejudiced I spit him out instantly! I have long stopped buying gay mags with white only in the pages then the only person of colour is used to advertise HIV medication or Condoms. Long stopped going to WHITE only gay run news site's, no watching white only movies/gay films. Will my cents be missed, I am sure not. However that is my personal decision.
    If you are not welcome, why bother staying???
    [​IMG]
     
    BlackguyExecutive and OckyDub dapped this.
  3. ColumbusGuy

    The 100 Daps Club

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2016
    Messages:
    2,421
    Daps Received:
    2,992
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Backwater, Ohio
    Orientation:
    Gay
    Dating:
    Not looking
    “White LGBTQs who are truly against racism need to step up and take ownership of what is happening in their community,”

    This.

    As bad as it must be on those Apps, the idiots who do the 'no rice, no chocolate, no spice' stuff are actually doing you a favor by letting you know that they are either blatantly racist or at the very least extremely rude and insensitive. Fuck them..actually, don't fuck them-block/ignore them and move on-that is the point I am trying to make. They are damaged goods and you don't need or want them-you are better than that.
     
    Jdudre and OckyDub dapped this.
  4. acessential

    Squad Leader Best Thread Creator The 1000 Daps Club

    Joined:
    Sep 4, 2015
    Messages:
    665
    Daps Received:
    1,858
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Roaming
    I mean, I get it. I do. But I dislike how discussions on racism in the gay community always revolve around sex and attraction. It always involves men of color wanting to be desired by blonde hair, blue eyed Billy and Bobby. Like who cares? Why do we feel like we need to be desirable to white boys? Let's talk about real racism in the LGBT community. Like how a lot of resources for HIV/AIDS research amongst LGBT organizations dwindled once gay white men were no longer the largest victims of the epidemic. Despite the fact that gay black men are still infected at increasingly high rates. Or how the majority of hate crimes amongst LGBT people are people of color especially trans women of color. And yet organizations don't necesssarily reflect that. Those are real discussions of race and racism I want to have. Not whether or not Bobby likes black guys. Wanting to be desired by white men, in my opinion, just feeds into white supremacy.
     
  5. Dante

    Dante https://www.gofundme.com/qv7v5dw
    The Great Debater The 1000 Daps Club

    Age:
    40
    Joined:
    Sep 18, 2015
    Messages:
    872
    Daps Received:
    1,242
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Baltimore, MD
    Orientation:
    Homosexual
    Dating:
    Single
    I concur.
     
  6. @yahoo.com

    @yahoo.com When the lights get low, I Burn Brighter.
    The 100 Daps Club

    Age:
    43
    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2015
    Messages:
    299
    Daps Received:
    348
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Atlanta, Ga
    Orientation:
    Gay
    Dating:
    Single
    this is so tired to me... i don't like white men, so i put in my profile. no whites. i don't like fat people. so - i put no fat boys. it is personal preference, not prejudice. my profile is popping too - I don't have time to go through and ignore all the people who i could have kindly put my disclaimer up front - - don't waste your time because your message will not get a response. simple. or t least it is to me. wTF am I missing????

    This is a constant theme here and i cannot understand why? If i do not like you or find your type attractive in any way - no stupid article is going to make me have change of heart... And I do not have hard feelings for these people, but when i wake up in the morning i want to see an mandingo african warrior... not some pudgy, insert race, funny sounding, cant use my comb or brush, white / asian / indian - etc. but in my non-sexual life i am good friends with all races and even some who identify as mutts. IJS.
     
    Cyrus-Brooks dapped this.
  7. ColumbusGuy

    The 100 Daps Club

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2016
    Messages:
    2,421
    Daps Received:
    2,992
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Backwater, Ohio
    Orientation:
    Gay
    Dating:
    Not looking
    This is all fine and good, but why can't you just say "I want an in-shape black man like myself' instead of no whites, no fats, etc.? It is just basic civility here we are talking about...and basic civility is something that is a starting point for many other decent things-it is not something we want to lose as human beings, no matter in what circumstances. Why state something in a negative way when you can state it in more positive way?

    And yeah it may not be a matter of prejudice, but it is a matter of civility and basic manners. We are worse of as a society because of the lack of these things. JMHO.
     
    Cyrus-Brooks dapped this.
  8. @yahoo.com

    @yahoo.com When the lights get low, I Burn Brighter.
    The 100 Daps Club

    Age:
    43
    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2015
    Messages:
    299
    Daps Received:
    348
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Atlanta, Ga
    Orientation:
    Gay
    Dating:
    Single
    ^^^ Good point... i will try that. and then i will let you know how many knuckle heads missed the softer way of saying i don't want your white ass ... but, i will try it.

     
    ColumbusGuy dapped this.
  9. ColumbusGuy

    The 100 Daps Club

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2016
    Messages:
    2,421
    Daps Received:
    2,992
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Backwater, Ohio
    Orientation:
    Gay
    Dating:
    Not looking
    If they don't get it, then fuck them-that is on them. You are not doing it the 'nice way' for them-you are doing it for you so you are the better person. Just like forgiving someone is not for them-it is for you, so you can get the heck over it. If you are civil and they don't get the message, then you have a blank check to make it more 'obvious' but you still have the moral high ground.

    I really was not trying to attack you or anything....but I have said what I have said about this over and over and I still say it now-and I say it regarding anyone who is rude in this scenario. Civility and decency wins because it will benefit you more than anyone. Just because others are asses does not mean you have to sink to their level. If you can be the better person just as easily as being the asshole, why not be the better person? That's all I was saying. Ok? No hard feelings? lol.
     
  10. OhSheit

    Bae Material The 1000 Daps Club

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2015
    Messages:
    1,136
    Daps Received:
    1,595
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    New York
    Orientation:
    Bicurious
    Dating:
    In a Relationship
    The issue on those apps is that people are just dicks about it and never state what they like...but that's the apps for you. Most people on there are rude, shallow and mentally ill.

    and this is more important
     
    Jdudre dapped this.
  11. BlackguyExecutive

    BlackguyExecutive Je suis diplomate
    Squad Leader Best Site Comments The 1000 Daps Club Supporter

    Age:
    35
    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2015
    Messages:
    1,032
    Daps Received:
    2,475
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    World Traveller
    Orientation:
    Gay
    Dating:
    Married
    How many times are people going to write about what we obviously know. There is considerable racism in the LGBT community. I think this is also related to sexism and classism. We can't attempt to talk about racism without including class and gender divides in the broader community.

    With that being said, I think we should all appreciate when people write this garbage in their profiles. That means you can easily identify the trash and keep it moving. I also feel like this problem is more apparent in America because we are less homogenous than other places. However, with that being said, I think there is a lot of racial fetishism in other western cultures, particularly in Europe.
     
Loading...
Similar Threads - Asians black tolerate Forum Date
Jo Koy Reveals How To Tell Asians Apart Comedy Dec 19, 2019
Cynet Prefers Caucasians Career, Work, Finances and Education Apr 29, 2019
Guy suing Grindr for allowing discrimination against Asians LGBT News and Events Jul 10, 2018
NBA Player Jeremy Lin on Asians and Masculinity Sports and Athletes Apr 27, 2017
Twitter Explodes after ESPN Host Wears ‘Caucasians’ Shirt to Call Out Cleveland Indians Logo Sports and Athletes Apr 8, 2016

Share This Page

Loading...