Brehs, we present to you a new episode of the CYPHER AVENUE PODCAST where you’ll hear us give updates, engage in heated topic debates, interviewing interesting homosexual men of color and us verbally adding on to the articles posted on the website.
The episodes will be available in four ways: You can listen to them on the site, watch on YouTube, download a MP3 version or subscribe to us on iTunes for automatic updates!
In this podcast, Cypher Avenue founders Ocky Williams & Nick Delmacy discuss Michael Sam being drafted into the NFL, Derrick Gordon, Jason Collins, Jay-Z, Beyonce & Solange Elevator Fight, Donald Sterling, #BringBackOurGirls, Interracial Gay Couples, Black Gay Couples, the judgmental black gay community versus the carefree heterosexual community and much more!
MP3 VERSION:
DOWNLOAD LINK:
If you listen you will know why I list this info here…
Jews are usually said to comprise about 0.2% of the world’s population, so 11% of the world’s billionaires means they’re doing pretty well.
US has 442 billionaires and 105 of them are Jewish which equals 24%
http://mondoweiss.net/2013/04/forbes-jewish-billionaires.html
http://www.forbes.co.il/news/new.aspx?pn6Vq=J&0r9VQ=IEII
There’s a lot to be said about the differences in the reactions to a black man coming out to his people versus a white man in the white community,but especially with the black church aspect of our culture.
I’ve attended white churches and black churches, all here in my home state.The black ones almost always condemned homosexuality whereas the white ones accepted their openly homosexual members and never had sermons against it( not that I’ve witnessed at least).I’m sure there are white churches that do,but I the ones I’ve attended have been at little more progressive about it.
The harshest thing I’ve heard from a white pastor is “I don’t think the person is inherently bad,I believe the sin is in the act”
Agreed! I’m sure people who grew up or currently live in small towns know exactly what we mean. But its very prevalent in big cities as well…Black people in general seem to be more judgmental, materialistic and superficial. In my opinion.
Ur absolutely right..but as a 30+ man u HAVE to know that it’s all relative. Blk ppl, as a big whole mass of folks, are waaaay less experienced. There’s alot more ignorance..not stupidity..ignorance..the lack of awareness, involved w blk folks. Eventho I live in NYC, and at 31 have been exposed to so much, my ratchet ass cousins upstate have a completely different level of awareness.
@Nick @SB3000 I get what both of you guys mean.I think the materialistic nature and us wanting to “dress to impress” comes from excitement at having (or sometimes appearing to have) tangible symbols of success. The ignorance comes in with not being aware that our accomplishments shouldn’t come with ostentatious behavior.
“Tangible Symbols of Success” this is exactly what it is…Include “fame and notoriety” to this list….They have to be seen and “appear” to be successful, even if they are not. Just look at the conversation playing out above us, a recurring actor on CSI: Las Vegas (one of the highest rated TV shows) is considered not successful compared to a broke gay college student with tattoos in the media recently.
These dudes beat certain subjects INTO THE GROUND when they feel they are right about a topic. Problem is: they are NEVER right. Why must you disrespect dudes who come to your site to state their opinion simply because you don’t agree with them? Why do the guys who have a problem with the interracial relationships of these black gay men have to be “bitter”, have a “mary j blige syndrome” or even be fem? You think only fem black gay men have a problem with these interracial relationships? The problem with the relationships is that ALL of these white men have something to gain by dating/being with these high profile black men. The black men are being used! Not only for the “big black dick” that white men chase us for. They are being used for the celebrity, potential money and fringe benefits. The sad thing is these black men are so stupid they don’t even realize they are being used! You don’t think they are being used??? Give me ONE example of a successful gay white man (who is relevant in the media) who is dating a black man with lesser means than himself…..go ahead…I’ll wait!
“Give me ONE example of a successful gay white man (who is relevant in the media) who is dating a black man with lesser means than himself…..go ahead…I’ll wait!”
Uhhhh…I would say that Derrick Gordon’s boyfriend probably is more successful and has more means considering Derrick is a college student. Just the one example you asked for.
@rolandgarros28 No Dice! He is NOT mainstream. I specifically said “relevant in the media.” Nobody knows who the fuck he is. Plus, how do you know he has money? Just because he is on a web series doesn’t mean he has money.
My point has been made: white gay men (just by sheer numbers alone) outnumber us by probably 10 to 1 and we don’t have NOT ONE example of a mainstream high profile white man with a black lover, however there are a shitload of high profile black men with white lovers.
White men have used us (black people) for CENTURIES and it’s time we end this cycle. I really hope these dumb black guys wake up and realize that they are a part of the problem and not the solution.
I mean, when you say relevant in the media, that’s all “relevant” to be honest. David McCullouch is not just a web series actor. He actually starred on CSI on network television. I think the whole argument being made by @nick and @ocky is that black gay men never think anyone is truly relevant. We don’t know what’s in anyone’s wallet so there is no way to say who is dating up or down. @kappaprince, if you’re waiting for a gay man to come out in the same realm as Oprah, then you’ll be waiting for a long time.
@rolandgarros28 Dude, you just made my point! The dude’s name is GERALD McCullouch, NOT David! LOL. See, you don’t even know the dudes name…which makes him irrelevant. Relevancy is whether your name is a household name.
My point is this: white gay men GREATLY outnumber black gay men (we as a people only make up 13% of the population). And you can BARELY [with Gerald Mccullouch…who is a HUGE stretch] give me ONE white dude with a black lover. The problem is clear! White men who has success do not value Us as black gay men as partners. But the minute a nigga gets a little bit of fame or notoriety he goes running to the other side kissing the white man’s ass.
Damn…That was a mistype. I was thinking of another David. You an asshole for that. LOL Ok so there are only a handful of white gay men that you would deem “relevant.” I imagine, Elton John, Ricky Martin, Anderson Cooper etc. Again, there aren’t that many out powerful white men and even fewer black ones so there aren’t many out relevant men period. And by the way, Anderson Cooper actually dated a dark man before but kept it private as he has his relationships with his white boyfriends. Again, If you’re waiting for a million gay black Oprah’s to come out and start dating other high profile gay black Oprahs, you’ll never see it. Just my opinion.
Also, why you coming at the founders like that? You don’t like their website? LOL They’re cool and I can say that everyone who choses to come here and comment has a forum to do that as long as they are respectful. People don’t get blocked here as they do on other websites.
@rolandgarros28 I am NOT coming at the founders….the founders seem to enjoy disrespecting other people’s opinions. If you disagree with Nick or Ocky then they attack your masculinity and all other forms of bullshit. I have seen it time and time again. Calling people “bitter” and “fem” if they dont agree with you is some stupid shit and I spoke my mind about it. I don’t care who like it.
My question is: why are you kissing the founders ass? Do they pay you to come to their rescue? Are they paying for your apartment or mortgage? I’m not understanding why you feel that disrespecting people is a cool thing to do.
“Anderson Cooper has dated a “dark” man.” What the hell does “dark” mean? Is the dude black or not? where are the photos? Dude, everything you type reinforces my original comment.White mainstream successful men do not “boo up” with their black lovers in public. They chase the shit out of us, they want to fuck us, they want the big black dick but they do not value us as lovers once they have become successful. Same way white plantation owners visited the black slave quarters late at night.
@kappaprince, I’m not defending them honestly. If you’ve been around long enough as I have, you know they can handle that themselves. I’m just stating that people have a forum to voice their opinions and if they feel offended, they don’t have to participate. I don’t agree with everything they say and I’ve voiced differing opinions before; had wars of words, but I personally don’t feel disrespected. If they feel someone is being bitter, then they say the shit. You feel a certain way about them and you said it too. How is that being disrespectful? This is online not real life. Nobody means that much to me to offend me anonymously online.
And….by dark I mean his ass wasn’t Caucasian. It was an interracial relationship and it’s an example of what you asked for. And as far as other white successful men who have black partners/lovers/wives/husbands…1. Robin Thicke & Paula Patton, David Bowie & Iman, Heidi Klum & Seal, Robert De Niro & Grace Hightower, George Lucas & Melody Hobson, Roger Ebert & Chaz Ebert. Ok. so all successful whites partnered with blacks…(the white people are listed first)
@rolandgarros28 “dark” is equivalent to non-white people??? Where they do that at? Just fuck the asians, hispanics, middle eastern, etc. huh? Also, you list all these interracial couples…we are discussing GAY black men and GAY white men? where in the hell do you get Robin Thicke and Paula Patton and all the rest of the people you listed [fyi-Heidi Klum and Seal are divorced]? They have no relevance to THIS conversation. I said name a WHITE gay man who is mainstream that has a black lover. You can give me none. So let’s just agree to disagree on this subject. But next time don’t jump onto the conversation with no facts.
@kappaprince, facts will not satisfy you because you have a visceral reaction to seeing ANY interracial couple and that’s fine. Neither of us know these couples personally so I’m confused as to how you can reduce these black men to being “too stupid to realize they’re being used.” I suppose you know them better than they know themselves. When you make comments like that, you’re being just as disrespectful to these grown black men as you state the moderators are to people who disagree with them on this site. Let’s not make generalizations about white men using all black men. Perhaps some white men see the beauty in a black man when other black men can’t even see the beauty in black men. If you don’t think much of these evil white men, at least we can give our brothers a little more respect than you’ve given them.
@kappaprince Hey man, I been watching this site for years but this conversation stream made me want to sign up and actually post something. I never thought about interracial relationships from the stand point that the white person in the relationship had something to gain. It makes for a very interesting argument. I, like you, think that some of these black men are definitely being used for various reasons. Some for money and fame and some, like Derick Gordon for sex. I mean come on, a 21 year old with a man who is 47? and white. What would they possibly have in common? But I say this; some people have to learn through life experiences. Let them knuckleheads go out there and get used up by these white men. Some dudes have to learn the hard way that everything that glitters aint gold!
“Give me ONE example of a successful gay white man (who is relevant in the media) who is dating a black man with lesser means than himself…”
Denis O’Hare & Hugo Redwood
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/05/09/denis-hugo-gay-family_n_5296991.html
Sorry for the non-substantive comment, but Denis O’Hare’s partner is cute– very good-looking man!
@psychnoir Are we looking at the same photo? They both look like meth addicts. And the poor little black baby is sitting there looking like he ready to bounce at a moment’s notice.
THIS! ^^^
This comment..so many feelings. As an African who is from East Africa, it reminds me of very arrogant Nigerians. Nothing more needs to be said about this comment.
This black guy is exactly the same kind of black guy that would bully Frank Ocean for liking art, insult Michael Sam because he likes reading and find Jason Collins repulsive because he is an academic geek, if they were not famous.
But because they are, they have to go out with a guy like you and the commenters on here?? So go out with a guy who puts you down, thinks your not man enough, hates art, hates different cultures, is narrow minded, is mean spirited but hey! He’s black!
Thanks for showing how selfish and projectionist black gay men who have been complaining about this are.
smdh.
So if the white man is more famous or richer he is using the black man for sex. If the black man is more famous than the white man is using him for fame or money.
But if it is a black couple than every thing is perfect because a black man would never USE another black man. I think I got it now.Don’t trust the white man they are up to no good.Only trust a brother they won’tscrew you over.
@Joe If I am going to be used…I’d rather it be by a black man than the white man who already has everything. It’s for the preservation of the race. Black people need to start looking out for each other like every other race on the planet does. History has taught us again and again that white men are very manipulative, egotistical and elitist…it’s just simply in their nature to tear down other ethnic groups in order to preserve their way of life. Black people have gotta stop serving “massa” and making it EASY for him to succeed in his ultimate goal. This is the ONLY way for us to survive.
Also, no one ever said that the black couple will be “perfect.” Nothing is ever perfect in any situation. But the black couple is definitely IDEAL! The white man cannot possibly know what the everyday struggles of a black men are. When the black men is pulled over by the racist cops simply for being black and driving a luxury vehicle, the white can’t fully sympathize with his black partner. If people believe that racism is still not alive and well have got serious mental issues. Just take a look at what’s going on with Obama in the White House. This man is the president and still can’t get any simple respect.
Loved the podcast, this was a really interesting topic. I do certainly commend and celebrate the examples of black gay male couples you’ve found, as I was unaware of most of them before listening to the podcast. I think though that a major factor in why people are more heavily focusing on Michael Sam, Derrick Gordon, and Jason Collins, is that not only are they all getting a fair amount of attention in the mainstream media right now, and they’ve all really actively accepted the role of “role model” for the gay community. They recognize being exceptional as the firsts for gay athletes in their fields, and they embrace being looked up to as gay pioneers (this is evident in many of their interviews, especially with Michael Sam and Derrick Gordon).
Generally, we want to see our role models reflecting the positive and admirable aspects of our culture. When a major part of our culture is noticeably absent from these role models (in the three aforementioned cases, black gay pairings), it can almost make that aspect appear negative, like something to avoid. This is what I think really frustrates some people, the idea that the people most willing to embrace leadership as gay role models are, at least right now, not also role models for black on black love. And this is not a judgement on them; anyone can date who they desire. They have no obligation to change or conform their personal life. It just illustrates a void that many people want more visibly filled.
I appreciate the articles and this podcast because it speaks to a lot of the issues, personally and as a whole, when trying to date, keyword trying, black men; especially in Los Angeles.
I agree with Ocky’s comment on how black people need a lot of healing, due to the fact that seemingly just approaching someone with innocent intentions you’re already in the wrong and receiving the side eye. I’ve experienced this not only with “dating” but just trying to establish a friendship has so many stipulations that people themselves I feel don’t realize they’re emanating.
As for interracial relationships I personally don’t see a problem with them. I had this conversation before and the conclusion of it always ends up being that these men, men who predominantly date a certain type of race/nationality, even if they were single would probably not be looking towards black men. If someone prefers white men or latin men etc, then that’s what they like; period. So all the wasted energy and breath on worrying about these men is just shenanigans. I recall Nick himself saying this multiple times if I’m not mistaken.
Anyways, thanks again and I hope to hear and read more.