How Do You Insult A Black Man? Call Him Gay

By OckyDub | Posted Oct 10 2013 | 13 Comments  

I recently watched a video featuring Tommy Sotomayor titled “How Blacks Push Gays Into The Closet & The Problems It Causes”.  For those of you who are not familiar with Mr. Sotomayor he is a radio host and has a YouTube channel where he presents commentary concerning issues within the black community.  Many find his views and commentaries very controversial; however I do find myself agreeing with some of his observations.  For this topic I would like the reader not to focus on the controversy surrounding Mr. Sotomayor but instead focus on the message he is conveying.

In his video commentary that you can view below, Mr. Sotomayor in essence says that black men and women who call black males “gay” or “faggot” as an insult, even when the person they are insulting is not homosexual, can cause many negative ramifications. 

One negative impact the Mr. Sotomayor mentions is that the black males who are gay within the black community will be afraid to come out, live in the closet and be more prone to be on the DL as a way to avoiding being ridiculed.  Also by constantly calling black males “gay” or “fag”, it creates an environment that breeds negative hyper masculinity.  Males are now over compensating in their maleness because they are in fear of being called “gay” or “fag”.

The majority of what was mentioned in the video was common knowledge for me (nothing I haven’t said before) but I never analyzed this particular angle when it comes to black males and hyper masculinity.  Of course I am aware that growing up in certain environments you have to be tough (or at least act like it) or you will be perceived as weak and potentially victimized.  This can absolutely lead some to act out with hyper masculinity especially if the male projecting the hyper masculinity feels that it is working for him.   If most or all the black males in a peer group conduct themselves within the confines of hyper masculinity, what other real life examples exist in the community for them to emulate or counter this image?

Even if you take religion out of this particular equation, the words “gay” and “fag” are hurled constantly as insults from black women to black men and from black men to each other, young black boys learn quickly that being “gay” or being a “fag” is a weak, wrong and bad thing.  Publications and websites that cater to a more black or urban clientele consistently are on witch hunts to Out or speculate which black male celebrities are “gay”.  Many “straight” men are obsessed with “gay” boogey men lurking within their mists and in the process over compensate with hyper masculinity.

It’s like an infinity loop.  Young black boys and girls hear black men and women using “gay” and “fag” as insults regardless of sexual orientation towards black males.  Young black boys (especially those without a male influence in the home) grow up overcompensating and become hyper masculine.   They in turn degrade other black males by calling them “gay” and “fag”.  As for the young black girls, they grow up thinking its okay to insult the black males’ manhood because the adult black women who raised them did it.

Going a little bit deeper, in many cases I believe hyper masculinity in males exists as the results of broken pride and bruised egos.  This can lead to some becoming bullies but also hyper masculinity can lead to promiscuity and having illegitimate children by different women out of wedlock.  Being destructively promiscuous is a way to show how manly one is.  I also think hyper masculinity (misguided pride and ego) is the cause for a lot of beef between black males or as it is sometimes called “Nigga Moments” that result in violence.

*Warning – Old School Rant*
This is why you got these weak, spineless, little wack ass boys trying to be tough. They are afraid to fight but are quick to pull out a gun and shot shit up…because of hyper masculinity.  They can’t comprehend aint nothing wrong with catching an honest ass whippin.  It toughens you up for the next fight; primarily the fight of life and the real world… lil dumb ass bastards.  And when these lil bastards do decide to fight, they will jump one person like cowards and film it with their cell phones, upload it online where other weak, spineless, little wack ass boys see it and think it’s cool.  You little ignorant fuckas!
*Warning – Old School Rant Over*

Unfortunately in my opinion the burden to perhaps break this cycle falls back on the black woman.  We constantly hear black women complaints about the “no good black male” not realizing these “no good black males” were raised by black women in single parent homes.  Of course I am not generalizing all single parent homes run by black women; however if a large percentage of the black family dynamic consist of a single black women raising a family, the female adult parent is responsible. The words you use to describe black males will have an impact on your black sons.

For me boys being raised with only females influences is one reason why some of the younger generations of males are soft and over feminized, which is not a good thing but neither is aggressive hyper masculinity.

 

About the Author
OckyDub

Octavius is a founder and editor of Cypher Avenue. He's here to help speak for us and show the world that masculine gay / bisexual men of color are not a part of the stereotypical gay normal that is seen and fed to the masses. No...we are a distinct breed, filled with character and pride. Cypher Avenue is here to show the world how we are different.

   
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13 Comments Feel Free To Join The Cypher.

  1. hannibal
    Hannibal | October 10th, 2013
    -1
  2. SB3
    African King | October 10th, 2013
    +1
    • LEE B | October 11th, 2013
      +2
      • Dre G | October 11th, 2013
        +2
        • hannibal
          Hannibal | October 11th, 2013
          0
  3. LEE B | October 11th, 2013
    0
  4. Nick Delmacy | October 11th, 2013
    -1
  5. ControlledXaos
    Black Pegasus | October 11th, 2013
    0
  6. questforknowledge
    quest for knowledge | October 20th, 2013
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  7. thinker | December 3rd, 2013
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  8. ldkfjdklf | February 1st, 2014
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  9. Lily | September 21st, 2016
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