Nick Delmacy’s Top 11 New, Hilarious, Sexy and Inspirational Athlete Commercials
This Sunday the Seattle Seahawks and the Denver Broncos battle it out for the championship at Super Bowl XLVIII…For all those that don’t know your roman numerals, this is number…hold up…What the hell number does the L stand for? Gimme a second…carry the 1, now add the remainder….48!
So like I said, the Seahawks and the Broncos will battle it out at Super Bowl 48 this Sunday. To get us all even more hyped up than we all already are for drinking too much beer while eating too many wings while watching too many men with hot bodies in tights, we present to you Nick Delmacy’s favorite new, hilarious, sexy and athletically inspirational commercials featuring some of the biggest athletes in the game.
1. Light. Strong. Nike Flyknit: Kobe Bryant, Ashton Eaton, Richard Sherman, Allyson Felix, and Mo Farah
The newest commercial on this list fittingly by Nike and features (a shirtless) Richard Sherman showing off his lean physique while running in slow motion. Not only is Sherman’s body sexy, his attractive intelligence and confidence shown in the aftermath of his recent “rant” is backed up by Game Tapes that prove he is the Best Cornerback in the NFL.
Ugh, time for me to find a DeLorean time machine, be 25 years old again and hit the gym to get in this good of shape…smh.
2. DeVry University – Deciding Moments: Donovan Ford
DeVry Institute of Technology was always a running joke when I was growing up but I’ve come to appreciate any and all forms of higher education. DeVry University impressed me with this ad campaign that featured 21-year-old student and 2016 weightlifting US Olympic hopeful Donovan Ford. The man can Clean and Jerk 440 lbs barbells! Good Lord! Very inspirational.
3. adidas – Do What Light Does: Robert Griffin III
In this commercial for the lightest adidas shoe ever, Washington Redskins quarterback Robert Griffin III gets inside the head of his defensive opponent to the point where the man imagines that he sees him everywhere. This commercial plays out more like the trailer for a horror movie than anything else. I was genuinely creeped out by it…in a good way.
4. Capri Sun – Roarin’-Butt-Face-Jam: Stephen Curry
This Capri Sun commercial is on the list for no other reason than to see cute Golden State Warriors point guard Stephen Curry shake his ass. You’re welcome.
5. Foot Locker – Tear Away: Russell Westbrook and James Harden
Houston Rocket shooting guard James Harden and Oklahoma City Thunder point guard Russell Westbrook star in this hilarious commercial for Foot Locker. Harden’s performance is actually really good in this, I laugh every time I see his last look to Russell at the end. Side Note: Peep how far Harden’s shoes fly when he rips the clothes off, hilarious!
6. State Farm – The Power of an Assist: Chris Paul
Not gonna lie. I got a serious man-crush for Chris Paul. Not only is the 28 year old Los Angeles Clippers point guard a handsome man, he’s an All Star athlete who’s helped bring the Olympic gold medal home twice. In this commercial for State Farm, we get a double dose of Chris Paul chocolate as the athlete also plays his long lost twin brother, Cliff Paul.
7. Gatorade: Abby Wambach
Western New York Flash soccer player Abby Wambach gave me a SERIOUS gay vibe when I first saw her in this Gatorade commercial on television last year. The way she was staring at that woman told me she was looking for more than a weakness on the soccer field. Turns out, I was right. The 2012 FIFA World Player of the Year married her partner Sarah Huffman back in October 2013. Very dope commercial.
8. Gatorade: Kevin Durant and Dwyane Wade
The first thing I thought when I saw this commercial featuring Oklahoma City Thunder’s forward Kevin Durant and the Miami Heat’s shooting guard Dwayne Wade was, “Man this is a great Gatorage commercial.” The second thing I thought was, “Holup, Kevin and Dwayne were dreaming about each other….Awwww, that’s cute…and very gay.” Seriously though, I really dig this ad, very cinematic and representative of how the friendly competition fear of others outdoing you can motivate you to work harder.
9. Foot Locker – Mirror: James Harden and Kris Humphries
Yo, Foot Locker’s got the most hilarious athlete commercials out right now. In this one, James Harden returns and is joined by Boston Celtics’ power forward Kris Humphries as two NBA players with specific criteria for members of their entourage.
10. Foot Locker + Reebok – Conversation Lift: Shaq and Tyga
Once again, the ad agency for Foot Locker is bringing the comedy. This one features retired 4 times NBA champion center Shaquille O’Neal and overly tattooed rapper Tyga in a hilarious spot that makes fun of Shaq’s height and Tyga’s young age.
11. GEICO: Dikembe Mutombo
My favorite commercial on the list is one from Geico of all companies. Retired Houston Rockets center Dikembe Mutombo returns from obscurity to perform his signature blocks and finger wave in mundane “real life” situations instead of blocking them on the court. “Not in my house,” he says as he slaps the used coffee filter back at the unsuspecting office break room employee. Pure genius.
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